gretty pirl

must a movie be good? is it not enough to see Jake Gyllenhaal, unhinged?

And maybe even his bootyass?

and maybe even his bootyass

‪I invite travel, paid creative opportunities, unexpected financial gifts, and aesthetically pleasing spaces into my life at this moment. ‬

Personally i went from “guess I’ll die” jokes to “IF I HAVE TO BE HERE FOR 5 MORE MINUTES I PROMISE YOU I WILL BUY JUST, AN ARRAY OF CLOTHES.” and other wild hyperbolic stuff. Just replace the death part with something ridiculous and off topic. Its very entertaining

This also works with calling myself things like stupid, worthless, trash, etc. Even if you do this jokingly to yourself, your brain still believes it, and keeps up the cycle. Seriously, I found that when I stopped saying these things about myself, even jokingly, it made a massive difference.

This is so important

sorry but i’m not gonna date someone i don’t find physically attractive in some way people keep acting like it’s shallow or superficial to say stuff like this but it’s important

oh to be a nun in 1350 enjoying quiet time and gardening and having lots of lesbian sex and then dying at the ripe old age of 36

Life expectancy statistics measure the average age of death. Because infant/childhood mortality was so incredibly high until recently, it really dragged down that average. If you exclude infant/childhood mortality from your statistic, you’ll see that humans (that survive childhood) have consistently lived into their 70s, meaning if you were a woman that survived childhood and never had to go through pregnancy, you may well get a good 50+ years of lesbian sex and gardening!

i get prettier every time a man disappoints me

You don’t want to be rich. You want to live freely.

That’s it

that’s it, man.

The idea of being super-rich actually scares me. I don’t want to be so empty inside that I spend my money on $30,000 ugly handbags and giant boats and shit. I just want to pay my bills without panic and support lots of charities.

And maybe go some places

Paris please wait for me.. and have my apartment ready with coffee and cream and warm baguette with butter melting slowly and contently. Have the swans still dipping their heads in the lakes and the lovers still kissing on the bench.

mom making fun of me bc she heard me talking to my cat. i was asking him if he had permission to be baby and asking for his permit and now i’m being bullied  

this little man does NOT have a baby license 

a24 can’t save you.. watch bon appetit

i SAID i wanna dance with somebody, i wanna feel the heat with somebody

what if 😱 we kissed 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩 at the area 51 raid 🥴👩‍🚀👽🥰

So I have a question for my followers: are there any conspiracy theories you’re 100% convinced are real

Canadian prime minister Justing Trudeau is the illegitimate son of the late Cuban dictator Fidel Castro

See, the nipples angle is just not something I would’ve thought to pursue

1000$ says his brother, who actually looks like his father Pierre, has pink nipples.

Do we have a picture of Fidel’s nipples? My searches have yielded fakes and forgeries.