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You may call me Think-Queer or TQ/ThinkQ for short or if you're uncomfortable with the word queer.â
Replies and asks will come from @thinkqueer since this is a sideblog.â
I am a Queer, Neurodivergent, Trans, Disabled, Mid 20's, Dyslexic, Unaligned Enbyâ
I block people who I feel are unable or unwilling to engage in conversation without breaking my boundaries or being blatantly disrespectful. If I've blocked you it doesn't mean that you've "won" an argument, it just means I don't want to engage with you any longer.
I also block people preemptively. If Iâve seen you sharing bigoted beliefs or engaging in harassment then I will block you without interacting. There are plenty of resources that you can use to educate yourself, I see no reason to engage with hateful people.
I am fine with NSFW accounts following me, but if your blog is nothing but porn I will assume youâre a bot and block you.
I'm comfortable with any pronouns except she/her, he/him, or it/it's. If you use she/he/it pronouns for me repeatedly or in a manner that seems purposeful then I'll probably block you. It isn't triggering, it's just a sign that you don't have any respect for me and I have no interest in engaging with someone like that.
I am very strongly against false or baseless accusations of pedophilia. For more information please see this post.
For more information about this blog:
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â Numbers correlate to paragraphs with more information on the boundaries page. I didnât want to make this pinned post too long so I moved extra information to that page.
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we're moving to an internet where children would be banned from reaching out for help and friendship online but abusive parents can post their children's every second online to humiliate and expose them for money with no pushback
When the health food store unionized, something wild happened that I thought was just a goofy one-off, but makes more sense now.
There was a big push to eliminate "degrading jobs" but the strategy was to eliminate the position, then create a new position outside of the bargaining unit to do the work. So like, we wouldn't have dishwashers, but we'd have people who washed dishes that weren't eligible to be in the union.
I was like A) what the actual fuck? Dish washing isn't "degrading", it's fucking vital. B) What the actual fuck? You want to create a union just to exploit different people?
There were enough of us to be like "Absolutely the fuck not," and put a stop to it, but I was absolutely flummoxed that people involved in a union would say that out loud. Working with more leftists now, it makes sense.
I think it was coming from a background that viewed labor as necessary to accomplish anything, but advocated for the equitable distribution of the gains made by labor... and then being thrown in with people who just thought labor was icky.
The first time someone told me that busing tables was "degrading", I was like "Oh, uhh, yeah, like it's very necessary work but under compensated for how vital it is?" and they responded "No, touching plates that other people have eaten off of is disgusting."
But I want to eat off of clean plates. So somebody is going to have to touch/clean those plates. And I respect that person and want them to be able to afford to live.
In bargaining, someone on the Union side suggested that we eliminate all the cashiers and exclusively use self-checkouts (they were a cashier and didn't like it). The organizer told them that the union wasn't in the habit of eliminating bargaining unit positions. (This is the same person I've talked about how said that "as a prison abolitionist" we just needed to execute most criminals.)
When I explained holiday scheduling (time off requests granted in order of seniority, shifts assigned in reverse order of seniority). Someone was angry and said that time off requests potentially being denied "wasn't in the spirit of the union". When I pointed out that our departments made like 30% of our annual revenue between Thanksgiving and New Years and that required production staff to be working, they said that we just needed to create a class of positions ineligible for the bargaining unit that wouldn't be able to request time off. (Which again, most of us figured we'd just rotate holidays or something, but assumed that some holiday production was mandatory.)
I was on leftie tiktok (as a creator) for a bit and I saw this attitude there as well. I specifically remember one argument around cleaners where someone said that employing a cleaner was, like, ethically bad, and that "after the revolution" we wouldn't have cleaners.
It got me thinking, along with Ann Russell talking about how to treat cleaners (being a cleaner herself), about how we conceptualise domestic service as particularly degrading in all its forms, when, really, why is that? Why is paying someone to do something intrinsically bad?
Like, even in a moneyless, gift economy society, there would still be people whose primary contribution to their communities would be cleaning. Some people like to clean, and are really rather good at it.
I've talked ad nauseam in the past about how British attitudes towards cleaners and other service based positions today are the descendants of Victorian attitudes. That is, both the attitudes of conservatives and many progressives of that time. The trade union movement was particularly exclusionary towards service workers.
I think people on the left thinking about forms of labour can sometimes be worse than people on the right. People who have taken these positions generally just conceptualise them as something you need to do to get by, and there are particular employers where these positions are degrading but in general the jobs themselves aren't.
Yeah, that really sums it up. There's stuff that needs to get done, so I'll never be of the opinion that it's degrading work. I worked in kitchens for a long time, and every other position is reliant on having clean dishes, so nobody can really be "above" washing dishes. The shitty thing about washing dishes or busing tables is how people treat the people doing it. The work itself is vital.
And some of those jobs are like, sure, you can throw almost any warm body at it and get it done adequately, but you still run into people where you're like "Holy shit, you're good at this."
People doing a job most people don't want to do should be paid MORE in order to get people to do it. That's how it would work if we weren't mired in a schema assuming that less-frequently-desired jobs are the province of people who "can't do better" and "deserve" poverty because they have less value as people.
Peer reviewing the tags: #these attitudes are also why ppl are weird about sex work#and weirdly enough visibly disabled people working - like esp thinking of like#places that employ ppl w LDs as workers and volunteers#what they FEEL is 'these people make me uncomfortable'#and they say 'they shouldn't have to do that'#so the solution is. no visibly disabled people getting to work#the fact that. they want to work. and want jobs#is irrelevant#too many people base their politics off their like. gut feelings of discomfort and unease#which are completely disconnected from both practicality and actual morality
the minute someone is noticeably psychotic people's social skills fly out the window because they don't see psychotic people as people
"what do I do if I shouldn't call 911?"
well "I'm sorry I'm in a rush" is a pretty good option or "I can't talk right now, sorry" and then move on.
psychotic people, ultimately, are people. they are just as human as you are and the vast vast vast majority of the time they're not interested in hurting you.
when you're approached by a psychotic person ranting about delusions or hallucinations (and possibly speaking with disorganized speech) they are just looking for human connection, that's all. they might not have many people around to talk to and it gets lonely. when someone talks to you about a secret society of mind readers out to kill them they are just trying to connect with people and sometimes process the fear they're experiencing (because a secret society of mind readers out to kill you is rather scary!)
things like mania can also make you very talkative and very social.
someone coming up to you to talk about being the second coming of Jesus isn't trying to hurt you. they just want to talk. if you have time then have a conversation, most of the time you don't even need to say much. you can politely nod and go "wow that's crazy" and "that's so scary" and it might be one of the kindest things someone does for them that day. if you don't have time just say you're in a rush and leave.
everyone loves to think of suicidality as this dramatic emergency, but for the chronically suicidal, it just... isn't. it's a regular, often daily part of life. how would you feel if you were told you're not allowed to talk about or mention something that for you is just another tuesday? it'd be pretty frustrating, right?
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it's ironic that ableds love using disabled people for inspiration porn but hate actually giving the vast majority of disabled people the tools and accommodation to facilitate disabled people doing more with their time. it's almost like the point of it isn't to inspire but to create a false narrative that disability can be overcome with strength of will because look at these people who did it! now stop asking for help
I have come across several blogs of people (especially transfems) who stated that trans men, transmascs or nonbinary people are not disproportionally marked unfriendly with the shinigami eye extension. I've seen someone even say that it's transmisogynistic to call it out.
Yet, I've come across this, side by side in broad daylight. The pink censored name is a random post and I censored the green one because I do not want anyone giving this person anymore attention.
The green "trans-friendly" post was made by a transmedical trans woman who has also made extremely horrible posts on nonbinary people, trans men and transmascs. A large number of her post targets specifically individuals who are AFAB for existing as AFAB trans folks, and she at times uses transmisogyny to excuse her behaviour. Her blog is clearly unsafe to most if not all, yet she was marked trans friendly.
The post on the right was made by a nonbinary person. I left them uncensored because their blog looks really cool and I think people should check them out. Their blog looks safe and alright yet it's marked unsafe.
And this is not the first time I've seen this. I have seen blogs by vile people who have straight up wished death on a whole group of people, talk smack about others in the commuity, and hold very horrible views but are marked trans friendly, and I've seen many get marked unfriendly because they bring up things like transandrophobia, exist as intersex, or heck, they criticized shinigami eye. Actual transphobes and TERFs are marked but then I've seen that most transfemmes I come across are marked green regardless of what they say for the most part, unless they criticize other transfemmes the they're marked red. Meanwhile, a LOT of trans men, intersex, and nonbinary people are marked red, but if they 100% agree at their own expense then they are marked green.
This is why I don't trust this extension. Word of advice, rather than assuming right off the bat that the person is safe or not safe, actually check the blog. When I see someone marked red, I check their blog for myself to be sure. And when I see someone marked green, I'm still wary till I check.
This extension doesn't help trans people feel safe, it only helps specific transfemmes feel safe from literally everyone else, even when they are unsafe to others.
Did y'all know that you can express you aren't comfortable with children, and don't ever plan on having kids w/o sharing how much you hate a whole group of human beings?
hey. you have to love your trans brothers of color okay. and your trans sisters of color. and your nonbinary siblings of color. you have to okay. its simply non-optional
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begging everyone to remember exorsexism is a term and we canât divide everything into transfem transmisogyny and transmasc transandrophobia. Saw an attack helicopter joke called just transandrophobia. What are we doing here chat
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
i need people to get so serious about the fact that exorsexism has always been the biggest red flag for reactionary bullshit in the trans community. exorsexism is how the trans bar becomes the transmed bar becomes the log cabin republican bar if you catch my drift. exorsexism is literally always at the scene of the crime and NO ONE ever fucking talks about it and then you have major voices like Jules Gill-Peterson & so many others who insist on this narrative that nonbinary & genderqueer people are this bourgeois secret society sneering down at the poor binary trans people and calling them boring and regressive and throwing tomatoes at their HRT (which we never take).
sorry saw red a little bit there. my point is that nonbinary & genderqueer people are not and have never been peripheral to the trans community or trans activism & i need everyone to start taking misandrogyny and exorsexism so deathly serious or we are fucked.
I bring an "if neo-Nazis feel welcome in your political movement then you need to take action in removing them from your spaces rather than just vaguely condemning them" vibe to the conversation that both the pro-Palestine, anti-Zionist left and the ultranationalist, populist right don't seem to like
there is a very real tendency of teenagers with anxiety disorders self diagnosing with considerably more stigmatized and impairing mental illnesses (e.g. schizophrenia, DID, personality disorders), but the best response to that isn't to get angry with them for "appropriating" lol. instead you show them coping resources for the problems they're actually having and deemphasize diagnostic categories in general. if an 18 year old is claiming to have alzheimer's, they're probably making an innocent mistake and are in genuine distress. be kind.
Also I think this trend comes, at least in part, from how brushed aside anxiety disorders can be. If your parents and teachers dismiss you with 'oh everyone feels anxious', then inevitably you're going to start thinking that there must be something else going on with you
âYou must feel very scared right now; letâs talk about how to help you personally, tailored to your symptomsâ will always be more helpful than âstop faking (X) for attentionâ. If theyre that desperate for attention or an explanation, something is wrong.
I wish more people got this because some âlow-empathyâ people are the most compassionate and sympathetic in the universe, and I hate it when thatâs taken to mean âunfeeling and probably hostileâ when nothing could be further from the truth
Posts like this make me feel so much better. It always seems like society treat responses to others pain as though empathy is the most important kind. I am around 85% compassionate and this post helped me not feel like I am a monster because of that for once.
Wild animals don't commit murder. A wild animal killing a dog or cat is not an animal committing murder, it's an animal engaging in its natural instincts and finding food. A wild animal does not know or care that its prey is someone's dearly loved pet, it is just hunting the same way it would hunt for a rabbit or squirrel. There is nothing malicious about a coyote eating a cat or a cougar eating a dog; it's just nature that happens to affect people more closely.
It is devastating to lose a pet that way, but there are precautions you can take and at the end of the day, you cannot hate an animal for just doing what it needs to do in its own home. You have to remember that these are creatures choosing between starvation and survival; your feelings don't factor into that. Take as many precautions against wild animals as you can, including doing basics like keeping your cats inside and not letting your dog out unattended especially at night, but don't hate an animal just for trying its best to survive. They were here first and your home and fences are just another obstacle to finding food to them, no different from a river or bramble patch. If you want less wild animals attacking pets, then support efforts to revitalize local ecosystems so that they have an abundance of natural prey and don't feel the need to enter towns.
I'll go even further, no animal is capable of committing murder. Yes it is always super tragic when a pet dog kills a pet cat or another pet dog, when a cat kills another cat, when a pet dog or cat kills a smaller household pet, but calling it murder and acting like the attacking animal in question "knows better" is ridiculous. They're non-human animals.
Is it traumatic? Yes! Is it sad? Yes! Is the animal that attacked a murderer, and is that non human animal on the same level as a human who commits these acts? No.
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one of the weird things about being adopted and abused by your adopted family is that literally everyone thinks that adoptive parents are doing their adopted child a favor by "saving them from a bad situation" and that they cant be abusive and if they are then itd be worse if we were with our bio families. when like actually i was adopted at 3 days old, i was never abused by my bio mom (i didnt have time to be), and they only adopted because my mom is sterile. like its glorified infant trafficking basically theyre not saints. they didnt save me from anything in fact theyre the ones who put me in the bad situation. they ARE the bad situation
Transphobia is about to be signed into law in the UK. We can fight this.
I am begging the UK trans community and its allies to attend the Mass Lobby at Parliament on June 25th, 11am-4pm, organised by Trans Solidarity Alliance.
Last year we broke the record for an LGBT+ mass lobby of Parliament. Will you help us break it again? Join us on 25th June 2026 to demand be
The new EHRC Code of Practice pushes trans people out of toilets, hospital wards, and community spaces. It normalises gender policing based on appearance and stereotypes. It becomes statutory guidance in the UK by the end of June.
Trans people are now legally their assigned gender at birth and must join gendered spaces accordingly, but if they are perceived as their lived gender, they can also be ejected from those spaces. The guidance says: either break the law, or donât pass too well.
A mass lobby is where you invite your MP to discuss your concerns with you in-person. Ask your MP to:
Demand full parliamentary scrutiny, debate, and use their free vote on the EHRC Code of Practice.
Support any motions rejecting the EHRC guidance. As of June 4th, Labour MP Nadia Whittome has submitted a prayer motion - Early Day Motion 240.
Write to Bridget Phillipson, the Minister for Women and Equalities about our concerns
Your MP does not have to be an ally, they do not have to respond to your email for you to show up and greencard them (details below the cut.) What matters is that as many people as possible show up.
I cannot stress this enough: Showing up in person matters. It is much more effective than petitions, emails, and letters.
It is a horrible, stressful time, and I am so sorry if you're trans and live in the UK. But I was at last year's mass lobby and the line for greencarding alone stretched around the back gates. It was a record breaking mass lobby and made us impossible to ignore. Let's do even better this time. Details under the cut:
Worried about what to say?
Bring your personal worries about transphobia being signed into law, and trans friends being excluded from public spaces. You are a living person who deserves dignity. Remind your MP of that. You will also get guidance and brochures from Trans Solidarity Alliance that outlines our demands. This is mine from last year.
Money issues?
Trans Solidarity Alliance provides a travel bursary that you can sign up for via the link.
Got a refusal or no response from your MP?Â
Come anyway! You can request a same-day appointment with your MP through a process called greencarding. They will come and see you if theyâre already in Parliament. Even if they donât, theyâre made acutely aware of your cause because you showed up in person. This is my greencard from last year.
Here is the EHRC Code of Practice in full. It's a tough read, but some highlights are:
Organisations canât provide trans-inclusive, single-sex services, or they risk being sued for discrimination.
e.g. domestic violence support for women including trans women, menâs rugby group including trans men (12.68).
Trans people will have nowhere safe to pee.
If youâre a trans man, businesses can't allow you to pee in the men's, and you can also be ejected from womenâs bathrooms if youâre perceived as a man. Vice versa for trans women. EHRC suggests a âthird spaceâ bathroom, which is discriminatory and unworkable for most businesses. (13.130-133)
Sports organisations must exclude trans people from single-sex competitions (13.73).Â
A womenâs only sports competition must exclude trans women because of their biological advantage or face potential lawsuits (13.74), but a trans man who has undergone testosterone treatment can also be excluded based on fairness rules (13.81).
Trans women are stripped of the legal definition of âlesbianâ, and therefore no longer have legal protections if theyâre discriminated against on the basis of sexual orientation. (2.50, 2.92).
Here is the Good Law Project's better explanation of the EHRC Code.
I have also made a PDF printout of QR codes for the government petition, email your MP tool, and mass lobby link to pass around your communities. DM me and I'll send it to you.
