zero

they should tier rank these like Hank Green did w the press about his cancer diagnosis

this is everything

The haters are trying to put a cup over me

The haters are trying to put a cup over me and take me outside

"Your love language is what you were deprived of as a child" actually no you're allowed to want, prefer and like things without everything tracing back to some dormant unprocessed trauma. You can just say you want to bounce on it without having to explain how as a child you always wanted - but never got - a trampoline.

I know I couldn't handle having kids but if I was left in charge of some, I'd take them to the park to feed ducks. Not bread though, you shouldn't feed that to ducks. We're feeding them lettuce. Let the ducks going apeshit over lettuce show the kids that lettuce is actually awesome. When they go home, their parents are baffled by the fact that the kids are now willingly eating salad. In the most horribly animalistic fucked up way possible.

i like the phrases "it's not for me," "it's not my thing," and "i'm not the target audience" because they're the most concise way to express "this thing that you enjoy has merits but idgaf about it" without being aggressive

You know for the first 18-ish years of your life everyone your age is mostly doing the same things and then all of a sudden every year for the rest of your life somebody your age is getting divorced while somebody else just learned what a leaf is and you have no idea what’s going on or what you’re supposed to be doing

big fan of "one william" as a quantity. keep it up

It makes me think of the mysterious Williamcoin I received in the mail recently.

holy shit, you found it. one william dollar.

starting to think some of yall arent serious bout finding beauty in the grotesque

they cant even find beauty in fat ppl

me, as i force a dollar bill into the self-checkout machine: thats right…..good boy……vore president washington

im begging all of you to stop reblogging th is

Your actions have consequences

a court of thorns and roses. ballad of songbirds and snakes. bowl of macaroni and cheese

i dont read theory because i cant let outside opinions influence me or i lose the sancity of my Thought Palace where theres a butler and a monkey

when youre talking to someone and you can tell theyre a sex baby and not a stork baby

I love my leg hair #myleghair

and my arm hair #myarmhair