There's a toxic trend online where clinical neurodivergence gets treated as a character flaw. With a psychology degree and two Cluster B personality disorders (ASPD and NPD), I know exactly how dehumanizing it is to be pushed to "perform recovery", to be told to hide or apologize for traits you never chose.
The truth is, personality disorders are complex, shaped by both biology and environment, and they're not moral failings. Forcing someone to "fix" themselves just to be accepted has nothing to do with safety. It's systemic sanism, and it needs to be called out for what it is, every time.
So-called "mental health advocates" often only support people whose trauma fits a neat, comfortable script, but real clinical presentations (especially Cluster B) rarely fit those boxes, and traits like reduced empathy, impulsivity, flat affect, or stigmatized symptoms like homicidal ideation aren't choices; they're clinical facts. The moment someone speaks honestly about numbness, lack of remorse, or scary thoughts, all support vanishes, and suddenly they're a monster. This isn't about safety at all; it's about control and erasing the messy truths of personality disorders, and that isolation makes it easy to target anyone with these diagnoses. I've seen it play out again and again:
Harassers demand guilt, remorse, or shame from people whose brains just aren't wired for those feelings, and with Cluster B disorders like ASPD, empathy and guilt can be dulled or even absent. Sometimes, symptoms like homicidal thoughts or total emotional numbness show up, and when someone owns these realities, their honesty gets twisted into "proof" they're dangerous, when these are clinical truths.
Apologies become traps. Say sorry, and it's dismissed as manipulative or fake, especially if you have ASPD or NPD and can't feel guilt like others do; but refuse to apologize, and you're branded unrepentant or beyond help. It's a rigged game that's never about resolving conflict, just exclusion and power.
These so-called protectors stalk, harass, and dig into your private clinical info while pretending to defend the community, but in reality, it's projection: they accuse others of the very behaviors they commit, and their harassment is often more abusive than what they claim to oppose. They smear your name for mentioning symptoms, then mimic your traits to claim your strength; they'll call you arrogant for being honest, but act even worse themselves, casting themselves as victims, stirring up hostility, and encouraging pile-ons. They dig for "evidence" in every word you say, trample boundaries, and invade your privacy, not for justice, but to erase your identity and steal your story. That's not advocacy; it's psychological violence, and I've lived it.
It's hypocritical to demand empathy and respect, then dehumanize people whose brains just don't work the way yours does; that's classic sanism, and calling harassment "community safety" doesn't sanitize it.
Callout culture feeds on outrage and rarely checks facts or clinical realities. Once you're targeted, almost nobody verifies accusations, and you become a social outcast, with no apology ever enough. Show remorse without being able to feel it, and you're accused of faking; refuse to apologize, and you're hounded for years while your harassers play hero. This isn't about safety or justice. It's bullying dressed up as virtue, and if we care about real inclusion, clinical evidence needs to matter as much as feelings do.
If mental health awareness only covers people who fit a narrow script, it's not awareness at all; it's exclusion. True awareness means making space for every lived experience, even when it challenges comfort or shatters the savior narrative, because anything less is just erasure by another name.
