The Story Is The Thing

tequila is like drinking the tears of a very happy young woman and whiskey is like drinking the tears of a very sad old man and gin is like drinking the tears of a closeted gay man named james

if i was a different person with a different personality and a different life things would be kinda different i think

the first thing u need to understand about athletes is that they are cringe losers bc they skipped school in hopes of never having to work a real job. the second thing you need to understand abt athletes is that they are first and foremost workers whose years of lucrative labour are capped by the very real limit that the strain of that selfsame work puts on their bodies which means they retire at an age before most people's careers even really take off and are expected to get by for the rest of their lives on the money they earned those few years. the third thing you need to understand is that they want to fuck their coworker.

‘song of the summer’ this ‘song of the summer’ that …. carly rae jepsen wrote a MILLION songs of the summer …. #listentowomen

love men who fall into "my girl is mad at me i hope i die" category but who also regularly do things to piss their girl off. duality of man