i will not be having an ipad baby. i will be having a Pea baby

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i will not be having an ipad baby. i will be having a Pea baby

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joyscrolling on tumblr.com

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pre-fame hozier tweeting this casually in 2012 like it isn’t the best fucking joke i’ve ever heard in my life, decimating all my brain cells instantly
The Lesbian Carjackers
Above is one of the few existing photographs of a lesbian couple that committed a series of carjackings across the United States in the early 1990s. According to found diary entries and family testimonies, the couple met one summer at a Christian based summer camp and would soon begin a passionate affair. Once returning to their respective homes, the couple would exchange letters which soon turned to plotting their escape from their conservative households to the relative safety of suburban Canada.
In September of 1993, one of the women stole the first car in their collective home state of Florida. She then drove through the night to reach the other's town approximately 3 hours north. The two then began their cycle which would continue relatively unnoticed for nearly a month. According to police records of reported missing cars, the couple was in no rush in their crime, and would frequently use wallets found in stolen cars to rent expensive hotel rooms in cities out of the way from their planned destination. Police would often find missing vehicles without gas, implying the couple would simply move on once it ran out. It is believed the couple reached the Canadian border in early November of the same year.
This photo was emailed to a close friend over a year later. It is believed the two legally changed names once settled which has led to inability to track any potential whereabouts. Canada legalized same-sex marriage in 2005 which sparked new interest in the case when many claimed to have seen the couple formalizing their marriage in a government building outside of Toronto.
idk why but this is very amusing to me. got bored with the small and nearby, looking for the large and very far away now.
im losing my mind

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I am home from work and I am pooping on the toilet now
No one taught me how
let me show you
bad post guys
I don't think there's a single nation with more right to this proverb than Haiti
This hit my brain like that hurtling baseball exploded that bird that one time
Castle Rat print by Alexey Gorboot

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THE LORD OF THE RINGS: THE FELLOWSHIP OF THE RING 2001 | dir. Peter Jackson
Link / Link
“How would a chicken wear pants?”
- Richard Beale, 1784
Thank you, Richard Beale, for making our opinion of the past slightly more ridiculous.