The Reason I Lack Friends

BREAK UP THE MONOPOLIES

having a younger sibling is so embarrassing iwouldnt stoop this low for anyone but her im like quadruple texting "JUST TELL ME IF YOU WANT TO GO TO THE AQUARIUM ON DECEMBER 29TH SO I CAN GET TICKETS" and she leaves me on read 10000 times.

St Cunthony of Servington

"there is no way you're not using chatgpt for at least a few things here and there no matter your stance on it" what the FUCK are you talking about

Tumblr is such an awesome website. What if your diary had a pvp option

"theyre giving he man pronouns" is one of the funniest things ive heard recently. i cant stop thinking about it. he man. the man with a pronoun in his name. he. theyre giving he man pronouns. incredible

i literally cannot convey how long i fucking laughed after i realized that boobytrap backwards is partyboob

i really hope that this does not end up being the text post that defines my entire tumblr career

this is my favorite fuckin comic ever I have never seen something capture the experience so well

"cigarette" implies the existence of a much larger "cigar"

i recovered by the time i hit post but when i first had this thought i had genuinely forgotten cigars exist

’kill them with kindness” WRONG. Rohirrim‼️🐴 🛡 ⚔️ 🐴⚔️🛡🐴🐴⚔️🛡🛡⚔️🐴⚔️⚔️⚔️🐴🛡🛡🐴🐴⚔️🐴🐴🐴⚔️🛡🛡⚔️🐴🐴🐴⚔️🛡🐴⚔️🛡🛡⚔️🐴