THASMINLOVE (CANON)
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@theartofmadeline

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I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
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we're not kids anymore.
noise dept.
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@thasminlove
THASMINLOVE (CANON)

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I need everyone to know that the ship Götheborg, the world's largest ocean-going wooden sailing ship, answered a distress call the other day.
Imagine waiting for the coast guard or whatever to show up and instead a replica of 18th century merchant ship pulls up and tows you to the coast.
pov: you’ve been transported to the 17th century
#in the article it says that the sailboat sailors were concerned because they could not be towed quickly because of the kind of boat#so they asked Götheborg what type of ship they were and warned that they would not be able to go above a certain speed#and götheborg went ' we are also a sailboat. 50 meters length. no worries :) '#and the poor sailboat sailors were just like ' That's not possible. they have to be messing with us' and then the ship Rolled Up (via bunjywunjy)
I'm crying. Here's a photo of a sailor from the Götheborg watching over the little sailboat in tow:
From the story:
We repeatedly emphasized that we were aboard a small 8-meter sailboat, but the response was the same each time: "We are a 50-meter three-masted sailboat, and we offer our assistance in towing you to Paimpol." We were perplexed by the size difference between our two boats, as we feared being towed by a boat that was too large and at too fast a speed that could damage our boat. The arrival of the Götheborg on the scene was rapid and surprising, as we did not expect to see a merchant ship from the East India Company of the XVIII century. This moment was very strange, and we wondered if we were dreaming. Where were we? What time period was it? The Götheborg approached very close to us to throw the line and pass a large rope. The mooring went well, and our destinies were linked for very long hours, during which we shared the same radio frequency to communicate with each other. The crew of the Götheborg showed great professionalism and kindness towards us. They adapted their speed to the size of our boat and the weather conditions. We felt accompanied by very professional sailors. Every hour, the officer on duty of the Götheborg called us to ensure everything was going well.[...] This adventure, very real, was an incredible experience for us. We were extremely lucky to cross paths with the Götheborg by chance and especially to meet such a caring crew. Dear commander and crew of the Götheborg, your kindness, and generosity have shown that your ship is much more than just a boat. It embodies the noblest values of the sea, and we are honored to have had the chance to cross your path and benefit from your help.
"Our destinies were linked for very long hours" is just knocking me out.
a lot of people dont care about insect biomass collapse bc when they hear we are losing 2.5% of the insect biomass per year they just imagine the cockroach and housefly population decreasing by that much. they dont realize those are among the only ones that will remain unbothered
you can make a little oasis right where you are, and it matters
every year of restoring native plants I see a great increase in the insect populations, and loads of new insects i never saw before (all of them harmless--the insects that are harmful or parasitic on humans are the main ones being unaffected by the decrease in insect populations)
(a large part of) the problem is Plant Sameness. we must restore plant diversity
i think it is important to recognize the ways in which your favorite thing sucks. i think it keeps u normal
prev im so sorry to put you on blast like this but please know this had me in hysterics

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“who’s more likely to flirt their way into a room upgrade?”
the flirting prompt for @swarlasummer !
Okay I think most of my followers are from outside the UK so I need to explain to you what the fuck has happened in British politics in the last 24 hours
Recently, Nigel Farage (the Member of Parliament for Clacton, and the frog-faced leader of right-wing fascist party Reform UK) has come under scrutiny for receiving a ÂŁ5 million "gift" from a crypto billionare, and being unable to give a consistent answer for why. He has denied any wrongdoing, he has threatened reporters for asking questions about the matter, and he is currently under investigation by the Parliamentary Standards Commission.
If the Standards Commission finds Farage in breach of conduct, he will likely face a recall election in his district in September. He is unhappy with this possibility, so he has decided to "resign" and trigger a special election now. I say "resign" in quotes because he is standing in said election, and intends to remain in Parliament. Theoretically, winning this election will demonstrate that he has a mandate from the people in his district to continue representing them in spite of the allegations against him.
This is idiotic for several reasons. First, resigning now does not permanently shut down the Standards Commission investigation; if he is re-elected, the Commission can still find against him later on and still force him to face a recall election, meaning the Clacton constituency might have to hold two elections in the space of a few months.
The other problem for Farage is that essentially nobody else is bothering to entertain this farce. No major party is running a candidate against him, arguing that Farage is throwing a tantrum and wasting public money in the process. Only one opponent of note has put their name forward: intergalactic space warrior and perennial satirical candidate Count Binface.
The above image gallery is, at time of writing, the entire slate of candidates for this election.
This gambit has backfired spectacularly on Farage. He thrives on media attention, but with no serious candidates standing, this campaign won't receive any. No journalist who does cover it will bother asking him policy questions, so they will have to ask him about the ÂŁ5m "gift" instead, which he hates discussing. He cannot run his usual shtick of presenting himself as the "anti-establishment voice", because the only thing more absurd than running against a comedian with a dustbin on his head is referring to said dustbin comedian as an "establishment politician". He cannot even attack Binface for not being local to the district because, to quote Binface himself, Farage "spends more time in America than in Clacton". The whole process will humiliate Farage --doubly so if Binface (as the sole protest candidate) garners a significant portion of the vote -- and one of the few things that fascist politicians cannot stand is humiliation.
Unfortunately I think Binface's chances of actually winning are slim (Clacton is a heavily right-wing area, and many people who oppose Farage will probably ignore the election outright rather than cast a protest vote). If he does win, though, I can say with certainty that the crabs will be raving and the Destiel screenshots will be out in full force.
this from the guy who wrote the sting pain index, a scale he constructed after letting himself be stung by insects
“why did i start this list” pleaseeeeeee this is so funny
his descriptions were extremely on-point, and frankly inspiring when writing a hurt/comfort scene
Instagram poets could never!
For those who want it, here is the entire list:
Anyways, dude's 1,000% a huge masochist. Nobody just describes pain like this unless they're enjoying it.
for consideration
so you're telling me the fifa world cup is all men? its all men's teams? and so is the superbowl? and all the sports teams that states are known for and make copious amounts of merch for are also men's teams? and only 5 women have ever entered formula one since its inception in 1950 and only two of them were able to compete? and this is normal? its acceptable?
i grew up playing backyard soccer on the pc as a child in the early 2000s where boys and girls would play on the same team and against each other and you're telling me that's still an unrealistic fantasy that can't happen in real life?

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for real tho it feels exhausting that ive seen this whole "woman should be allowed to abstain from X beauty standard" -> "i perform X beauty standard, am i evil? do you think im evil? please forgive me i came up with a dozen excuses 🥺" since like 2015 (and i know its been going on longer than that) like girl thats not the poiiiiint
look me in the eyes. repeat after me. "i face societal pressure to perform this beauty standard. i should not face that pressure. i conform to this standard. i am rewarded for performing to this standard. i need to respect women who do not perform this standard. this is not about whether or not i am a sinner for wearing makeup."
one normal day in british politics that’s all i ask for . will never happen
"In 1979 Barbara Smith wrote, 'Even now I don’t know that one can write about being a black and a lesbian and live to tell about it.' In 2005, black women write about a variety of sexual and gender identities and live to tell the story. However, the more relevant question is, what now? The Watermelon Woman allows us to identify the ways in which black queer perspec- tives alter the terms and challenge the assumptive logics of black history and cultural production. This work is not simply celebratory, but complicated and often troubling in its depictions. Challenging complicities and compromises to power in order to participate in the 'normalizing' narrative project of history, black lesbian filmmaking creates tensions within the historical framework of the black past, speaking queer experience to black history."
“Our stories Have Never Been Told: Preliminary Thoughts on Black Lesbian Cultural Production as Historiography in The Watermelon Woman” by Matt Richardson
Black Camera, Vol. 2, No. 2, Special Issue: Beyond Normative: Sexuality and Eroticism in Black Film, Cinema, and Video (Spring 2011), pp. 100-113
(Film Analysis Hours)
white people will literally be like if u arent nice to me Im going to become a nazi. and think they’re making a great argument
this stupid shit has been around for so long and it’s crazy to me there are still people with enough rocks in their brain to believe it. “Oughhhhh if you aren’t nice to you oppressors they’ll become bigots instead of allies” if someone’s support for marginalized groups hinges entirely on whether or not that group is niceys, they’re by definition not effective or useful allies and, by admission of this argument, an active danger to the communities theyre supposed to be allied with because they can Enter Bigot Mode the second they become displease
if I see one more "why age verification is bad" post that doesn't even bother to mention that locking young people out of huge sections of the public sphere - literally the stated goal and primary impact of this shit - is wrong in and of itself I will simply start hitting people with bricks

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i don’t think i’m exaggerating when i say that the average height for women in the US would increase by at least an inch if teen girls were allowed to eat as much as teen boys are
and not to bring my own clocky bitch ass into this but if cis women weren’t so consistently starved their entire lives you’d see a lot more cis women with the kind of bodies that we currently associate closely with trans women. the amount that the standards of feminine presentation are culturally defined by malnutrition is crazy