i had the funniest fucking dream i was hanging out with michael jackson and someone asked him what his pronouns were and he said “he/hee!” and i woke up crying

That punchline hit me like a sack of wet mice

I got like zero sleep and I’m at work trying to act like a human being and I was nearly moved to tears by a stock photo of a sad businessman

life is actually just about rice

why isn’t anyone allowed to be wrong anymore? it’s okay to be wrong. no one should be terrified of every tiny little mistake they might make. being wrong, and realizing you were wrong, is how you learn and grow and change.

g…gamer dress

As silly as the situation is at a glance, I honestly respect them for owning the poor wording and listening to suggestions from their target audience, instead of doubling down like most companies

Actually seeing the rest of the tweet and all the followup has been enlightening

Whoever decided that 2019 was going to be the year of posting Golden Girls bits is a hero

caused a public outcry in lichen class today after announcing my hypothesis that a burnt calzone could be classified as a nut

i have been asked to defend my burnt calzone hypothesis. a nut is defined as a fruiting structure that holds one, but sometimes two or more, seeds where the pericarp (all layers of the ovary around the mitotic zone) becomes, and i quote from my notes, “woody or bone-like”. a burnt calzone is a fully enclosed structure with woody or bone-like outer tissue. the calzone filling could be classified as a meiotic Sex Zone capable of hardening into one, but sometimes two or more, hard structures. the disturbing question here, i think, would be for what organism a burnt calzone is an ovary

Swedish cowboy

Jihå