I do think it's funny that Murderbot complains about all the stuff that it doesn't know because its company didn't teach it anything useful but then when Three spends all its time interacting with nonfiction media and learning stuff mb is like "I don’t get you. Why would you watch nonfiction when there is sanctuary moon"

Imagine being the gays at a pride event in 2004 living their lives when someone grabs the microphone and announces to the room that Ronald Reagan was pronounced dead. Can you even imagine the hype, the celebration, the pure elation

This is the Pride Month that It will happen. I feel it in my gay bones

guy who's having gauzy idealized wife flashbacks for the whole adventure but it turns out she isn't dead or anything he just really misses her and wants to get home

*gets back to the nest* baby you are NEVER gonna believe how i got this fish

see??? Humans LOVE sharing and being friends with strangers!

theres a new villain roaming around new york that has all the powers of a tapir. give me an hour or two im gonna go google what the fuck tapirs do ill let you know if we need to be scared

OK it seems if you are fruits or berries this is really really bad news for you otherwise youre fine

Yeah, if he’d just wear pants he wouldn’t be a villain.

auto immune disorders happen when the immune system ignores regulatory factors and begins attacking healthy bodily tissues, due to what scientists refer to as "sheer love of the game"

if you are a parent, or may become one, or you are otherwise likely to arrive in the situation of caring for a child while they eat, promise me this: if a child doesn't like a certain food or food group, you will ask them WHY. and specifically, you will pay attention to either confirming or ruling out "it makes my mouth itch" or "it makes my stomach hurt," both of which are medically important info that children may not provide unprompted. which i know because this PSA has been brought to you by "i spent my entire childhood and much of my early teens eating peas and lentils while wondering why everyone else liked the Violently Itchy Mouth Sensation so much, like were they a bunch of legume masochists or something, before i finally realized that Violently Itchy Mouth Sensation was in fact a sinister demon appearing only to me, and her true demonic name was: Legume Allergy"

Do not let your child suffer from spicy bananas!

Okay but for the entirety of the events of platform decay ART (drone) and Mensa were alone in the shuttle together. Did they watch media? Did they play games? What did they talk about? (Murderbot?) im crawling up the walls somebody write the fic

Rereading all systems red and the first 2 chapters are strong contenders for funniest intro to a book series. Jumping straight to action, and mb is giving us absolutely no info about anything. Who are those people? Some weird hippies it's not important. Why are they here? Mb does not give a shit. What is this planet? Fuck if it knows. Here is a small paragraph that fucking states everyone's relationship status like a wiki article that we are never gonna get back to. Ugh there are hostiles that keep us away from our media #our media.

murderbot and arts first meeting is literally so funny. like imagine you meet a biblically accurate angel and instead of being all 'be not afraid' it says actually you SHOULD be afraid. and then when you are in fact afraid it goes oh shit oh fuck. not THAT afraid, sorry. wanna watch tv? and then you watch tv with it and it keeps telling you to pause it when its favourite characters are in danger so it can calm down. and then it asks to do surgery on your bones. Asshole Research Transport character of all time