VODKA MUTINI

happy late 13th BIRTHDAY to the TRAGEDY of SPECIALEST BOY ever 

little bit of pieta, little bit of the last supper, little bit of 90s nostalgia -- two months late with starbux but it’s DONE. been working on this here&there since 4/13 cause i really didn’t want my piece for homestuck’s historic 13th birthday to go die a slow death in my WIPs folder. (process video for this coming soon in my patreon).

whenever i feel too old to like homestuck i remember the children are 26 now and wouldn’t understand tiktok either. 90′s kids supremacy babey!!!!!! 

(be gay, do crimes, buy prints here)

some of the reasons homestuck meets the requirements of a traditional epic!

Troll Call!

this is foreshadowed kind of obliquely by one, having chess and pool be exactly the same game in-universe, with sburb taking the form of a collosally complicated game of chess in multiplayer sessions, but taking the form of pool in a single player session, and two, having caliborn switch his king and queen’s appearance, but having them move as if they were the piece they appear to be

vriska appears to be the 8 ball and killing her appears to end their game prematurely, but shes actually the cue ball, and killing her causes a scratch in which she can be placed wherever is most advantageous for the opponent, and english is the 8 ball, and shoving him into the metaphorical pocket that is the black hole from the collapse of the green sun ends the game 

There are 211 deaths of named characters in Homestuck, plus however many aradiabots and ghosts died.

The only characters who never die in any form are Ms. Paint (Thanks @internmarce, I can’t BELIEVE I forgot her), PM, Serenity, Casey, Bec, GCat (Ambiguous ending for sprites and ghosts notwithstanding), and possibly Squarewave, Sawtooth, Vodka Mutiny, and Li’l Seb. And Jane’s dad, depending on whether you consider him a version of John’s dad or not.

On average, each character dies about 2.37 times.

The main 22 players, however, die an average of  5.18 times each.

Also fun fact: 16 people get decapitated in Homestuck, and only 2 of them are Dirk. The other 14 are: Jack Noir (2), Hegemonic Brute (2), Diamonds Droog (1), Crowbar (1), Sawbuck (2), Black King (1), White King (1), Aimless Renegade (1), Violent J of ICP (1), Spidermom (1), and Hussiebot (1).

Dave is responsible for 5 of these.

[Part 1] [Part 2]

Some crappy graphs under the cut