#aspec vent

Aplatonic alloromantic spec culture is that I will never understand.

I'm a HOPELESS romantic but aplatonic so it's hard to not get a little upset when I see stuff like "No EVERYTHING has to be romantic 🙄" or "I think XYZ is just platonic and that type of love can be deep too"

But to me everything IS romantic. I'm not trying to say that aro people can't be upset about that because believe me I get it (in the platonic way) but damn it makes me feel bad when aro people push romantic aside for platonic love. We both have our own struggles and I'm not saying mines worse, I block or ignore people who say general stuff like that cuz it doesn't hurt me and they have every right to have aro pride💚💚🤍🩶🖤... BUT

I'm so sick and tired of people who say that it's wrong or bad or that I'm making everything too romantic or taking away an opportunity for aro rep. It's not my fault I see everything as romantic and literally CAN'T feel platonic affection the way you do (or at all). It's already hard enough for me to interact with people because of this; I don't need to be forced to understand platonic love. I'm sorry.

I encourage everybody to listen to Aplatonic people about the deconstruction of relationship and social norms, just to understand the perspective.

I'm proud to be Apl-allo 💜💙💚🤍

Funny thing, I actually thought everyone else were the weird ones for wanting to be in a relationship. We were...12? 13? I didn't get it. Thought it was gross

In my mind, I was just like, we are babies! Little babies! Why do you want to kiss?? But, I also had the mentality that everyone is weird in their own ways, and if everyone is weird, then everyone is normal

So, kissing: gross, disgusting, weird, normal

And myself: the odd one out, normal

what the fuck is the deal with you guys equating romance to empathy

i am one of the most empathetic people i know

but i dont feel romantic attraction

and all of the sudden i am cold and heartless

it does not matter that i go to every food drive i can to help distribute food

or that i have told my mom about some things that are often overlooked (IE: homeless ppl, education quality, suicide rate, etc.) and begged her to use her political influence to do something about it

or that i always treat everyone with the same level of respect and give them equal opportunity in almost all situations (not like murderers or rapists cus fuck those guys)

or that nobody had even noticed that i was aro and i was always told that i had "the biggest heart I've ever seen" by others who then turn around and call me cold and heartless when i come out to them instead of giving me even 1% of the respect i gave them

why are you so insistent on oxytocin's being released in certain scenarios being the only thing that matters in this world

when you donate to a charity, you don't need to want to marry the recipients of the funds to go through with it, but when i don't want to marry them or anybody for that matter i am incapable of empathy???

and then when they realize that i did not come out as ace and am an aroallo they get even worse

one person (online thank god because otherwise i would be in jail for beating them to a pulp) said that because i wanted sex but not romance i was basically a rapist

how in the kentucky fried fuck does my not getting crushes mean that i am a rapist

I am friends with some victims of rape and the fact that people would think of me so lowly just because i was not like them to assume that i would do that to somebody, that i would make them feel that unique pain that i had to see my best friend's brother go through and never quite leave behind, all because i was different

because i felt enough trust and comfort in them to allow them to know this

because i am me

to any allos reading this, please please please never do any of these things to someone

i really wish i were one of you guys because it seems soooo nice and the idea of being in love looks like drinking ambrosia to me, but if this is what it does to people, then maybe i should be glad that i dodged that ICBM

i did not choose to be like this, and i would not if given the choice, so please, treat me with some basic human decency instead of treating me like scum