#ninth step

I‘m sorry for those I’ve caused harm to and I just want those who don’t know I am not that person anymore. Im not perfect but I’ve changed and worked so hard with the guidance of my higher power and the loving kindness of those in my life.

And I just finished my amends letter to my ex husband. It wasn’t fun to write but now my side of that street is clean. Feels... I’m not sure exactly but definitely that a weight has been let go.

The process involves others to a greater degree than the rest of the steps but it's still centered on the self: I am practicing taking responsibility for my actions REGARDLESS OF THE OUTCOME of the exchange with that person. I must think of the potential impact on them so that my amends doesn't make more harm but otherwise it's just like sharing in a meeting: I send it into the universe and am thereby lightened/unburdened. Ultimately I learn that I always have a choice about how to respond to Life on Life's terms. And that builds me a healthier life going forward.

Nap time.