✩

​Time to googl[remembers i want the cool leftist mutuals to like me] duck duck go something [remembers that bragging about activism is performative and virtue signaling] i mean search something somewhere [remembers that it’s gonna be 34 degrees celsius tomorrow] i mean move into a cold dark cave to live with the isopods

giving increasingly loud sighs as I wait for my crush to ask "what's wrong?" so I can say I'm in a state of depression unless I can touch someone's boobs with no bra

I stop once I start getting short of breath

[Your crush, on the phone to someone unseen] Yeah I think she needs to be put down, her breathing-- yeah I know it can be a problem for her breed, but it's getting really bad.

I'M NOT A DOG??????

[clearly less interested now] Oh.

wait! au au

[walking over the distant horizon, towards the West]

AU AU!!! AU AU!!!!! 😭

i think from how i blog its quite obvious that nothing bad has ever happened to me

in small fandoms you need to be grateful to the person who only accidentally hit you twice with a frying pan while trying to make you breakfast. in big fandoms you can block people for wearing a shirt you don’t like

[ Begin ID: Screenshot of tags by @/lightbrand that read "#me retweeting achilles fanart from the guy that also draws paw patrol yaoi #dont worry about that tag im fighting demons you couldnt even comprehend" / End ID ]

there is nothing more important than a dear friend you can be a huge fucking asshole hater with

[Image ID: Tumblr tag reading: #Posts those two old muppets would make /End ID]

Pro tip: when you see a brand new slang term, your first question should be how that term has been used in AAVE for the past 20-30 years.

[ID. Tumblr tag: "and if it isn't aave you should check to make sure it isn't a neo-nazi term"]

*trying to say i enjoyed something* this thing made me feel sick and made me writhe around on the floor

Estrogen would not save Bad Luck Brian btw

[ID: screenshot of the all-caps text "DNI IF YOU ARE PLANNING ON KILLING ME" followed by the sad ant preparing to leave with a bindle meme]

He was as tall as he was tall, and his eyes were the color they were. To describe his hair one would say that he had some. His face had all the features you'd expect, and none of the ones you wouldn't. "There he is," people would often say of him, but only when he was there. And they were right.

If multiple people tell you your work contains racist stereotypes and your solution is to, in the sequel of said work, turn the characters you were planning on being nonwhite into white people to “avoid steryotypes”, you are a fucking racist and are showing you’re unwilling to learn from your mistakes. Like, Jesus Christ man

literally the worst way of ending a series is “all the survivors are happily straight married with tons and tons of babies!” 

people still getting mad at this post i made in 2014 so I will add here. in 2026. that the point of this post isn’t “happy endings bad” its when the story’s only way to imagine a happy ending is a heterosexual nuclear family for everyone.