*winging it*

secretary birds look pretty normal but for some reason people have collectively decided to photograph them like they're [takes a moment to find an acceptable way to say this] women

i have a theory that all male youtubers can be classified as either uke or seme, and that the gender division of their audience falls roughly along the lines of those categories. this theory is currently still in the "unfounded conjecture" stage right now, which means that by sociology standards it's basically already proven

"I'm still kicking" is such a funny way to say "I'm still alive". Like lol. I'm still thrashing. Flailing. Writhing even. The violence remains.

Hi, its me. The warmest creature in the world. I love you. Im the warmest creature in the world and I love you so much and I need to be in your lap right now. Yes, I know about the heat wave. That's okay though because I was already the warmest creature in the world so I don't mind. I love you and you need to let me sleep in your lap right now. I'm soooo warm and I love you sooo much. If you say no you'll be saying no to a thing that love you. Let me sleep in your lap. When I fall asleep I get warmer. I love you

nosferatu? no. tuferatu. no es mi problema.

ni mi castillo, ni mi vampiro.

no you do not need to hold fictional characters "accountable". they are not real.

turns out i am gay

holy shit how’d this alpaca learn how to type

Diversity win! The alpaca is gay!

he was a llama

a llama?! he’s supposed to be dead!

@hellsite-hall-of-fame i think this deserves to be here

Happy Pride

That's got to be the funniest graph ever published in a paper

it’s weird that professional letters are supposed to start with “dear.” i don’t even call my mom that

my darling hiring manager. my springtime rose. if hired i will bring a strong work ethic to this position