les mis fandom stop making Enjolras ableist challenge

2023

Then one day he’ll just ask Courf and Combeferre “Do you think he knows I like him?” and they’ll be like ??? and Enjolras will just sigh like “I’ve been dropping hints for almost two weeks.”

“Enjolras, you held the door for him twice and let him win an argument once. And you didn’t glare when he interrupted you yesterday.”

“Yeah I know. He’s so oblivious.”

Secret agent Grantaire with his handler Enjolras, yes? YES.

Grantaire who is a very A+++ agent, but is always super uncomfortable on honeypot missions, because Enjolras always gets snappish in his ear whenever he has to seduce someone for reasons that he’s not sharing with Grantaire.

Grantaire who has Enjolras’ voice in his ear so often, that he sometimes just instinctively points something interesting out to Enjolras, and then gets disappointed when he remembers that he’s not on a mission, and Enjolras isn’t here with him.

Grantaire who is mildly claustrophobic, and tries not to get stuck in tiny spaces, but sometimes the job calls for it, and he crawls through air vents and stuff like that because he has to, and Enjolras will try to calm his nerves by reading out fun facts for Grantaire. 

Uhhh, maybe for security reasons, Grantaire has never seen Enjolras? And it doesn’t really sit well with Grantaire that he’s never seen Enjolras before, and that they could just pass each other on the street and Grantaire would literally just not know. And it becomes sort of a thing he’d do to try to hack into Enjolras’ file, much to Enjolras’ annoyance.

Being a politically aware and a diverse group of young people, not all the Amis have great relationships with their own parents. So, well, let’s just say that for a guy who only has one daughter, Jean Valjean gets one heck of a pile of Father’s Day cards every year.

Bahorel challenging Jean to wrestle with him whenever he sees him. Over and over again, and Bahorel always loses but keeps trying and is kind of offended that one time Valjean lets him win on purpose.

Jehan and Jean share a terrible fashion sense, they know it and they are proud of it. They take care of complimenting each other’s outfits and then snicker together when everyone else is irritated.

Jean Valjean once made the terrible mistake of saying something self-derogatory in presence of the Amis. From there on they made it their official mission to let him know that he is a good person. They joke about it, for example Courfeyrac makes vines in which he films Valjean doing something nice and comments sarcastically “Ugh, that Jean Valjean. Here he is baking cookies again. Disgusting” or “I truly hate that Valjean, look at him here planting vegetables with Prouvaire, he’s such an awful human being”.

Valjean once sees Grantaire painting, so he looks over his shoulder and notices that it’s a wonderful portrait. So Jean demands that R paints him a picture of Cosette to put on her wall, you know, what the heck, he should draw ten pictures while he’s at it! Valjean will pay well for each.

Jean Valjean is basically a honorary barricade boy.

Whenever Joly, Bossuet and/or Grantaire are drunk and they don’t know how they will get home, they can always call Valjean and he will find them and drive them home safely without judging them. One night when he was driving the three of them Joly threw up on his backseat (Valjean made them clean it up the next day) and more than once Grantaire has been so drunk that Valjean has taken him home with him and let him sleep it off on his couch. 

Jean Valjean will always listen to them. Even thought it’s an acknowledged fact among the Amis that Monsieur Jean is a middle-aged virgin who has never even dated anyone, they somehow always end up telling him about their crushes and heartaches. He’s also a great person to come out to. And after years of practicing with Cosette, his hugs are rare but pretty darn amazing.

Cosette sometimes reminds the other Amis that her papa really isn’t used to being loved or liked by so many people, and that they should try their best to show Valjean how much he means to all of them. They do. Valjean is overwhelmed but happy.

so @dotsayers and I have this au called the “enjolras the worst PTA parent ever” au and it’s just…incredible. 

basically enjolras gets kicked off his kid’s PTA for starting too many fights with the suburban mums so forms his own renegade group of parents, carers and education-associated-adults called “La Société Mère de l'école d'ABC” (or according to grantaire “the PTA rejects”) feat: 

jbm the poly parents who got in a fight with the school because they wouldn’t list all three as okay to pick up their son are the ones who initially bring up the idea of the rogue PTA

combeferre who teaches year two and disagrees with the curriculum but has had all his suggestions for change flat-out rejected

courfeyrac who teaches reception and has a deep hatred for the smarmy PTA mums so joined mostly out of spite (also partially because the cute librarian goes)

jehan who runs the community library that visits the school every week and joined because they got angry complaints from the PTA mums when they put books addressing lgbt+ themes into the library. they also possibly implied the Apology Brownies that they brought to a real PTA meeting for the parents in response were pot brownies (they weren’t, but it caused such a freak out that they got kicked out anyway)

feuilly the exhausted single dad who works like six jobs but also wants to fight for better resources for his kid

bahorel the gym teacher who’s just always down for #drama

éponine who’s always been treated like shit by the other parents because they think she’s a super young single mum. she’s not, gavroche is her brother, but that’s not the fucking point.

marius accidentally came to one of their meetings instead of the “official” PTA and was too embarrassed to quit when he realised and now he and cosette host every meeting

Enjolras who loves Grantaire back but believes so firmly in equal standing

Enjolras who can’t have a relationship with that kind of imbalance

Enjolras who’s not a god, Enjolras who’s just a man, Enjolras who believes that Grantaire is just as good as him no matter what he says

Enjolras who works and works and works until Grantaire, too, believes they’re equal

Enjoltaire that’s an actual healthy relationship, with communication and equal amounts of love on both ends and mutual adoration 

When Marius got home, Courfeyrac was waiting outside the door, leaning against the wall beside the door in a languid tangle of overlong limbs.

“Oh,” Marius said, surprised.

“I do know where you live,” Courfeyrac pointed out. Marius ducked his head, embarrassed, and nodded.

“Yes, of course,” he said. “I just thought– I don’t know. I– come in, if you’d like.”

He held open the door and Courfeyrac sauntered in and tossed his hat onto Marius’s bed. Marius watched him in nervous expectation, plainly wanting to ask something he was too timid to actually say. So instead, eventually, Courfeyrac said, “Combeferre has made us all feel that way at one time or another. You mustn’t take it personally.”

Marius flushed. “Thank you. I will not.”

Courfeyrac frowned. “I hope you do not think–” 

“Think what,” Marius said, too quickly. 

“–that that was some kind of test. That I brought you to meet my friends in hopes of seeing you embarrassed. I hope you do not think that of me!” he went on when Marius did not answer. “I cannot imagine the kind of man who would do something like that.”

My grandfather, Marius did not say. He did say, “No. I do not– I do not think that was your intent. Though I understand…”

“Understand what?” 

Marius shrugged. “If you… that is, our views…” He gestured vaguely, as if even he was not sure what he meant to say. At last he settled on: “It seems I am not really of the right persuasion to make one among your friends.” 

Courfeyrac looked genuinely startled, then broke into his usual half-teasing grin. “Really, Marius, the most shocking development of the day is to discover how low your estimation of my character really is. You think I cannot countenance having a friend whose opinions differ from mine? If you cannot tolerate my politics, then I understand and will leave you at once. But I make no quarrel with your opinions at all. I did not befriend you to indoctrinate you. I befriended to– well, to be your friend.”

Marius looked away and said nothing– could not speak. Courfeyrac laughed and clapped him on the back, tugged him close so their shoulders bumped together (or would have done if Courfeyrac’s shoulder were not significantly higher than Marius’s). 

“I will call on you tomorrow,” he said. “I’ve been promising to dine with Bossuet for a week now, and you will join us.”

Iiiii’m gonna go with highway man AU. Laigle resorts to some light highway robbery to try to save the family from ruin (again), but has the terrible bad luck to hold up Grantaire. Sure, his dad’s carriage is nice, but his pockets have more receipts for debts owed than coins.

There’s only one things for it, namely holding Grantaire for ransom to get some actual money out of this debacle. Grantaire is all in as soon as he hears there’s a scheme to get money out of his father, and he’s full of helpful capture and ransom tips.