#internal world

-alyzed(left) and -stallized(right) (the bottom ones don't mean anything, and are just examples of the templates colored)

-alyzed(from catalyzed): A suffix intended to be the subsystem, subgroup, etc. equivalent of "-formed". It refers to how or why a specific subsystem, subgroup, etc. formed, view themselves as having formed, and/or are viewed by others in-system. For example 'Stressalyzed', would refer to a subsystem, subgroup, etc. that formed because alter(s) or the (sub)system as a whole was under stress.

They can also have to do with the subsystem's, subgroup's, etc. feeling about why they exist. For example, an introjected subsystem who died in source may consider themselves to have been reborn into the system, and as such consider themselves 'phoenixalyzed' ,or similar.

-stallized (from crystallized): A suffix intended to be the layer, area, inner world structure, etc. equivalent of "-formed". It refers to how or why a specific layer, area, inner world structure, etc. formed, and/or are viewed by those in-system. For example 'Stresstallized', would refer to a layer, area, inner world structure, etc. that formed because alter(s) or the (sub)system as a whole was under stress.

They can be literal, metaphorical, or something in between.

i f E e l

a l o n é

in a N

a b A n d o n E d

h o m e

k i n D a w ã Y

A loss can impact someones life,

Their senses change through out the time.

They're in denial, stress and pain,

"This can't be happening" is what they say.

Everything seems too bright,

Their sight becomes sensitive to the light.

Like it's blinding them to see through the pain,

Only focusing on what's making them insane.

Sounds can be too loud,

Their blood boiling to the sound.

Just a single reminder of the past,

They get anger because of the guilt they still have.

They can get violent sometimes,

Shattering what they can.

Can sometimes get physical,

They don't realize it till it hurts someone else too.

In dinner they eat,

For them it's tasteless.

Just bitter down the throat,

Trying to get through it all.

In their mind's they talk,

Bargaining to themselves,

"If only..." And "if they haven't..."

They blame themselves and blame others,

Just bargaining over and over.

Their minds working like a machine,

Not stopping because of the grief.

Then they happen to smell a familiar scent,

Something that triggers past events.

Before the grief came your perfume filled the air,

Now that's gone, toxicity is all that's there.

Depression arise while in a room dimly lit,

They clutch your perfume not wanting to forget your scent.

It's sweet and warm,

Tears falling to their cheeks.

Depress from grief,

It's hard to be in peace.

But reality hits,

They won't ever come back.

Their skin still hypersensitive,

Your touch still lingers.

Every hug is painful,

Knowing it will never be your arms.

But acceptance is all that's left,

They shouldn't fall through the cracks.

I'll look back to the past,

Remember every touch.

Knowing you'll be there,

the energy I'm trying to cultivate: master of your internal world and ruler of your emotional landscape. ✨