It's Not a Simple Life

ok universe, i’m ready to feel good things. make me feel good things.

whenever i post this it works  reblog if u want to feel good things & the universe will bring u something sweet 

“people always talk about the naruto run but they never talk about the kingdom hearts run” [THWAP THWAP THWAP THWAP THWAP THWAP THWAP THWAP THWAP THWAP THWAP THWAP THWAP]

i just had the weirdest moment, i was feeling my front teeth with my tongue because they’re the tiniest bit crooked, and then i had the thought “i’ll check if they’re also crooked in my other mouth” and then i realized to my shock and confusion that i have only one mouth, leading me to believe that in a past life i was a terrible monster with two mouths

A few months ago, I thought to myself “Mmm I’m so tired… how much longer in this one again?” and I knew instinctively what I meant by ‘this one’ was this body and this life. I then spend a few wide-eyed moments having an identity/existential crisis like how many times have I been on this earth to have such an instinctive response to being bone-weary to my soul? No one can really answer, especially not me.

In July 2017, one night I woke up around 2 a.m and blurted out in a quasi professorial voice “the Equinox Bird has infinite beaks, all in the wrong direction, and infinite eyes” and I don’t know what the fuck I was dreaming about but it still haunts me. It seemed like a very important information for a few seconds.

i really appreciate the last commenter giving us an exact date and time like that information needs to be preserved

One time I passed out on the couch after going a few days without sleep, and when I woke up mom said I had been speaking in German in my sleep, and it sounded like I was ordering people to build something

When I was like 5 my mom took me to the grave of her friend that died of cancer and I asked what happened and my mom explained that she died and i fucking said “I died once” and my mom asked me to explain and I went into pretty detailed explanation about how I died in a war because “I got stabbed by a gun with a knife at the end” (my exact words) and I met god and she (she’s a woman obvs) asked if I wanted to stay or go back to earth and I said I wanted to go back so I chose my mom cause she was struggling to have a baby (she had me through IVF) and lemme tell you that changed her like nothing will make you second guess your religious beliefs like a five year old explaining heaven and god to you

i.e. why when you or someone else gets stabbed or impaled, you should leave the object in the wound until medical help arrives.

des

pa

when is someone finally going to declare their love for me by gifting me an intricately decorated hair comb

Praying that $1500 randomly comes to you when you need it the most this year.

I got a check for $1697 a week after I reblogged this. The fuq.

OMG that’s fucking amazing! 😎

WHAT THE FUCK THIS IS AWESOME????!?!!!

This is literally me.

Fun fact: Hawaiian Roller Coaster Ride was scientifically proven to be the happiest Disney song.