#queerplatonic

“You do the same,” Rebecca retorted. Of Laurie’s two preferred methods, Rebecca had chosen the one that didn’t rely on her charming her way into strangers’ homes. She didn’t like it. She didn’t have Laurie’s innocent elegance, and, well… She was more of a flirt than Laurie. It was hard, having to choose between kissing and biting. And as a vampire the line between people being genuinely charmed by her or falling under her Sway seemed so thin. Too thin. Besides, she could never forget the first time she had fed. Not from Laurie, but the first time she had fed to still the hunger. It had been satisfying to see the fear on the face of the man that had chucked that bottle at her head. She had laughed at the irony of someone so vile still tasting good.

“There are better ways—” Laurie began, but Rebecca interrupted her.

“Why does it matter?” she demanded, sitting back and letting her knees lower, shaking off Laurie’s hands. The way Laurie was looking at her made her squirm inwardly, but she refused to feel guilty. She didn’t feel guilty. Not for those people, not for turning predators into prey for once. She doesn’t kill, she didn’t maim, she didn’t overdrink. She just made the threat on the streets a little more equal.

“It matters,” Laurie said earnestly. “Because it’s not good for you.” Before Rebecca could argue she grabbed her hands and said pleadingly: “You’re so low, Rebecca. And it gets worse after you’ve drunk, I’ve seen it happen. Feeding is supposed to make us feel better. It should be…a positive thing.” Her dark eyes were large and concerned. “I am not blaming you. For anything. But you are exclusively feeding in violence and maybe… Maybe you shouldn’t.”

Rebecca looked down at Laurie’s hands clasping her. They were still paler than hers, always had been, always would.

“We have to feed,” Laurie said quietly. “But however we do it, it has consequences. Every time you hunt, you seek out the absolute worst among the people around us. The exceptions. I feel like you’re starting to forget that they are exceptions. I’m just worried, Becca. I don’t want you to—” She fell silent for a moment. “I want you to be happy.”

It was impossible to argue with Laurie’s affection. Rebecca still wouldn’t meet her eyes, but she couldn’t help thinking that Laurie might be right. She didn’t enjoy hunting anymore. Not really. As soon as the high wore off the idea of it repulsed her. “Then what am I supposed to do?” she said. Her voice sounded rough.

Laurie squeezed her hands and Rebecca finally lifted up her eyes to look at her. “You could feed on animals,” Laurie said seriously.

Rebecca frowned. Laurie couldn’t stand the thought of feeding on animals. “You hate that.”

“What’s right for me isn’t necessarily what’s right for you, Becca,” Laurie said gently.

Drinking from animals had never been as distasteful to Rebecca as it was to Laurie. She had done it before, when they were in more rural areas. It had never occurred to her to drink nothing but animal blood though.

“Animal blood isn’t as potent as a human’s,” Laurie said, cautiously gauging Rebecca’s reaction as she spoke. “But you can drink from me if you ever need to get your strength up.”

She sounded so careful and worried that Rebecca made an effort to grin. “That sounds like bribery to me.”

A smile flashed on Laurie’s face. “You know you only ever have to ask,” she said affectionately.

Rebecca nodded silently and considered it. Maybe… Maybe this would be better. At least for now. She could just try it out. “Okay,” she said, meeting Laurie’s eyes again. “Alright.”

Laurie looked so relieved her entire face seemed to light up. “Thank you,” she said, lunging forward and wrapping Rebecca in a hug.

Rebecca wanted to argue, because it really shouldn’t be Laurie being thankful, but instead she just hugged back and muttered: “Thanks for looking out for me.”

Laurie pulled away and nodded, eyes glistening rather damply. “Let’s both not to do that anymore.”

“Hey,” Rebecca said, raising her eyebrows. “What happened to ‘what is right for me isn’t right for you’, hm?”

Laurie puffed up her chest a little, searching for a retort. “Well…” she said. “What’s bad for you is bad for me too.”

Once again, Rebecca didn’t argue, she just smiled.