Today is Aromantic Awareness Day(in some places)
Which, ngl, makes it really funny to me that I'm posting this so late in the day. Considering that I'm Aromantic.
Aromantic is one of the things that the "A" in LGBTQIA+ stands for, alongside Asexual, Agender, Aplatonic, and probably a whole host of other things. It is generally defined as a lack of romantic attraction.
Please note: A Lack of romantic attraction does not mean a Complete lack, nor does it mean that Aromantic people Never enter into romantic or semi-romantic relationships.
There is a lot of conflation between Aromantic and Asexual as they both refer to a lack of attraction. Instead of arguing that one is more or less valid or legit than the other, or that they mean they same thing, I ask you to consider this: how many times have you looked at an attractive individual (such as a celebrity or character in media) and had sexual thoughts? Have you genuinely thought, in every case, that you would want to be in a romantic relationship with them? Or did you just think that they were hot.
In A-Spec communities you will often see the prefix "Allo" used similarly to the term "Cis", it helps clarify what things you experience.
The Aromantic Community uses a lot of micro-labels, due to how varied experiences can be. Some common ones are:
Aroflux, which describes romantic attraction that fluctuates;
Cupio or Kalos -romantic, a person who doesn't experience romantic attraction but desires to be in a romantic relationship;
Demiromantic, used by people who only feel romantic attraction after developing an emotional bond with someone;
Fictoromantic, people who only feel romantic attraction towards fictional characters;
Fray/Ignota/Protoromantic, which describes people who only feel romantic attraction towards strangers, and for whom it fades upon becoming more familiar;
Greyromantic, used by people who do feel romantic attraction but rarely, weakly, or unreliably. Occasionally it can be used as an umbrella term for other Aromantic orientations;
Loveless Aromantic, used by people who feel disconnected from the idea of love, do not experience love, or who reject love for themself;
Recipromantic, someone who only feels romantic attraction if they know the other person is romantically attracted to them first;
Romo Aro, an umbrella term for people who identify as aromantic but occasionally experience romantic attraction.
The Aromantic Community frequently gets questioned as to whether or not we "count" as queer, and if we should be included in the acronym. To this I say, I don't have to justify my experiences to you. Whether you like it or not, we exist.
There is so much to learn and to talk about concerning the Aromantic experience, I encourage everyone to take a look through the aromantic tag here on Tumblr. Additionally, you can look through the AUREA website at aromanticism.org
Further, the Black Aromantic Community gets left in the shadows far too frequently. I cannot speak on the experiences of Black Aromantics but I do know that combining Arophobia, Allonormativity, and Racism can only lead to disaster. That being said, here are some statements from Black Aros:
"Being black and Aromantic is an experience. When I came out through social media my family felt the need to drill me with questions about my past romantic relationships and why now all a sudden, I’d chosen to go by Aro. I remember talks of bandwagons, even though I can count the number of aro-spec black people I’ve met on one hand with like three fingers. In church when my oldest sister led the prayer, she alluded to how younger kids had so many demons they had to fight, and I instantly knew what she meant. Subsequently, my being Aro had become a thing to pray off and use as a talking point in Sunday school rather than being discussed on a deeper and serious level with just myself. But when we did speak about it the conversations felt like an interrogation. It always felt like black culture couldn’t align much with Aromanticism, especially cause growing up I was taught that marriage was the end goal and that’s what I should want but I don’t think marriage was in my plans. I would dream of having dogs and living alone in a big house instead of having a romantic partner." -From Being Aroflux and Black by Kimberly Butler (I found this Here, but the actual Article is Here)(emphasis by @/stemmehistorian)
I have shied away from claiming the word “aromantic” as mine for about four years now, for a couple of different reasons.
4.) I didn’t see or know of any Black Aromantics, and so thought it was impossible for us to exist. Visibility is important. I had very much bought into the concept of “Black Love” and the only aromantic people I saw where whyte folx and NBPOC (mostly asian) and so I thought aromanticism was diametrically opposed to Blackness as a construct." -From "hello! from a Black Aromantic" by idk just words yameen on wordpress.com
And here is a masterpost by @/stemmehistorian of more Black Aro Texts.
I'd also like to encourage people to follow (or at least scroll through) the blogs of @blkaroculture and @creatingblackcharacters
ALSO ALSO! Take a look at this cool flag by @aromantic-flag-survey! Made to match/go with a new asexual flag by @/_aceingrace_ over on insta!
There is also this Aromantic flag made to include Black experiences by @/hockeyambassador.
