important crow business

When asked "what do you want to be when you grow up?" 89% of children ages 6-18 responded 'warrior-poet'. The remaining 11% was some other boring shit

one time in college i was in a creative writing class and this guy was holding up the critique with what i can only describe as like cinemasins dinging another student's writing. and at some point the professor said "the plot is the fork and the prose is the meal. you are critiquing the taste of the fork"

i bet it feels good as fuck to feel good

its kind of fun to uninstall programs you arent using to free up space and see them all beg for their lives

*puts my hand on your shoulder* Don’t worry, I have your back. We’re gonna turn this crisis into a crwaswas

humans should be able to do a special Ultra Sleep after major life accomplishments where you're just out for like 32 hours or something and then you wake up fully refreshed in every way

All "takes" on this blog reflect real policy that will come to pass in the dark era of my rule

it’s so magical and beautiful that there are sprawling interconnected cave systems carved deep into the earth by various geological forces and you don’t have to go in them. there are miles and miles of stone passageways in total darkness that require you to exhale all the air out of your lungs to squeeze through parts of them and you don’t have to be there. some of these squeezes are underwater and require cave divers to take off their oxygen tanks and push them through ahead of them and me i am above ground looking at the sky as we speak. there are untold subterranean wonders no human has ever seen and i will not be the one to discover them #grateful #blessed

you have a headache because you have powers

For the thought crime of experiencing optimism you have been sentenced to five years of propeller hat and rainbow lollipop

listen to me, this is so so important: you've gotta get used to really giving it your 60% as a default. like don't half-ass it necessarily but try not to go over 70% or so of an ass. you'll feel better and live a happier more fulfilled life, and on the rare occasions where you do need to lock the fuck in you'll be able to pull off bullshit that the sad miserable wretches giving it their 100% can never dream of, because they're busy draining themselves dry and you have energy reserves to spare.

she asked what it felt like to be a brockhampton fan in 2017 i said not everything feels like something else

this website is always finding new and exciting ways to prove this image true