Tygercaine

short form writers look at people writing 100k+ fics as though this is some sort of talent given as part of a fae bargain, that the commitment required shows some sort of ungodly mental fortitude.

So from then on whenever one of us called something problematic, he would make us talk it out until we could name the “bad” thing we were hinting at. In this particular class, 7/10 it was some type of oppression, and the remainder was like, “I’m uncomfortable because this is very new/confusing/pushing boundaries that made me feel safe.”

Once we stopped calling things “problematic” and stopping at that, class got way more interesting and... we all had to say, like, “that’s racist” or “that’s misogynistic” or “ew capitalism gross” out loud, which a lot of us had never done in a classroom before. Or we had to be like, “Uhhh... I’m not sure what’s so bad?” and confront our own beliefs and that was maybe even more useful.

On Caradhras, Boromir carries Merry and Pippin while Aragorn carries Frodo and Sam;  Boromir trains Merry and Pippin to sword-fight; in Moria Frodo/Sam both call for Aragorn when they need help; on the stairs of Moria Boromir takes Merry and Pippin while Aragorn takes Frodo and Sam; when going down the Anduin Boromir goes with Merry and Pippin in a boat while Aragorn goes with Frodo and Sam; etc, etc, etc.

The big climactic payoffs to these relationships are Aragorn allowing Frodo/Sam to leave the Fellowship, and Boromir dying for Merry and Pippin.

Aragorn and Boromir must’ve had a conversation offscreen like “Ok here’s the plan: two hobbits each. We can’t separate Merry/Pippin or Frodo/Sam, so we’ll each take care of one Hobbit Duo.”

The reason Frodo/Sam were Aragorn’s hobbits is probably because the Fellowship didn’t trust Boromir to look after Frodo. Aragorn was better at resisting the Ring. 

But I also enjoy the idea that Aragorn was like “I want to look after the relatively laid-back and mature hobbits who take this quest completely seriously” and Boromir was like “I WANT THE HYPERACTIVE LITTLE BROTHER ONES”

 I also think it’s relevant that Aragorn and Boromir “switch hobbits” in the end.

After Gandalf’s death/as he loses hope, Boromir begins trying to reach out to Frodo.

The Twilight Zone, 1963, dir. David Lowell Rich

"Miss" means an unmarried woman. "Mrs." means a married woman. (both of these have origins in the word "mistress" as in "mistress of the house".)

I've had people (usually children) ask me at work if I'm a missus or a miss. I have replied that I am a miz, full stop. And when they pressed for which one I was REALLY, I have replied, "Why? Are you going to treat me differently depending on whether there's a ring somewhere?"

That's what Ms. is for. That is its linguistic function. It says, "This is an adult woman," and nothing else. Nothing else is necessary, and in my case, nothing else is desired.

I also use miz for other women unless and until they express a preference for something else because I don't magically know everyone else's marital status when I meet them. That's a courtesy—I'm declining to assume marital status and allowing them to decide whether they wish to declare it.

Because it is confusing. It would almost feel easier if there was no love there at all. But sometimes there was love. In the way they tried to protect you. In the sacrifices they made. In the ways they worried about you, cared for you, wanted a good life for you.

And at the same time, there were still things missing.

Maybe comfort did not come in the way you needed it to. Maybe your feelings were not always understood, or noticed, or handled gently. Maybe you learned to keep certain parts of yourself quiet because it felt easier than trying to explain them.

That kind of hurt is difficult because it does not always come from cruelty. Sometimes it comes from people who loved you deeply, but did not know how to emotionally connect in the ways you needed. People carrying their own wounds, limitations, fears, or ways of surviving.

And you are allowed to acknowledge both truths at once.

You are allowed to recognize their love and still grieve what you needed but did not receive. Those things do not cancel each other out.

Forgiveness, for a lot of people, is not pretending nothing hurt you. It is slowly accepting that someone can love you and still fall short of understanding you completely.

That does not make your pain dramatic. It does not make them monsters either. Sometimes it just means everyone was trying with the emotional tools they had, and some of those tools were not enough.

And I think many people quietly carry guilt for still feeling hurt by parents they know tried their best. But being loved imperfectly can still leave wounds. It makes sense that it affected you.

At the same time, you do not have to stay trapped only in anger forever either. Sometimes healing looks like understanding that your parents were human before they were parents. People shaped by their own experiences, their own upbringing, their own emotional gaps.

That understanding does not erase your feelings. It just softens the sharp edges around them a little.

You deserved emotional safety. You deserved gentleness. You deserved to feel understood, comforted, and emotionally close to the people raising you.

And if they could not fully give that to you, it is okay to mourn it.

But I hope you also know this: the love you needed is still something you can experience in your life. Through other people. Through chosen family. Through the way you learn to treat yourself now.

The story does not end at what you did or did not receive growing up.