ΠΑΝΤΑ ΡΕΙ

Kevan Lannister:

A perfectly fine name, aside from the small wrinkle that we mostly know him through his nieces and nephews. Therefore: Uncle Kevan.

Uncle Kevan should not fighting battles over the fate of Westeros. Uncle Kevan should be in an 80s sitcom.

Uncle Kevan should be at the sports bar, showing everyone pictures of his wife and his son Lance (who didn’t make quarterback this year either).

Gerion Lannister:

“Uncle Gery”

Jeremy Norridge:

Look, this one’s fully on me. There’s nothing wrong with the name Jeremy. Perfectly fine faux-medieval fantasy times name. It’s just…

Fallen hero of the war of the Rat, the Hawk, and the Pig, consort of the dragon prince Daeron, who so loved him that he gave up the great fleets of Redwyne to fight and perish at his side…

✨ Jeremy. ✨

(Why am I ok with Joffrey but not Jeremy? Is it just because there are no major character Jeremys? Do I know too many modern Jeremys and not enough historical ones?)

Gorman Peake:

Ok I guess this is a Gormanghast joke, so it gets a pass.

But Ser Eustance Osgrey DID tell me to remember the name and his friends DO call him Gormy. So as you can see it’s a lot to take in.

Jonothor “Jon” Darry:

I looked at the wiki and there are. 38. Named men called Jon. That’s not even counting the handful of Johns (with an h).

Then

There’s

Exactly

One

Jonothor

?????

JONOTHOR???