we are going to be friends (threat) (promise)
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$LAYYYTER
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
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noise dept.
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@thoughtfulraven
we are going to be friends (threat) (promise)

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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loungetoy on twitter
such a handsome strain of koi!
*shoves one of these raccoons into a sack in a cruel and ultimately misguided attempt to destroy the moon and depower the ocean*
NO
(guy who doesnt even like dating) ok well does anyone want to get entranced by my whole deal or no.
was on the wikipedia page for charleston red rice and i noticed the photo they used was blurry. i went to the talk page to see if this was brought up and stumbled upon this banger of a conversation
This post is a safe place to lay your egg

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this is my life philosophy
Writing another weird short story that will demonstrate once again that there is something deeply wrong with me
this pic by @omagpies of mb's Club Fit (as featured in spark by @mimsiical ) has utterly bewitched me. ....call that shit fruit leather
just a heads up. im gonna do a big curse soon
okay so honestly i wasn’t expecting they’d be able to hide the body for this long
LINDSEY GRAHAM ?
Disney is doing crazy things in the japanese mobile game sphere rn
you may be familiar with disney twisted wonderland, the gacha game in which various disney villains are used as direct inspiration for handsome anime boys. well that game was so successful that disney is trying to do it again but this time they're just animeboyifying whatever
here's mickey, goofy, donald, and chip & dale. yeah they turned mickey & friends into anime boys. they're an idol unit or something. they're technically not anime boy versions of the source characters, they have different names. mickey's guy is "Neo Michel". not michael, michel, like he's french. chip & dale are "Ruska Moncrief" and "Ranka Monk", they have different last names, they're not brothers anymore so that they can be yaoibait instead, anyways this post isn't actually about these guys I'm just setting the stage for the actual humanizations I wanted to show you
They also did monsters inc. And. Well it's obvious from the designs who mike and sully are. but you will also notice. the blonde one on the left. with glasses. monsters inc is kind of famously about just the two guys so they didn't really have a lot of other non-villain characters to take anime boys inspiration from, I guess, so, well,
Yeah it's her. they made an anime boy version of the mean receptionist slug. her name is roz btw, as all of boygachagame twitter has become extremely aware of in the past 3 days as we speculated prior to the release of the full image who tf the third guy was. the anime boy's name is "noah slugger". at this point no parody of the types of things gacha games will make gijinkas of will ever be able to live up to what disney is officially spending their own real money on designing

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Source
It’s finally happened.
After almost a decade on this site, I found another Tumblr user in the wild. I stopped to tie my shoe with rainbow laces this morning outside the silversmith at Colonial Williamsburg, and I heard it.
“I like your shoelaces.”
Oh. Oh no.
I responded the only way I could. “Thanks.” And then I reluctantly added, “I stole them from the president…and if that makes sense to you, I’m very sorry.”
The poor man, in full Colonial dress, stared at me for a long moment. And then burst into laughter. And said, “I haven’t thought about that in YEARS and this has never happened to me before.”
Yeah. Me neither. Not until today.
Tumblr rite of passage. Achievement unlocked.
@victoriansecret I found your friend!!!
Found my 53yo very-much-not-online father in the kitchen today meticulously arranging cutlery on the countertop and i was like 'what are you doing' and he looked up at me with the world's most shit-eating grin and said "Your mother told me this is how you rick-roll the Youth" and i looked over and it was fucking. Loss.jpg.
i must stress that he's never seen the original comic. My mother simply showed him the shorthand symbol and he memorized it. As far as he is aware this is just a fucking hieroglyph that deals instant psychic damage to everyone under the age of 30

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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i’m screaming
I don’t think this woman is straight anymore.
Yall are missing the best fucking part
This is my new favourite post on tumblr, bye
you ever notice that practical styles and wearable objects are consistently marked as uncool
everything from tying a sweater around your waist to eyeglass chains
Wait wearing a sweater around your waist was uncool? Damn I been doing that with my flannels for years. I haven't been wearing my eyeglass chain for a couple years since I've got prescription safety glasses for work now though.
...maybe I do hit the unhip dad stereotype harder than I thought.