Jeff the killer is gonna Jeff the kill you

Worlds oldest haunted house has passed away at the age of 207

the replacement of websites with apps sounds so backwards when you actually describe it. like hmm you have to download an entire program onto your device each time you want access to a portal, where it takes up storage indefinitely. somebody should invent an app where you can "browse" any portal just by typing in its address... 🥴

pop health science is so annoying bc it'll be like "did you know? eating strawberries will give you mega cancer" and you're like pfft whatever begone influencer. but sometimes then you'll see a reasonably credible article like "Study Shows Possible Link Between Strawberries and Mega Cancer" and you're not usually the type to follow that kind of thing religiously but idk maybe you should consider not eating strawberries? but then there's another article saying "Strawberry/Mega Cancer Study Debunked" and it turns out the original study had a sample size of 3 and was funded by Big Blueberry, and strawberries may have a small connection to mega cancer but only if you are genetically predisposed to mega cancer and eat 50 strawberries every day. so you return to your strawberry eating life. but whenever you eat strawberries in public someone tells you about the mega cancer.

not many people know this but when talking about your multiple pronoun-using friend you build up a combo meter for every subsequent unique pronoun you use

Me reading a recipe that in no way requires crispy chili oil: the crispy chili oil is implied

Im so used to my queer echochamber that when a woman doesnt have armpit hair its like a jumpscare

This is such a "common sense" way of putting it. Everybody memorize this for spitting it back out whenever needed.

Never thought I'd have the opportunity to say this again: Reducing women and girls to their vaginas and then forcing them to show those vaginas to strangers is not a feminist ideal.

my best friend linen my brother in arms cotton my partner wool my beautiful sister silk

our sick deranged enemy polyester....

the demon lord, prince of lies, "Vegan Leather"...

"looks you can take from day to night" turned out to be a much smaller problem in my life than magazines led me to believe in the early 2000s

girlhood this girlhood that. woman you are 26

I got a message about how this is supposedly mean. I am holding your hand when I say that refusing womanhood and clinging onto girlhood will not save you from the realities of adulthood. I am not saying you are not young. 26 is incredibly young. you are free to love the concepts and media associated with girlhood but there is much to love about womanhood that you are not seeing. there is something to be said for being free of the shackles of girlhood and childhood. you are an autonomous being. you have power over your life and the paths you will take. it is easier to see the paths when you start taking yourself seriously instead of waiting for others to do so. no one is saying you have to be serious. womanhood is joy too. a different shade of yellow

it's shit i didn't even register before transitioning too. i went out with my friends to a diner yesterday, one is a girl and the other gets clocked as a girl, and when we went in and they asked for the name of the table they asked Me specifically. like looked dead in my eyes and asked Me. i was addressed when it orders and payment first as well. like. Damn. Okay. Shit