One day I'll have OC

Chaotic good

NO! This is Lawful Good! He is following the LAW! Chaotic doesn’t just mean cheeky!

Always reblog for malicious compliance

sometimes following the letter of the law works even better than ignoring it.

In Utah the new book banning laws apply to the bible, and there’s already someone petitioning to get it removed from schools and libraries.

I hope no English teacher ever puts up with “banning pronouns” for even a moment

Bro check it out. It's a drawing of an anime girl. But look closer. She is gaunt and has bags around her eyes. Further yet, she has an overall sullen, disheveled manner. Is that a cigarette? Perhaps a can of beer? That's fucking crazy bro. Holy fuck. Is that allowed? Normally girls are cute. Jesus Christ. That's so crazy man. Wow.

we all need to take better care of our selfs or we might Pass away

tumblr I swear to god if your ads on mobile keep opening popup webpages because my FINGER touched them while I was SCROLLING because they are SO BIG that they FILL THE SCREEN AS I SCROLL PAST THEM I am going to MANIFEST SNAKES IN YOUR WALLS

kids were roleplaying with minecraft figurines and one of them had their figure go up to the other and say “i’m in love with you” and the other one replied “sword slash to the chest. and you’re on fire”

I see that "learned helplessness" is the hot new psychological term getting wildly misused. the phrase you're looking for is "weaponized incompetence," babes

why are scissors packaged the way they are it’s like they’re taunting us. Oh wow this is such a difficult awful packaging to get through that seems to cause physical damage to your hands as some sort of sick self defense mechanic, if only i had something to help get through it, something sharp perhaps

what sort of sick twisted game is it trying to play here

[On phone] Whaddya mean I can't say it. Why the fuck not. [silence] Well how many guys do I need to fuck before I can say it

once my friend made a drink he called turpentine that tasted like every worst college night out rolled into one and felt like getting whacked in the head with a hammer, and I woke up in my own apartment with my phone wallet keys clothes and absolutely zero memory of the night before, and when I checked my watch I'd walked over 60k steps.

60k steps in the middle of the night in heels for reasons entirely unknown to me. what was I doing. where did I go. where did I come from. cotton eye joe. or whatever.

maybe im wrong but I think red peter griffin might be joking

college is like paying the devil to torture you

hi satan from hell, here is all of the money that my family saved for multiple generations, will you please flog me until pain feels so familiar that its absence is jarring? thank youuuu