Virtual Carrot

Blanket statement that I will not share individual donations requests, be them reblog or asks. a) i do not have time to vet them b) I like to nurture at least one space without a constant stream of financial stress

My mom likes to tell me about how when I was a little kid riding public transport with her I'd always smile and giggle and chat with weird old ladies who smelled like cat pee and homeless folks and strangers dressed in bizarre outfits but any time a tidy and respectable businessman in a suit and tie waved at me I'd immediately clam up, and she takes a great deal of pride in my supposed inherentability to clock personalities but the truth is I do vaguely remember those bus rides, and it was never about the clothes or the hair or the smell, but more because everyone "strange" asked interesting questions and listened to what I had to say and seemed to think about what I said while the neat and tidy and rigid folks only ever acted like they were going through the motions, which was boring as hell and also pretty annoying

happy 3 year anniversary of wheeze man

Finally, the original has crossed my dash.

@strangezeroz welcome to tumblr where the app decides when you can be gifted with the sight of og memes, you cannot look for these yourself via the search engine, you won’t find them, you have to wait to be gifted them

For those of you who might be new here, Tumblr has no algorithm, legendary memes are brought to your dash by mutuals like pet cats bringing you dead birds.

Official Babcia Mention

i think it's really fun when a rly specific trope is super popular in one particular medium but in other ones it's just totally unheard of. it's the time knife. visual novel players are suuuuper used to death games but many others encountered them for the first time in squid games. the other day my mom showed me all excited the summary of a super original novel she found and it was about a girl who got reincarnated as the main character in her favorite fantasy book

what the fuck is a time knife

We CANNOT have snudity (snake nudity) on this webbed site

Gotta respect their snivacy (snake privacy)

Tumblr porn ban safe snake post

Oh God this post is why, in describing a chapter of a book I read about snakes to a friend, I refered to the shockingly recent discovery of the "snitoris."

I referred to my parents as ‘father’ and ‘mother’ growing up like I was an 19th century aristocratic British child who only saw them on holidays and my peers thought this was strange because it was strange. Everyone else called their parents ‘diddy’ and ‘mama’ and a whole assortment of affectionate addresses but I referred to them like ‘mother’ and ‘father’ were their job titles.

I need a polite and effective way to say "hey your heart is truly in the right place and your anger is often righteous but I think sometimes you’re getting recreationally mad about things that are frankly not worth the amount of energy you’re spending on them, and every time you do this you're driving yourself slightly more insane with nothing to show for it," and then I need a way to broadcast that message through a loudspeaker to roughly 30,000 people at once, and THEN I need a time machine to send that message to my past self lol. and maybe a second time machine in case past me tries to be clever and sabotage the version of me who comes through the first time machine

Tiktok marvel fans really will be out here like "movie fan SHOCKED because i'd rather watch superhero movie #54 in blue and not a sensual 1987 french horror film about a man discovering his wife may not exist set in what is gradually revealed to be a space station" as if you're supposed to agree that superhero movie #54 is the clear winner in this comparison

Love the idea of a story about a complex issue that's told from the perspective of something that cannot comprehend or care about the issue. The way the story would be sliced up and moments that a human would consider pointless would be focused on because the pigeon happened to be there would be hype as fuck

That is a fucking awesome site everyone should visit. Don't skip the Hall of Shame.

You know I never considered how much trust some painter's tape and a sharpie could inspire. I could cause some serious chaos on a perfectly functional vending machine this way