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Gentleman's Embroidered Blue Silk Frock Coat, 1780s
From Kerry Taylor Auctions
Once I "made" a custom emoji for my mum by crudely drawing a hijab on it and now whenever she wants me to buy a coffee for her I get a text like this
absolutley enchanted by cobepee
sgjkdfjgmldfkgldf mgkdf gdf gfd when the handmaiden / feudal lord meme takes over your dashboard lmaooooooo
This is the night lesbian tumblr peaked
was this the beginning of people using heteronormative to mean “conventional gender roles” rather than what it actually means (the assumption that heterosexuality is the default)
was this the start of my nightmare
My child, who spends their entire life being transfered from home to car to school and back, and is not allowed to leave the house or talk to anyone and can only in their wildest dreams imagine a life free from constant surveillance, is very sad. Obviously they're dumb and lazy, like all kids these days.
kind of a tangent but i recently went to a bowling alley with my friend i'm 19 he's 18 and the woman at the door didn't want to let us in because there was a sign saying under-18s needed adult supervision. everything got cleared up and we were able to go bowl, but i'm still so mad about the fact that kids need adult supervision to go to a bowling alley and arcade. like okay maybe young kids should have supervision but what do you mean middle and high schoolers need to hold mommy's hand while they play video games. kids aren't just addicted to their phones because phones are addicting, we're addicted to our phones because there's nothing else to fucking do
I'm sure banning kids from online spaces while simultaneously not ensuring that they have access to offline spaces to socialize in (without having to rely on their parents who already don't have time for them) will help them feel better & less alienated from society.
As I said, one-and-three-quarter years ago:
If you're going to take away kids' smartphones, then give them back the streets.

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when i was a teenager i used to catch myself thinking "i'm really glad i'm alive right now because of all the cool personal technologies that exist" and when i did i'd think it through and reckon that well, its not like teenagers in the 70s and 80s knew they didnt have ipods or facebook or whatever. they were also happy with the tech they had. and i'd reason that in the future there would be more fun technologies that i dont know i'm missing out on right now and the future will be an even cooler time to exist
anyway i was dead fucking wrong about that last part. i hate personal technologies now. i miss having an ipod that doesnt advertise shit to me and i miss when my htc wildfire didnt harass me 45 times a day to install an ai assistant and then install it anyway when i say no and i miss when the internet wasnt 5 websites all of which i have to log into and i miss when i didnt need an app to talk to my landlord. sorry past me you were actually right about 2009
your government will collapse in less than a decade you genocidal monster
מישהו כאן בעד הממשלה? בהרמת יד
Americans all across the political spectrum are actually not normal about soooo many countries, it is insane.
Israel. This goes beyond saying but both left wingers and righ wingers are convinced that the country is some sort of demon incarnate, they are blaming it for anything ranging from ICE to the Spain migration crisis, to their own political polarization. Generally antisemetism has made people all across the spectrum very stupid. And even a lot of the American supporters of Israel are insane evangelicals that only support israel bcs of their bs fantasies of Armageddon. So yeah no one is normal abt that country
AMERICA ITSELF. I feel like a lot of the polarization in american politics is bcs american politics have become a reckoning abt the question ''is america good?''. And one side insists it is the best and most glorious country in the world that has been wronged by everyone while some (although not all and the problem isn't as big as it is on the american right) leftists insist that country is beyond redemption and has produced nothing good (Shocker: Saying a country is beyond redemption is literaly the most unhelpful thing if the goal is to make it better)
China. Sorry but we either have the Hasan Piker types that try to fetishize it, ignoring the oppresion of the Tibetans or the Uyghrus or the political repression in general, or we have people convinced of the fact that China is an evil hellhole ignoring the fact that in the last decades the standards of living for the averege chinese person have JUMPED. As much as I don't like the chinese government, ignoring that basic fact doesn;'t help anyone and it is just stupid. Similarly to how it is stupid for people to just rage abt how china wants to dominate over africa through economic programs while supporting the withdrawal of USAID that allows for US to compete with china. Gnerally, maybe treating a geopolitical rival as either a cartoon hero or a cartoon villain is a bad strategy.
Any country in Subsaharan africa. In which conservatives and right wingers will assume people there are stupid and backwards ignoring both colonialism and other objective geographical conditions that led to the underdevelopment and have nothing to do with their racist bs theories. And then left wingers will soooo often push some noble savage bullshit and be like ''ohhh it is so wholesome these people are in touch with nature and traditions'' ignoring the fact people in Kenya or Tanzania WANT to industrialize, WANT to become richer and that doesn't make them greedy. Neither is their poverty some sort of mroal virtue to be upkept.
BOTTOM LINE: PLS DON'T TREAT COUNTRIES LIKE CARTOONS I BEG YOU I BEG YOU .
one of my favorite this american life segments of late is about the people who played orchestra pit for phantom of the opera on broadway and how, like, a sizeable majority of them had literally been playing the show since it opened in 1988 (on broadway. I know it opened in 86 on the west end, you random pedants, but I am specifically talking about broadway musicians) because their contracts stipulated that they'd have jobs throughout the show's entire run... but nobody anticipated that phantom would become the longest-running broadway show of all time.
and none of these people wanted to walk away from a guaranteed job, so very few of them ever quit. they just kept doing the same show eight nights a week... for twenty or thirty years... and by the time it finally closed last year most of these musicians (who had been working together for DECADES) hated each other and really really fucking loathed phantom. I can't stop thinking about it. it's indescribably hellish to imagine but also the funniest thing I've ever heard in my life.
can you imagine.
[ID: excerpt from an article reading: One of my favorite stories, which should drive anyone who has every played in a band crazy-- there’s this bassoon player who has sat next to the same clarinet player since 1988. She’s convinced he plays half a note4 flat on every note he’s every played. He denies this. /]
Here's the link to the full transcript. An absolute goldmine. The section on Phantom of the Opera starts in Act 2.
Shofars:
Germany, 18th century. Inscribed in Hebrew on both sides: “When Abraham looked up, his eye fell upon a ram, caught in the thicket by its horns. So Abraham went and took the ram and offered it up as a burnt offering in place of his son” [Gen 22:13]
India, 20th century
Salonika, Greece, 19th-20th century

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Movement nudge! If possible, go out for some walkies!
god this tickles me
(OP's tiktok here)
I think one of the funniest abortion stances I've heard was from my parents neighbor. He's a like, hard-core libertarian viking larper guy who is very tall and very fat and very bald.
He believes a fetus is human with a soul, but also its "basically attacking the woman's body" so if she wants to get rid of it, that's "basically self-defense". He compared it to shooting a home invader. So he supports abortion not as healthcare, but as killing a baby in self-defense
Y'know I'm so glad someone reminded me of this. Because this was also discussed.
My stepmother did NOT like the way her Libertarian Viking Neighbor framed pregnancy as the fetus "attacking the woman". She incredulously told him this was extremely disrespectful to expectant mothers to portray pregnancy as so violent and negative.
Libertarian Viking Neighbor's response was that people consensually hurt each other all the time, and "there's like a whole community about that, with the acronym the one that starts with a B" And his reasoning was that if the mother was consenting to bring attacked by the baby, it in fact wasn't violent and negative because there was consent.
He brought up people consensually hurting each other, didn't go for one of the obvious answers like boxing or body mods or something, no he went STRAIGHT TO BDSM and he DIDN'T EVEN REMEMBER THE ACRONYM
Oh, i remember this! No truck fucking, but also hard to explain...?
Basically, a lot of truckers feel VERY attached to their trucks, to the point where it's common for truckers to refer to them as their "first baby".
So, knowing this, this trucker's wife organised a photoshoot where her husband's "first baby" got to meet his "second baby". Kind of like those pregnancy photoshoots with dogs?
He thought it was great, and they shared it on social media trucker groups. In a turn i would not expect, a lot of other truckers got really emotional about it. Like, grown men cooing over a stranger's pregnancy photoshoot, going to their wives and asking if they can do something similar 🥺🥺🥺. All in all, strangely wholesome???
Ohhhh, the truck is the big brother :)
Like showing your baby bump to the family pet 🥺

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at some point in your life you will be boiling fruit, water, sugar, and lemon juice in a pot to make a syrup or jam. the instructions will tell you to simmer for a certain amt of time. your timer will go off and you will look at the pot and go, "hm, this doesn't look thick enough. maybe i'll let it go for another 10 minutes." this is the devil speaking. it's only so liquid right now because it is at boiling point. it will thicken when it cools down. learn from the follies of my youth and do not let this happen to you
at some point in your life you will be making a sauce or a stew in which you need to add cornstarch to thicken it. and you will prepare a slurry of starch in cold water and think "this looks like way too little starch to thicken this amount of liquid." this is the devil speaking. cornstarch instantly polymerizes at 95°C and if you add too much it will turn into an impossibly thick goop.
at some point in your life you will be making some sort of cream based dessert that requires gelatin to thicken it. and you will soak some gelatin sheets in water and think "this is too few gelatin sheets for this amount of cream." this is the devil speaking. it will thicken in the fridge and if you add too much you will end up with milk jelly
at some point in your life you will be baking cookies. you will take the sheet out after twelve minutes as the recipe instructs and the cookies will still be glistening and soft. "these don't seem cooked enough," you will think to yourself, "i should place them back into the oven until their edges are nice and golden." this is the devil talking. this is how you get dry, overdone cookies. the cookies will continue to bake on the warm sheet for several more minutes and then harden up after sitting on a rack for a while. trust the process. trust the process.
at some point in your life you will be adding a small pasta to a soup and you will think "that is not enough small pasta." this is the devil talking. the pasta will absorb the stock and expand. this is how you end up with a soup that is a solid mass of soggy ditalini.
At some point in your life you will be adding garlic to a dish and you will think "that is not enough garlic." These are angels speaking. They are correct. Add more garlic.
At some point in your life you will be making caramel, and you will think "this seems kinda thick, I'll add in more cream" this is the devil talking. The caramel will thicken more as it cools. This is how you end up with caramel flavored soup. Dropping a small amount of caramel in a ice bath will show you how thick or thin it really is. Trust the process.
Calvin really was the voice of his generation. His generation just doesn’t like to admit it.