He doesn't like hugs.
YOU ARE THE REASON

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@thetranslucentwallaby
He doesn't like hugs.

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In the vein of Ocean's Eleven and Blake's 7 and all those numerical titles, may I present to you my new heist crew:
Baker's Dozen
(there are thirteen of them)
@onaslansside SKLHLSHLDHL THIS WINS
"i would kill a pedophile to protect my child" ok but would you teach your child how to say no? even to adults? even to adults you like? would you teach your child the words "penis" and "vulva" and then use them? would you let them ask questions about their body? would you answer them honestly? would you learn how to cope with your feelings when you talk about human bodies, so they don't feel ashamed? would you set a positive example for how you talk about your body? would you tell your child they don't have to hug or kiss anyone? would you tell your family the same? would you stand by them when they refuse to hug someone? even someone you know has never done anything to hurt them? would you let your child avoid food they don't like? would you let you child avoid people they don't like? would you believe them? would you sit in the discomfort of not knowing all the answers and not take it out on them? would you love your child the same if someone did hurt them? would you make them feel valued just as they are? would you let them talk to doctors or nurses in private? would you let them express their feelings? would you show interest in their life? would you let your child say no to you? would you help your child feel safe coming to you when they make a mistake? would you apologize to your child? would you believe them? would you put aside your anger to focus on what would make your child feel safe and loved? would you put your ego aside for your child? would you take your child's concerns seriously? would you listen to your child? would you believe them?
I would both do all those things AND kill a pedo to protect my child, if I had to.
Yesss
i'm gonna add this comment by @papercrane:
"Maya angelou's family killed a pedophile that raped her, and that just traumatized her more. "I thought that I had caused the manâs death, because I had spoken his name. That was my seven-and-a-half-year logic. So I stopped talking for five years." Read I know why the caged bird sings."
and here is my comment:
the fantasy of killing a pedophile to defend your child is... an escape from reality. as with all fantasies where a single act of violence stands for a lifetime of effortful care. it lets us off the hook for the day to day labor of actually protecting the human beings around us. it gives us an excuse to look away from what abuse actually looks like.
it allows us to ignore that setting boundaries is a daily practice. it allows us to ignore the subtle ways in which we punish children for having boundaries. it allows us not to think about things we can do, the effort we can put in, in smaller repeated ways, to be kind and caring. to be safe to talk to.
it is a grand gesture that, were you to actually go through with it, would neither prevent the harm that you fear nor help your child to heal from it. it is an idea with no bearing on reality for 99.99% of people, while rape and abuse are a reality for a large fraction of people.
it is not useful to imagine killing a pedophile. it is not useful to claim you would kill a pedophile. it wouldn't be useful to actually attempt to kill a pedophile in almost any situation.
it is useful to think about how you can help your child know they can get help. they can say no. they can tell adults to stop. they deserve to be comfortable. they deserve to be informed.
the entire point of the post is that your child will not be saved by your imagined wrath. the entire point is that your day to day actions, and your attitude towards children as people, are more impactful to your child's well-being. far more realistic. more important.
not least because your child doesn't need you to be wrathful. they need your love. they need care. they need attention.
meanwhile, the public performance of wanting to kill child abusers doesn't do anything to child abusers. most child abusers believe they are doing the right thing for their children.
saying you want to kill abusers doesn't signal anything good to children, either. as others have said, it makes children more afraid to speak up and ask for help. that might be their mom, their coach, their troop leader. it gives those abusers leverage; the children cannot tell if they want things to be stable.
and it makes it harder for adults to BELIEVE children, too! because if their child was really abused, then they've staked their honor on committing that violence, even if it was against their brother or spouse or grandpa or pastor or neighbor or their other kid's favorite babysitter. and if they don't want to do that, well... then they must decide whether they believe completely their child, or whether their child's boundaries must really be respected, or... if maybe it's impossible to know.
how many abuse survivors have tried to disclose, only to be told that so-and-so wouldn't do that, or they didn't mean it, because so-and-so loves you and we all like so-and-so. this dichotomy goes both ways, psychologically. if a child abuser is entirely evil and has to be killed, then someone who's not entirely evil and i don't want to kill can't be a child abuser. this must be something else. there must be a mistake.
you can not adequately protect your children from abuse if you hold on to this idea. i am telling you. your insistence that killing pedophiles will protect your children is holding you back. it is not useful. it is not cute to talk about how much you want to do a single act of violence to abusers as if that would ever be enough to outrun the culture of abuse and the dehumanization of children in our society. you cannot cling to this like a talisman that would ward off any harm your children may come to. you cannot escape reality by telling yourself you'd be a total badass and kill that bad guy dead. this is not helpful.
one of my favorite bits in lord of the rings is something the movies didn't really try to do because it's entirely internal, but sam's carrying the ring and it starts trying to do its work on him, so he's having these intrusive visions of himself marching at the head of a vast and terrible army, and he just starts laughing because, me? samwise gamgee? sam gamgee the general sam gamgee the dark lord are you for real? man i just want to go home and do some gardening. and the ring gets frustrated and it starts trying to figure out other stuff that would actually tempt sam and it's finally like, okay, but hear me out: imagine if you could have...A REALLY REALLY BIG GARDEN
and then he's like, i don't know that sounds like a lot more work than a regular garden actually. why don't we just get on with finding mister frodo
The last time I went to the aquarium there was a young couple (very affectionate) there on a date. The girl had on black lipstick, a corset, a flared tutu-style black skirt, fishnets, combat boots, and was carrying a black heart-shaped purse with a silver jack-o-lantern face design on it. The guy had on jeans, a denim shirt, cowboy boots, and a cowboy hat. Peace and love on planet earth.

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tragedy protagonist categories:
yknow what yeah I think that's just about how anyone would react in this situation. fair enough.
alright this isn't how just Anyone would behave in this situation but I'm humble enough to admit that there have been times in my life when I was doing badly enough that I'd probably also fumble it like this
babygirl what the hell are you even doing
thank you hamlet prince of denmark for being the character ever for the 437th year in a row
Astronauts are so funny man. Here's just a couple of things I've found hilarious from this past week of space stuff:
It's probably already been spread around here enough already, but in case anyone's missed it; 7 hours after launch, commander Reid Wiseman, dealing with tech issues, uttered the generational quote "I have two Microsoft Outlooks and neither one of those are working."
After fixing the issues that were afflicting the onboard toilet, mission specialist Christina Koch (who has quickly become my favourite of the four) laughingly said âIâm the space plumber, Iâm proud to call myself the space plumber.â
On Easter Sunday, the Artemis II crew hosted a makeshift egg hunt, by hiding packets of dehydrated scrambled eggs around their Orion capsule.
The way the crew always makes sure to make it very clear they're in space when doing interviews. From stuff like Wiseman just hanging out floating sideways on screen or Koch letting her hair loose so it can freely span out flowing around her.
While in transit, the crew decided to record a parody of those bad 80s sitcom intros where everyone turns and smiles at the camera.
When the crew reached the furthest point from Earth in the mission, they jokingly clambored over each other in an effort to get to the far side of the capsule, so that they could individually claim to be the furthest person from earth.
At the same time, on the ISS which was at the time on the other side of earth, the 7 astronauts onboard had a light-hearted race to the far side of the station, making jokes about being the furthest humans from Artemis.
On the way back to earth, NASA actually managed to establish an audio call between the crews of the ISS and Artemis II (where they shared the above info), and Koch called one member of the ISS crew, Jessica Meir, her "astro-sister" as the two of them previously spacewalker together in 2019. Meir then responded I'm so happy that we are back in space together, even if we are a few miles apart" (a few here being 230,000).
While Jeremy Hansen was doing an interview, Wiseman and Koch were just in the background swatting the mission mascot (a little moon plush toy named Rise) back and forth between each other.
reblog if youâve had an online friendship thatâs lasted more than 2 years
Gardening makes for most excellent theological ponderings.
One time I heard Jeff Durbin preaching on Johnâs gospel and how on Sunday morning outside the empty tomb, Mary mistakes Jesus for the gardener. Interesting detail, yes? Maybe she knew the gardener personally and Jesus looked vaguely like him from a distance.
Or maybe, possibly, itâs because He was working the groundâŚ.
And the eschatological implications of this possibly being the case just broke my little brain.
Christ is the new and better Adam. John begins his gospel in recapitulation of the creation language of Genesis. The world is not the same. The old has passed away, the new has come. In the beginningâŚ.
And then of course I have been listening to Andrew Peterson lately (not sure if Iâve mentioned it) and I had never really thought about the significance of Saturdayâthe day Christ is dead in the groundâbeing the Jewish sabbath in light of the creation week.
He said that it was finished, and the seventh day He blessed it. God restedâŚ
And then God wakens in the garden and He has work to do.
And God walked in the garden in the cool of the day.
OK I'm sorry I'm going a little feral about this so
Genesis 3:
And they heard the sound of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God among the trees of the garden. But the LORD God called to the man and said to him, âWhere are you?âAnd he said, âI heard the sound of you in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked, and I hid myself."
John 20:
She said to them, âThey have taken away my Lord, and I do not know where they have laid him.â Having said this, she turned around and saw Jesus standing, but she did not know that it was Jesus. Jesus said to her, âWoman, why are you weeping? Whom are you seeking?â Supposing him to be the gardener, she said to him, âSir, if you have carried him away, tell me where you have laid him, and I will take him away.â Jesus said to her, âMary.â She turned and said to him, âRabboni!â

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Are you like the only guy who hasnât been in Jerusalem this weekend? still one of the funniest beats in Scripture
While they were talking and discussing together, Jesus himself drew near and went with them. But their eyes were kept from recognizing him. And he said to them, âWhat is this conversation that you are holding with each other as you walk?â And they stood still, looking sad. Then one of them, named Cleopas, answered him, âAre you the only visitor to Jerusalem who does not know the things that have happened there in these days?â (Luke 24:15-18)
âPerhaps it is no wonder that the women were first at the Cradle and last at the Cross. They had never known a man like this Man - there never has been such another. A prophet and teacher who never nagged at them, never flattered or coaxed or patronised; who never made arch jokes about them, never treated them either as âThe women, God help us!â or âThe ladies, God bless them!â; who rebuked without querulousness and praised without condescension; who took their questions and arguments seriously; who never mapped out their sphere for them, never urged them to be feminine or jeered at them for being female; who had no axe to grind and no uneasy male dignity to defend; who took them as he found them and was completely unselfconscious.â // Dorothy L. Sayers
Little Women (1994) dir. Gillian Armstrong
HOW DID THIS HELP???? HOW DID THIS HELP AT ALL???? AND DEAR GOD WHAT WAS PLAN A?
#personally Iâve always assumed plan A is literally the same thing they just switch roles (x)
Psych heritage post
Happy Ides of March, folks!
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shit shit shit it's march i forgot to promote this print to yall:
read it carefully lol it's the callout of Caesar
i should emphasize, I did NOT write the original post, that was done by @heresmyfiddlestick and they get a cut of the sales from these prints.
I'm not sure how to format image IDs when they're this long so I hope this is right:
[image ID: A sheet of calligraphy print with gold and purple vinework and red daggerlike flowers. In the border there is a torn, purple lined bit of cloth meant to read as a toga and there it begins with a large drop capital F in red. the text reads as follows
Friends, mutuals, countrymen, do not scroll past;
I come to cancel Caesar, not to stan him.
The cringe posts that men make live after them;
The nuance oft interred with their bones;
So let it be with Caesar. The noble Brutus
Hath told you Caesar was problematic:
If it were so, it was a grievous fault,
And grievously hath Caesar answerâd it.
Here, under leave of Brutus and the restâ
For Brutus is an honourable man;
So are they all, all honourable menâ
Come I to comment on Caesarâs call-out post.
He was my mutual, faithful and just to me:
But Brutus says he was problematic;
And Brutus is an honourable man.
He hath brought many hot takes to my dash
Whose notifs did the general discourse fill:
Did this in Caesar seem problematic?
When that anons have cried, Caesar hath wept:
Toxicity should be made of sterner stuff:
Yet Brutus says he was problematic;
And Brutus is an honourable man.
You all did see that on the Tumblr Blaze
I thrice presented him a kingly crown,
Which he did thrice refuse: was this problematic?
Yet Brutus says he was problematic;
And, sure, he is an honourable man.
I speak not to start discourse with Brutus,
But just to provide some context on his call-out post.
You all did stan him once, not without cause:
What cause withholds you then, to follow him?
/.End ID]