wadda hell......squirble

i have not been poisoned by a witch

[damage noise]

[damage noise]

[damage noise]

[damage noise]

There is so much story telling here. A person got this pacific parrotlet named it Bruce which in and of itself is amazing but then this person went here my little bird friend a raspbebe for you to enjoy and Bruce said hell yeah and went cataclysmicly and irreversible ape shit ham on that berry. And that probably happened more than once. So instead of never again allowing this little dinosaur the joy of the succulent flesh of the delectable raspberry they went what can we do for our little baby boy. and then boom they got some kind of cake cover type deal and cut a door into it so that Bruce would Not Be Trapped in a fruit prison (altho truely it is the berries who are trapped in there with Bruce but none the less) and so he may go to his pent house and freak it as crazily as his little bird heart desires.

And also when he gets up to other mischief

However, THIS is my favorite Bruce photo

this cat serves cunt on a silver plate with gold filigree

so i'm at petsmart paying the invoice for my cat's nail trim, and the cashier is staring at me as he taps in the phone number. it brings up my mom's name and i kind of wanted to assure him my name wasn't carolyn so i went "haha, that's my mother. motheeeer." in what was apparently a distinctive and recognizable voice because he went, "you know, that's so weird, because i was just thinking i'm gonna watch all the toy story movies tonight. how did you know that?"

i don't even know that reference because i haven't seen all the toy story movies and it's been years anyway, so i definitely didn't know that but i'm just here like, "haha oh, yeah, i'm a little psychic, sorry." just a laugh y'know little things can be brushed off.

but he goes, "what color am i thinking of?"

in my head i'm immediately like purple but i tend to second guess myself so i went "uhh, hm. green." and he went "nope, close," and despite it not being anywhere close to green i just went, "oh, so it WAS purple."

and he FREEZES. and he's like. "...it was green first but i changed it to purple."

so i'm like "...i thought purple first and changed it to green. nice."

so that was apparently him trying to dodge my psychic beam and me trying to spare him but we intersected anyway. my jimmies are thoroughly rustled by this point.

but then he's like, "alright, what number am i thinking of between 1-10."

i don't hesitate this time before i look him in the eyes and say, "3. or 4, i guess." because again i always just give an additional option just in case usually to deter suspicion which. didn't work because he got so quiet and shrank a little like "...it was 3. i don't think i like this game anymore."