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MBTI Expectation vs. Reality
Expectation:
Feeling type: Is always crying for nothing and everything.
Thinking type: cold robot that can't feel any emotions and is mean.
Reality:
Feeling type: "Don't hurt the potato chip! It has a SOULLLLL!!!!"
Thinking type: "it's a fuCKING POTATO CHIP?!?!?!"
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Just read your IXTJs being IXTJs post. Reminds me of how seamless and easy it is to converse and make plans with other XXTJs. I just recently tried putting something together with an ESFP close friend of mine, and he doesn’t even want to give me at least a hint of time or any kind of schedule – he just says “just trust me, I’ll get it to you”. And I’m like, eisuebdjuxrhid it’s difficult for me to naturally do that can’t you just give me at least an estimate of time? He refuses. - INTJ
Oh, I get the struggle. To be fair, these pseudo-science theories can actually help understanding how different people have different minds that work in diverse ways. When I spot xxFPs I try to focus on the advantages of their spontaneity rather than on the downsides. You can be the one setting the major points of a schedule (or just abstractly having them in mind if the xxFP gets overwhelmed by too many plans) and see what they provide you that you lack. I mean, as long as their laxity does not imply irresponsibility when results affect you, I’d try not to stress too much about it – better for you!
– your fellow INTJ
Feeling/Thinking Kindness
I feel like a lot of people mix up “Feeling” (16 personality types) and being kind, and then “Thinking” (16 personality types) for being unkind.
I am an INTJ, Thinking, not Feeling. But that doesn’t mean I’m a horrible person who is unkind. I am a very nice person, I care for those around me, even if I don’t really understand and use emotions that well. (I use my mind to think up ways to help them solve the problem instead of helping them cope with emotions.) Thinking and Feeling are how you make decisions, not your moral values. I see how Feeling can be attributed to kindness, you use your emotions to want to help someone. But, just because I use the more logical response to things, that doesn’t mean I don’t help or care about people! It just means that when I’m making decisions, I just use my mind instead of my heart most of the time. (And sometimes, the more logical response would be to help someone.)
This doesn’t mean that there aren’t unkind Thinking, or kind Feeling, what I’m getting at is that Thinking doesn’t make you mean, and Feeling doesn’t make you kind. (I’ve met very unkind F’s and very kind T’s.)
The 16 personality system represents your personality, some personality types may be more inclined to be more nice, but it doesn’t mean that all of a certain personality type are mean. 16 personality types distinguishes you personality, not your moral values.
since feeling is first who pays any attention to the syntax of things will never wholly kiss you;
E.E. Cummings
A woman who we need, and who makes us suffer, arouses in us a series of feelings far more profound and far more intense than does an unusually gifted man who interests us.
Marcel Proust, Finding Time Again, translated by Ian Patterson, p. 216.
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Sometimes to protect myself from feeling negativity in general, I suppress my "feeling" side of me and let my "thinking" side through. It appalls me just how cold I can become.
I hate when feelers feel self conscious about their competence around me. No, being a feeler does not mean you're dumb and completely irrational. You don't have to impress me with big words and extensive vocabulary. I am an INTP. We value creative thought above an IQ of 150.
In this episode of Epiphany, Maira Kalman finds inspiration while walking the city streets and veering off the prescribed path.
(Definitivamente me hace falta empezar a caminar. Importante no aburrirme por más de un minuto.)
