Lenny the Reviewer

I mean, in some very interesting Technically Correct ways, they didn't actually die? Now, they're very much no longer alive. But the forces involved are such that they didn't get any of the usual cellular processes of death, they simply went from biology to physics in less time than it takes a signal to travel down your optic nerve.

ive invented (note: dubious claim) something i call the bear diet which is mostly fruits and vegetables with fish as the main protein source and something like once a month you eat a few hyperprocessed foods of your liking because that is when you, the bear, raid a dumpster in the suburbs

after the hyperprocessed foods, do you take tranquilizers to simulate getting captured by animal control and returned to the wild?

i would settle for melatonin gummies but well. knock yourself out

Where's that tweet about how American chants are "let's go [team name] and some other country (Irish?) fans are "I've made up a song about the other team's drinking problem to the tune of London Bridge Is Falling Down one two three"?

Amazing gift idea for someone who's about to go through or just had bottom surgery

light was such a loser cuz he didnt just google the 100 richest people and start writing down names

how would you feel if you woke up tomorrow and find out exactly 100 of the world’s richest people died of heart attacks at exactly noon universal time. can you imagine the theories. light is absolutely a loser for not doing this

There has to be a *pattern* to it, though, to really get their attention. Like it has to be the same time of day, the same day, each week.

So there was a Death Note spin-off called A-Kira where the Death Note falls into the hands of this student who doesn't want to kill people but doesn't want to let anyone else use it for evil. He instead exploits the rich and powerful instead by using clever trickery to anonymously announce to the world that he has the Death Note and will sell it to the highest bidder, accepting the payment through a mass lump-sum payment to a very specific Japanese bank that will divide the money evenly across every single account holder making it impossible to trace or pin down who the actual holder of the Death Note is. It gets sold and delivered to the US President which you think would be terrible except the whole auction was so public and widely televised that everyone in the WORLD knows the US has it and it'd be impossible to actually use covertly without everyone knowing it, so they instead make a show of having it but never using it, keeping it out of circulation. Literally the only reason this kid fails is because the King of Death got so mad that he found a way to game the system that he retroactively puts in a new rule to the Death Note that kills whoever sells it. Even Ryuk was low-key upset at the end result, he actually admired how perfect the plan was.

(my first page had a lot of spiders, so that's probably something some people may want to be aware could happen)

LOL whos tye saultry little binch on the bottom lsft????

this post is less than 1% away from being completely incomprehensible

normalize flopping. it’s ok to fail baby. sexy even

the amount of people saying "i thought you meant flopping on the ground". target audience

normalize flopping. it's ok to flail baby. sexy even

You know that whatever character did those problematic things isn't like. Real, right?

You are aware that a fictional character is just a rhetorical construct designed to fulfill a narrative/thematic purpose right? That their actions are written by an author who wants to use them to explore complex ideas and moral gray areas within the safe confines of fiction right? That they aren't a real person who has killed real people right?

we deserve to have media with fat characters that like being fat and that are confident and happy in their fatness and they do not want to change that one bit im being very reasonable here