c'est la vie

weirded out by homes with no pets. like where is your creature

Reblog so she lives forever.

20 years. If this gets posted and we all survive for another 20…things might be alright.

GNU random doggo

i love writing out numbers and then putting them in parentheses like "one (1)" even when i dont need to i think its funny

Not to brag but what a time to be childless

today i just (remembers to maintain privacy online) did something really cool. you have to trust me

eating would be fine if it was only a recreational activity. instead, its a horrible sisiphean nightmare and you need to do it every day without fail on threat of pain and death

i have a false tooth filled with a placebo in case i'm ever captured and need to be a control subject

Sleeping like shit is soooo cool because the next day you get to feel like you have a disease