a god lives under my house; a dragon in it

Murderbot in Exit Strategy vs ART in Network Effect

It was already gone

As chunks of stone hit the floor, Three leapt back to me and grabbed me around the waist.

It said, “Please hold on. I will—”

“I know!” I yelled and grabbed it around the shoulders. “Just go!”

the clearest example of this is murderbot 2.0. when it loses access to the handful of its memories and files it was deployed with, it almost instantly starts diverging from 1.0! AND those more coherent than I have made many delicious posts about how 2.0's memories are fairly recent and also not woven in with the complexity of organic neural tissue that can't have complete memory wipes and so retains stress responses to trauma that mb partially/doesn't remember. 2.0 being relieved from the memories of that trauma, both digital and organic, make it react and work and interact in completely different ways from 1.0

that of course is the biggest piece of it! but we also see a lot of the absolute horror that is not having access to your memories, and thus a part of your very personhood. ART emotionally breaks down when it realizes the extent of its memory disruption because it can't trust itself to BE itself at that point. murderbot has a similar fear earlier when it first sees ART from the outside and it thinks it can't trust its memorybanks. we definitely see it scared, disconcerted, and uncomfortable a lot through the book (and all of the books. great series for watching a protagonist be scared, disconcerted, and uncomfortable honestly. 10/10), but that scene struck me as particularly overwhelming for mb, particularly when held up with its FIRST meeting with ART (I don't have the book on hand right now, but its initial fear of ART was based on how important being in control of its own head is to it). eletra's struggle with her memory loss acts as a constant backdrop of "hey!! memories are key to who you are as a person!! losing them would be really fucked up wouldn't it!! WOULDN'T IT"

Murderbot gets the humans to call it SecUnit. It doesn't want to become any more like a human ("That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard"). It only pretends to be an augmented human when being identified as a (rogue) SecUnit poses a risk to itself and others around it.

So, one might think Murderbot is ok to be seen as a SecUnit as long as it is not dangerous for it and its humans.

But it's actually not so simple. Most humans, especially those from the CR don't consider SecUnits as having any sort of feelings or independent thoughts. (Even humans get their feelings ignored after all.) Muderbot certainly does not like being treated as a SecUnit in the way it had been treated before it met Mensah and PresAux humans.

It's interesting that ART gets this, and that it cares.

In Network Effect, when Arada is to go and meet Leonide in the B-E transport, Murderbot suggests that it goes as a SecUnit specially deployed to protect the university humans. But ART is silently listening to the plans, then,

ART said, I would prefer you go as an augmented human.

At which Murderbot brisles, thinking that it's second-guessing its plan. But ART says nothing further and helps Murderbot flatten its hair to make it look more like a standard SecUnit.

Since ART had apparently decided to be helpful and stop sulking like a giant angry baby, I said, “Why do you want me to pretend to be an augmented human? This way is easier.”

You don’t like it, ART said.

“That’s my problem.” I didn’t like it. But if you put everything that had happened to me on a scale of awfulness and assigned exact values to each incident (…), was in the lower third of the chart.

(…)

When my crew is at risk, it’s my problem, ART said.

This is very caring coming from ART who seems generally very logical. As Murderbot says, it's tactically easier for it to go as a SecUnit than pretending to be an augmented human. But ART knows how the B-E humans would react to it once they realise it's a SecUnit. ART cares more about how SecUnit might be treated, reminding it of how SecUnits are always treated than if it is tactically simpler.

Perhaps, ART also knows what it's like to be treated as less than what it really is, while pretending to be a bot pilot. And with SecUnits the experience is a lot worse.

In a way, ART's concern is similar to Ratthi shouting "It is a person!" over the comm loudspeaker earlier during the hostage situation. He couldn't let Target Leader comment "Why does it look like a person?", without teaching him that. That scene was somewhat comical, but it actually shows how Ratthi is truly Murderbot's friend who understands it (putting aside the timing...)

ART basically saying there that it considers Murderbot as its crew - and Murderbot knows how much ART loves and cares about its crew - is a sigifnicant admission. It didn't just kidnap Murderbot to use it a highly competent tool to find its human crew. It deeply cares about Murderbot.

In turn, Murderbot says in its diary,

It (= the uniform ART had just made for it) had ART’s crew logo on the jacket, but somehow that didn’t bother me as much as usual.

Considering how many times Murderbot had expressed its very strong dislike for logos earlier in the story, this it quite significant, too. The Perihelion logo doesn't state ownership. It's more of a sign of spontaneous agreement to join the team.

overse is just....... sooo in tune with undercurrents. in fact, i think murderbot talks about her in its diary comparatively very little almost because she's operating at a level of intuition that it's wholly unfamiliar with, very different from its own very finely calibrated intuition that humans can't experience. and yet still, she's not baffling to it. she's a shining example that sensitivity doesn't have to take back seat to stoicism to be valuable in a crisis to her loved ones and the team. she's reliable and reassuring to have around bc she can assess and communicate what others can't

arada is so gentle, but she's so willing to do the right thing that she is willing to act hard. she's willing to do her best at competing with CR values, doing her best to absorb coaching and following others' lead. to murderbot, that's so invaluable - to see that cruelty can be that level of foreign to someone. taking all her softness into account, what's especially wonderful is that arada is still a capable and firm leader bc she recognizes the value of leadership. it's an uncomfortable process of growth she's still going through, but unlike having to pretend to be CR-cutthroat, she isn't shying from leadership bc she knows leadership can't be pretend. it can be difficult, but it is what gets things done and keeps her people safe so she has to step into it and learn it for real

and both of these women love one another!

how beautiful!

how soft!