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@thenisaidno
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percyâs neighborhood friends who know him as a good kid who always ends up in trouble and ms sally as a good, kind woman and gabe as a bum whose screaming and yelling echoes out of their apartment at all hours, hearing that percy and sally suddenly went missing and gabeâs car was found crashed and burned to the point of not being able to detect blood or anything inside it in long island when they were supposed to be in montauk but they couldnât find any bodies, watching as gabe does tv interviews playing the victim like heâs genuinely upset about the whole thing. the neighborhood thinking gabe drove them out to the middle of nowhere and killed them before destroying the evidence
significantly #myshane is not a kid person in general (not that he actively dislikes kids, but he doesn't feel a particular affinity towards them), but i feel like kids just REALLY love his energy because he 100% talks to them the same way he would an adult, and kids eat it up
like at first he might be more stiff/unsure in interacting with them, but i feel like once he settles in and has had a little experience with the kids at camp, it's just
*kid lining up to jump off the top row of bleachers*
"dude, i am begging you. i do NOT want to fill out the paperwork for that."
"i can do it!"
"i mean the can or can't isn't the problem here. it's the hitting the ground part."
Post TLG, Shane has a rare completely off night. He was awful and he knows it. When they get back to the locker room after the loss, Shane goes to apologize to the team. Before he can start, the team just pushes him out of the way and surrounds Ilya. Theyâre like âDude, what the fuck is wrong with you? Whatâs your problem?â and Ilya is so confused as to why theyâre upset with him because he played well despite losing. Someone is like âCap, itâs your job to put out and you clearly havenât been and thatâs why Shane is playing like shit, so why are you not giving it up?â. Someone else explains that they figured out a while ago that Shane plays like a God when heâs getting laid regularly, and goes back to being a normal human when not, so they need to know why Ilya isnât bending over and giving it up. They start assuming that something is medically wrong and Bood is like âWell if Ilya canât take it then someone on the team has to step upâ and Luca is immediately like âIâll let Shane fuck meâŚI mean for the sake of team and everythingâŚif I mustâŚIâm not actually eager or anythingâŚlike I havenât thought about this at allâŚever!â Ilya starts yelling at the team, telling them that everything is fine, but they yell back and now everyone is arguing. Meanwhile, Shane is very amused by the fact that the team thinks heâs the top.
Ilya's sick with the flu, he's feverish and his nose is so stuffy and he's coughing like crazy but, more concerningly, he and Shane haven't had sex for three days. It's the longest they've gone while both being in the same house and, sure, Ilya doesn't really feel up for it, what with the way every breath is a concentrated effort that comes with the risk of hacking up a lung, but it's really weighing on him. His poor Shane, who so loves being filled, hasn't gotten cock in so long purely because Ilya's immune system betrayed him. So he's lying on the bed, barely able to keep his eyes open, Shane trying to feed him soup and in between bites Ilya's saying things like "you could ride me," and "it might take a little more work to get me hard but I'm sure I could do it," and "I promise not to kiss you if you're worried about getting sick," his words all affected by how stuffed up his nose is. Shane just rolls his eyes, like, "wow, Ilya, that's so selfless of you," and Ilya's nodding, all serious, saying his illness shouldn't stop Shane from taking what he needs and Shane's like, "as tempting as that offer is maybe just focus on getting better so that you can fuck me properly, okay?"

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Okay but one of Ilyaâs favorite moves is whenever a former hook up texts him for literally any reason (aside from Svetlana) he'll show Shane who then demands that Ilya give him the phone so he can text back "He has a husband." and block them.
The best part, and the real reason Ilya shows him the texts is that jealous Shane will then demand hardcore freak sex that they normally save for breaks.
my controversial opinion is I donât think Zuko was confused by âmy first girlfriend turned into the moonâ
he was there during siege of the North. he infiltrated the spirit oasis. he has an uncle who studies spirits and the spirit world. he watched the sky go dark then the moon suddenly reappear like everyone else in the entire world did. and most importantly he watched zhao get eaten by a giant godzilla fish spirit.
his entire life since he saw that beam of blue-white light in the south pole has been âthis day has already been so goddamn weirdâ
The only really new information was that that was Sokkaâs girlfriend
Important opinion in the tags that I need to have be part of the post:
Also, Iroh was there? He literally watched Sokka make out with the moon spirit. And you want to tell me that a romantic sap like him would not have immediately told Zuko about this romantic tragedy? Please, Zuko has known about this for ages, he just knows that this is not an acceptable situation in which to say âyeah, I know.â
Sokka: âMy girlfriend turned into the moon.â
Zuko: âI know.â âYes.â âShe sure did.â âUh huh.â âTell me something new.â âAre we still talking about that?â âThatâs rough, buddy.â
[image: tags by samwisethebold: #itâs not that he doesnât get what sokka means #itâs that how on earth do you respond to that]
When you put it like that, this is actually a legendary display of tact on Zukoâs part
Rolex invites Shane to the Royal Box at Wimbledon again and this time Shane accepts because Rolex specifically asked if he could bring his husband as well and fuck yes he can and together Ilya and Shane are ready to serve so much cunt. They both get dressed in some sharp, elevated summer suits, Ilya in Versace and Shane in Gucci, the dramatic sunglasses & the bitchiest, judgiest mogging are ON, they mirror each other as they cross their legs; occasionally they're holding hands or sit with Ilya's arm around Shanes waist, they are the epitome of power husbands & this is their playground. Do they have one clue what is going on on the court? Of course not. That doesn't stop them from having a fabulous time showing off each other. They know they steal the limelight looking as devastating as they do, together. Turns out these dreadful PR appointments are actually incredible fun when you have your husband/best friend/soulmate with you and Shane can't imagine how he ever did this without Ilya.
Now picture this, occasionally they whisper into each other's ears, sometimes its just sweet nothings and sometimes it's some devastating chirps about tennis, and each time a precious smile breaks through, only for each other, but it drives the photographers wild.
(afterwards, Ilya is excited to have the perfect summer with Shane where they fuck their way across europe)
My absolute gospel truth and I'm sorry this is so sappy but--where I'm living, Ilya fully changes his name to Hollander when they get married, like just fully legally changes it. And despite the fact that he continues to use Rozanov professionally ("Just like J. Lo," Ilya says.) everyone who knows them personally obviously knows what Ilya's legal name is and also assume it's a way to kind of stick it to his shitheel father. To this end, and kind of as a joke at first, people start referring to their two-person unit as The Hollanders ("Okay, the Hollanders are in room 508" etc.) but it becomes steadily less and less a joke when neither Shane or Ilya really seems to think of it as one. Ilya especially seems to genuinely love it. He'll say shit like "Oh yes the Hollanders will be there" when asked if they're coming to a barbecue like they live in a postcard. He LOVES to give his name as Ilya Hollander and he LOVES to book reservations under 'Misters Hollander' and he LOVES to say the words 'Shane and Ilya Hollander' out loud with his mouth. I also think that for their last game together in the league Ilya and Shane wear jerseys that say S. Hollander 24 and I. Hollander 81 and it's like. An end of an era type thing. And they frame the jerseys.
I know I've talked about Ilya being frustrated he can't brag about pulling Shane but you know who else would be frustrated about not being able to brag? Yuna Hollander would be so frustrated that she basically has the two best hockey players in the world in her family and she can't even bring up that now she has TWO sons in the mlh and oh what is your son up to Sharon? Hmm that sounds rough that you have to send him money every month. She's in meetings, maybe there are other players agents and managers and they try to bond by putting down Rozanov and she wants to go "your client couldn't even touch Ilya's points per game. Don't fucking talk about one of my boys." and she's so pissed off by the interaction she gets that player removed from the brand deal.

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I feel that "lawn care" as promoted in the USA can be considered some kind of pseudoscience.
It doesn't have the conspiracy-theory-adjacent qualities of virtually every other "pseudoscience," which makes me hesitant to call it that, but the theory and method of it is still full of totally unsupported junk.
Where do I start?
I'm a gardener and so are the majority of people I spend time around. If you are mowing 3+ times a week and regularly spending money on fertilizer, soil tests, herbicides, fungicides, and insecticides, you have chosen the most expensive, time consuming thing you could possibly do with your yard. Unless you are a farmer as your livelihood, NOTHING else you could grow is that high maintenance. Nothing.
Most turfgrasses are invasive species. I said it.
The practice of "nuking" your lawn (killing everything in it and "starting over")...If you have a so-called "weed problem" this is probably the worst thing you can do.
Listen to me very carefully: "Weed" seeds are everywhere. There is, at all times, a supply of seeds lying dormant in the soil, waiting for the right conditions to sprout. (It's called the "soil seed bank" and you can look it up.) They are capable of "waiting" for years, even decades. Furthermore, most "weed" species spread by wind, meaning you can't physically eliminate them from an outdoor area unless you...surround your entire yard with an incredibly fine mesh netting and never leave, I guess.
Heavy management will make your "weed" problem progressively worse and worse because those plants are specifically adapted to colonize barren areas that recently underwent disastrous events that killed off most life.
Basically all plants are adapted to live in the company of other organisms, and suffer when there are no other plants around. "Weeds" with deep taproots penetrate into and aerate the soil. Clover puts nitrogen in the ground that other plants need. Low ground covers keep the soil moist and stop the sun from baking your grass to a crisp.
The plant "taking over" your lawn is probably not killing your grass. Your grass is dying and it's being replaced by something more suited to the environment. This is supposed to happen.
Monocultures are notoriously susceptible to disease and mass die-offs. "Oh no a big patch of my lawn is dying!" Yeah, that happens when you plant monocultures. You set yourself up for this.
"Why is there a bare patch in my yard/why won't grass grow well here?" Because in nature, each plant has a relatively narrow range of conditions it likes to grow in, so other plants it might otherwise compete with can stick to their preferred conditions and nobody has to compete directly. Win-win. Not all parts of your yard have the exact same amount of sun, moisture, etc. Expecting the plant life to look the same is unrealistic.
Let me make this very clear: It is fully impossible to "solve" the problem of plants popping up in your yard that aren't your one favored variety of grass. You will be buying herbicides for the rest of your life, and it will get worse, not better, because willy-nilly use of herbicides is leading to plants developing herbicide resistance faster than we can come up with new herbicides.
@kidpixdeluxe-4
From my limited knowledge of ecology, "but this is what natives have been saying for YEARS" basically sums up literally all work that has been done with ecology in north america
It is wild how pretty much everyone knows, thanks to the "dustbowl", that monocultures are bad. But then they all go obsess over the monocultures that they cultivate in front of their houses and wonder why its such high maintenance and always looking so ugly...
Shane at 45 years old, watching some punk-ass rookie on screen beat the All Stars speed record that he's held for over a decade now: Baby, do you think I can come out of retirement for next season?
MyShane was DEVASTATED when "Ilya Rozanov Best Hits Compilation" by Hockey_Guy435423 disappeared due to copyright claims. It only had like 200 views and 100 of them were Shane watching with his dick in his hand.
There are others from SportsNet and ESPN but that one just had a certain je n'ais ce quoi that got Shane going. Shane DMs Hockey_Guy435423 but doesn't hear back and goes on a deep dive trying to figure out if there's a way to recover deleted youtube videos and he never does but it's okay because in the process he finds like 5 more Ilya Rozanov fight compilation videos from small creators. He meticulously downloads these to a special folder just in case and adds them to the regular rotation.
thinking about hollanov having an outdoor shower at the cottage. shane had one installed to wash the lake water and sand off before going back inside after swimming, of course ilya discovers it on his first visit and he has to be horny about it. seeing shane use it after a dive in the lake, midday sun hitting his tan skin, swim trunks clinging to his body and around his ass, he wanders up to shane and wraps around him under the water kissing at his shoulders as the water runs over him in rivets. he plays with the waistband on shaneâs trunks trying to see how far he can get shane to go, feeling him squirm and protest because they âcanâtâ theyâre outdoorsâŚanyone can seeâŚwhat if my parents drive up. ilya just sinks to his knees and tells him he better be quick thenâŚ
ilya makes it his mission to fuck shane properly in the outdoor shower. maybe they go for a sunset swim one day and ilya is just rinsing off completely naked in the outdoor shower cause his trunks had âsand in themâ and heâs glowing golden under the waterâŚthe soft spray of it diffusing off of him and creating rainbows in the sun. water dripping down his legs and into his v-line and down down down. shane is standing near by in his towel trying not to pass out at this spectacle. ilya motions for shane to drop his towel and trunks while putting a hand on his cock and stroking slowly. a recreation of the first time but this time itâs not in the dingy rink showersâŚthis time theyâre at their favorite place in the world, and theyâre in love and itâs open but so private and itâs just the perfect amount of exhibition for shane. he joins ilya in the shower and they kiss hot and hungry, their skin slick with water sliding together. the warm water contrasting with the cool late summer air creating goosebumps on skin. shane is whispering to ilya between kisses âwanted it just like thisâŚthe first time-couldnât stop staring at you, i was so scared you could read my mindâ ilya is laughing softly softly against his skin âi could and i did, you are many things lyubimyy but subtle is not oneâ and shane is just kissing him back harder taking him in hand and showing him exactly what was on his mind.
an idea for a college au where itâs shaneâs freshman year and itâs the first time heâs drunk as hell and heâs trying to enter his room and his keys is not working at all and heâs mumbling and grumbling and trying to open the door and nothing is working and suddenly the door swings open and thereâs a man that shaneâs has never seen before and he looks mad âwhat the fuck are you doing in my doorâ he asks âyour door? this is my roomâ shaneâs says âno, this is my roomâ âno, itâs my roomâ shaneâs replies slurring the words and then they go back and forth. the guys notice heâs drunk and kinda accepts heâs not going anywhere with this conversation so he just pulls shane inside, takes his shoes and jeans and put shane to sleep with him in his bed. next morning shaneâs wakes up with the worst headache he ever felt in his entire life an arm draped across his stomach and panics looking at his side and seeing a literal angel laying besides him. he bolts from the bed finds his clothes and everything else and leaves the room. later he realizes heâs in a different floor. after that he just tries do pretend that this never happened. next class he gets there early, like always, and who shows up and sit right next to him? the guy from the other day ânot very nice of you to ditch me like that after i took such good care of you, yes?â and shaneâs face is bright red from embarrassment and mumble an apology but he wants nothing to do with the guy anymore but now he has an assignment with him and now they have to spend weeks together and thereâs no way to run anymore. heâs stuck with ilya rozanov who seems to be enjoying every single minute of shaneâs despair

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Ilya is feels something ugly crawl up his throat after the first time shane scores for Ottawa. He doesnât see ecstatic delight that always blooms on Shane's face even when they're simply passing pucks in the rink attached to the cottage, Doesn't see the easy confidence that shane usually carries himself with on the ice, Doesn't see THE shane hollander's victory smile.
What he sees is desperate relief creeping up on Shane's face and it makes Ilya feel like he ate rocks for lunch.
His husband, one of best players ever to grace the ice, amongst the most decorated players in the league...stares at his own hands in disbelief....
Like he didn't know if he could still do it....
Like he needed permission to be there....
Like he had to prove his worth....
And Ilya promises himself....never again... never.ever.again.
ilya wakes up in the middle of the night arching hard, horny as hell and just wishing to do a quickie and fall back asleep with his husband in his arms. so he reaches for shane and finds nothing, just empty sheets. and he gets up all groggy and confused looking around for his husband who is nowhere to be found in their room, not even a light from the en suite. so he leaves the bed and starts wandering around their house looking for him. he sees the light on in the office and walks toward it and finds his husband sitting there in his chair wearing only his black boxers and his glasses and ilyaâs brain just short circuits âhe wants to kill meâ ilya thinks and then shane looks up from his laptop to ilya âoh, my love, did i wake you up?â while reaching his hands out for ilya to pull him into his lap âyou did, i canât sleep without you, sweetheartâ and shane just snorts âoh my poor husband canât sleep without his body pillowâ shane says while caressing ilyaâs arms âthe best body pillow. what you doing?â Ilya asks looking to shaneâs laptop and to the amount of paper on the desk âoh i forgot to look at some contracts mom sent me and i couldnât sleep till i sort this outâ shane replies kissing ilyaâs shoulder âitâs going to take long?â ilya asks pouting while hiding his face in the crock of shaneâs neck âi donât know actuallyâ shane replies and ilya groans âshane i woke up cus iâm horny as hell and wanted to be inside youâ he whines âyou still can, we can cockwarm while i sort my moms paper and then you can fuck me however you wantâ shane replies and ilya stand up so quickly he almost fall and shane laughs with how eager his husband is just so he can be inside him. and they do the cockwarming, and they fuck in the office, and one more time in the bedroom and ilya sleeps like a baby completely worn out and tangled up in his husband