becoming disillusioned.

And of the four people present I was the only one who was shocked. The others all nodded as if to say, yes yes, we know, the chicken fucking.

So he explained, when a progressive person is analyzing a behavior they will typically use the metric, Harm/No Harm. They may not like things in the No Harm category but they wouldn’t object.

Conversely, a more conservative mindset used something like eight metrics. Authority/No Authority Moral/Not Moral, things like that.

So, he posited if you want to sound out someone’s mindset (and you’re willing to live with the repercussions) you can ask: if a man buys a dead chicken from the store, cleans it thoroughly, then fucks it, and then eats it himself…?

I listened in dawning horror, both rapt and disgusted. But into the growing pause I whispered, “No harm…” because it really has no effect on me or anyone else if a man fucks a dead chicken. I don’t like it, I think he’s a weird dude, but like. That’s his dick. But a more conservative person will hear that and object on moral grounds despite not being harmed.

"Kinks cause both mental and physical harm" is false. When you say something that is untrue as if it were factual, you are spreading misinformation.

"By the progressive metric" citation needed. I cannot find evidence of the existence of such a metric.

You are really, -really- focused on choking, which all the actual kinksters in this thread have glad you isn't a thing in the way you seem to believe it is.

Do you understand that for the people interested in breath play, it -does- feel good and fun? No one has to 'convince' them.

https://www.healthline.com/health/healthy-sex/erotic-asphyxiation

https://www.jhunewsletter.com/article/2010/11/a-peek-behind-the-curtain-the-basics-of-bdsm-and-breath-play-90395/

Fact: a kid in my high school literally died from experimenting with autoerotic asphyxiation. Because he enjoyed the sensation but didn't know how to safely explore those feelings. If he'd had access to a resource like this: https://www.tryquinn.com/blog/breath-play

then he might be alive today.

Pornography is not a teaching tool.

Everyone should be taught, before accessing porn, that porn is not a teaching tool. It's fiction. It's more often than not 'do not try this at home'

You have accused me on being deliberately obtuse elsewhere in this discussion. I turn that on you now; do you really and truly not understand that mitigation of risk through knowledge saves lives? Do you think that humans will stop masturbating in ways that feel good if you say 'IT IS WRONG AND BAD TO LIKE THAT' hard enough?

Hint: No, it's not ok!

the problem with a utilitarian worldview is the oversimplification and lack of nuance. watching pornography or engaging in kink is harmful because studies prove it rewires your brain via dopamine reward and causes you to seek increasingly extreme stuff, similar to getting radicalized by facebook algorithms. repeatedly engaging in violent or non-consensual fantasies is a strong predictor of who will actually be sexually violent.

if they teach the material in such a way that the majority of kids don't understand or retain the information, that's on the education they provide, not the students.

also because audiobooks are expensive as hell and difficult to pirate, so money allows you to be much more well read than people who can't afford em.

How sad they must be!

If only they had beed educated enough to write!

Think of what spiritual insights, and wonderful music could have been made if only Christian women were treated like humans, respected by the men in their lives + talked about for centuries later!

this is why i dont want to have sex without feelings and care for each other anymore - it almost feels like im prostituted all over again, bad in a different way because i actually like the men i sleep with and want them to like and appreciate me too and consider my desires (dont get me wrong obviously prostitution is always worse than sleeping with men im actually attracted to and want to have sex with but it hurts in a different way to realise that ive often also been just a means to get off to them).

like for example, since sex buyers often pay for time instead of sex act (or both combined), they want to get the most out of their money and do the most to you in the set time - but as a prostitute you want to get it over with as soon as possible and it feels like torture. meanwhile so many heterosexual men who dont pay for sex try to reach orgasm as soon as possible and then its over, lmao. like the direct comparison between having been prostituted and having voluntary sex with men will make you feel absolutely crazy but it also made me realise why i thought i didnt even like sex for so long. because i was always treated like an object, not a person. men will do the bare minimum to keep you around for sex if they dont see you as wife material (and then they also do just little more than the bare minimum up until they reached their goal of marriage then usually start neglecting their wives as we know).

which brings home the point that we need a cultural and legal shift. as long as men treat sex as masturbation with another person, and women as objects or tools, there will always be demand for prostitution, and there will always be (privileged) women deluded into thinking „might as well get paid for it“ or even „at least now im being appreciated“, paradoxically. thats how bad heterosexual men treat women in bed.

this also emphasises that yes, #allmen, because even the men who dont buy sex contribute to the system of sexual exploitation with their behaviour. the reason ive heard men say most often why they dont buy sex is not care for women, but pride. they can convince women to get them off so why pay for it? same with porn, they dont stop watching because they care about women, but because their dick stopped working. and then of course you have a lot of sex buyers who dont even want to do the bare minimum mentioned above so they buy sex to go immediately to using a womans body with no „hassle“. the state of heterosex is fucking dire because i know im by far not the only one experiencing this.