preeminent scholar in seinfeld studies

But I’m a creek. I’m a weird flow.

thank god for breasts *remembers im atheist* thank science for breasts

jake and logan paul will die by each other's hand outside the city walls of westlake ohio like eteocles and polynices outside the walls of thebes

Yahhh I have to build Rome. Yup it’s due tomorrow.. noo I haven’t started yet haha is that bad?

(smugly) actually all narration is unreliable because language can only ever communicate through approximation

Is willy wanka still alive IRL cuz if no that timothy shallemet shit is direspectful as fuck

every day i wake up and praise the transmasc homo habilis who first informed women that we could have sex with each other 2.4 million years ago