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Enjoying the view and the sounds

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I had to get a step stool to reach him because YUP, he was stuck
being an early bird is soooo awesome taking the longest slowest most leisurely start to the day and it is now 8:25am
And this is of course not even mentioning the worm
My parents are giving updates on momâs cancer treatment and testing. And itâs generally just hard to parse how both of them text.
My mom loves to use ellipses and fragmented sentences, my dad likes to ramble and not actually say anything of substance.
While struggling through the typos and wretched grammar I stopped dead when I saw my dad, instead of saying, âcaveatâ had written: âThereâs one caviar.â
Todayâs update is a head scratcher because Iâm not actually sure what she was trying to say.
For context, sheâs getting released from round two of chemo. To that end they have given her a port to easily give medication and take her blood. Thatâs just gonna stay in for a while. Those are the things I know.
So she lets me know sheâs home. This text reads, âIâm home, sweetâ
Then she texts a photo of a pile of figs and adds âlike figsâ. âBumper cropâ (my mom has never understood the meaning of a bumper crop and Iâm not gonna go there)
At this point Iâm not sure if sheâs offering figs or being home is⌠sweet like figs? Maybe both.
Then she says, âI have been assimatedâ
The photo that follows is her chest, presumably showing off her new port.
But my wife and I canât stop laughing. What the fuck is assimated? We donât know.
My wife thinks sheâs telling us that it means sheâs pooping.
âAssassinated? Assimilated? Like into the borg?â I ventured.
âThat would be a wild joke from someone whoâs never watched Star Trek.â
Honestly, itâs anyoneâs guess.
I had to know and I caved and finally asked for clarification and she did mean sheâd been assimilated into the Borg!
Assimated still makes me laugh.
wait, Derin how did your leaving make the hospital shut down?
I used to work as a live-in nanny for a pediatrician.
Now, the thing about hospitals in my country is that they are massively understaffed and massively underfunded. This is especially true outside the major cities. The staff are worked to the bone and receive little to no help in things like finding accommodation or childcare, making working in rural areas a very uninviting prospect; staff come out here, get lumped with the work of three people (because there's nobody else to do it), burn out under the workload and leave, meaning that those remaining have even more work because that person is gone. It's unsustainable and the medical staff are doing their best to sustain it, because people die if they don't, so to the higher-ups it looks like everything's getting done and therefore everything is fine.
My friend (and boss) worked one week on, one week off, swapping out with another pediatrician. This was necessary because it would not be physically possible for one person to handle the workload for longer periods of time. The one single pediatrician had to hold up the entire pediatrics ward, which was not only the only public hospital pediatrics ward in our town, but also the one that served all the towns around us for a few hours' drive in all directions. I regularly saw her go to work sick, aching, tired, or with a debilitating 'I can barely make words or see' level migraine, because if she took a day off, twenty children didn't get healthcare that day, and some of these kids' appointments were scheduled weeks in advance. She'd work long hours in the day and then be called in a couple of times overnight for an hour or two at a time (she was on-call at night too, because somebody had to be), and then go in the next day. Sometimes she would be forced to take a day off because she physically could not stay awake for longer than a few minutes at a time, meaning she couldn't drive to work.
Cue my niece's second birthday coming up in Melbourne. I'd been working for her for about 3 years, and she (and the hospital) had plenty of advance warning that I (and therefore she) needed one (1) Friday off. That's fine, we'll find someone to work that Friday, the hospital said. Right up until the last week where they're like "oh, we can't find a replacement; you can come in, can't you?"
No, she tells them; I don't have anyone to watch my kid that day.
Oh, surely you can hire a babysitter for this one day, they say. Think of the children! We really really need you to work that day. I know we said it'd be fine but we need you now, there's no one else to do it.
There are no other babysitters, she told them. Unless you can find one?
That's not our responsibility, they said.
But I'm not changing my plans, she's got plans by now as well, the hospital knew about this one day weeks in advance, and with absolutely no reserve staff they're forced to reschedule all pediatrics appointments for that Friday. Not a huge deal, it happens on the 'physically too overworked to get out of bed' days too. I go to Melbourne, she goes back to her home in Adelaide for her recovery week, all should be on track.
My niece gives me Covid.
This was way back in the first wave of the pandemic, and there were no Covid vaccines yet. The rules were isolate, mask up, hope. I had Covid in the house, and it would've been madness for my friend and her toddler to come back into the Covid house instead of staying in Adelaide. There was absolutely no way that a pediatrician could live with someone in quarantine due to Covid and go to work in the hospital with sick children every day. And no support existed for finding another babysitter, or temporary accommodation, so the hospital was down a pediatrician.
The other pediatrician wasn't available to do a three-week stint. They were also trapped in Adelaide on their well-earned week off.
Meaning that the only major pediatrics ward within a several-hour radius had no pediatricians. They had to shut down and send all urgent cases to Adelaide for the week. To the complete absence of surprise of any of the doctors or nurses; of course this would happen, this was bound to happen, it presumably keeps happening. But probably to the surprise of the higher-ups. After all, the hospital was doing fine, right? Of course all the staff were complaining of overwork and a lack of resources in every meeting, but they could always be fobbed off with the promise of more help sometime in the future; the work was mostly getting done, so the issue couldn't be too urgent.
It's not like some nanny who doesn't even work for the hospital could go out of town for a weekend for the first time in three years, and get the only public pediatrics ward in the area shut down for a week.
This saga does also illustrate something I learned about in library school, which is: when management starts reducing your staffing (or other resources) to the point that it jeopardizes your ability to function, make visible cuts.
Don't stretch yourselves to the breaking point to keep doing as much as possible, and don't cut corners where customers/clients/patients/patrons won't notice. Say out loud, "Due to low funding/staffing, we can no longer do X," where X is something visible but not mission-critical.
In the library world, this is usually a small reduction in hours: we lose an employee position, we stop being open on Sundays, or we close an hour earlier every day. (And we put up signs saying exactly why, and to whom patrons can complain.)
If you say "this isn't enough resources/we're understaffed/we can't go on like this," but then you continue to go on like this? You've just proved that you can indeed go on like this.
Of course, not everyone is in a position where you can make decisions like this--reducing hours, or suspending a particular service; the reason we learn this in library school is that we usually have a clear bright line between operational management and funding. However, you can still ask. Management says, "For now this store is going to have to get by with 6 employees instead of 7," you say, "Okay; what are we going to stop doing, to make that work?"
And if the answer is, "Nothing," you just...let the problems happen. Someone gets sick, and they really need you to come on your day off? Sorry, but you made plans that you can't break (even if those plans are "lay in bed and eat ice cream"). But they can't open the store if you don't come in? Sounds like the store isn't going to be open. Hopefully we'll be able to get up to full staffing before this problem comes up again!
In the story above, the COVID quarantine situation was, of course, unpredictable, but if management had taken the lesson any of the times when appointments had to be cancelled because a doctor called off due to physical exhaustion, perhaps they would have had some options when both of their pediatricians were unavailable due to a global health emergency; who can say?
It can feel like sort of a dick move--to your immediate boss, your coworkers, your patrons/customers/clients/patients/whoever--to say no when it isn't technically absolutely impossible to say yes. But the doctor and the nanny in this story were both right to stick to their guns about this one well-planned and anticipated day off, and the rest was just a cascade of failure that ultimately stems from the decision to intentionally understaff the hospital, and to ignore warning signs of an impending staffing crisis.
And remember, "we can't find people to hire" almost always means "we're not offering a high enough paycheck".

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Sometimes I just randomly think of that time in ATLA where the Northern Water Tribe, previously thought so safe, is under attack by a massive fleet, and theyâre trying to hold the line but there are just too many ships, and the Avatarâs been kidnapped and dragged out into the snow and Sokka and Katara go to rescue him and itâs super dramatic and everyoneâs in danger and theyâre found Aang and heâs SAFE
And Sokka just gets distracted by what good quality rope he was tied up with and decides to keep it.
First, Sokka, your origins growing up in a poor isolated fishing village are showing. Good practicality there.
Second, this is what every DnD character is like.
Why are there just blobs of fake rubber meat that a bunch of unrelated microbes can build in the dirt but they've only ever been found in china and can't be classified any further than "biological objects"
Taisui TS-2007S, a Large Microbial Mat Discovered in Soil in China - PMC
i love you strange bacterial soil meat
Weirds me out that domestic pigs can look like that. I always expect them to look like boars. Not pink and naked.
Strongly and intentionally ignoring all the bullshit that happened in the middle, it's actually probably a very good thing my mom and dad aren't living retired life together, because my mom's version of retired life that she's currently happily living is waking up, having coffee near the lake, then reading and playing iPad games for 14 hours with the dog asleep nearby. And my dad's version of retired life is I get a text from him with a picture of 1,000,000 hot air balloons in the sky with a caption like "At the New Mexico Hot Air Balloon Festival đ" which is a thing that clearly sprung into existence just for this text
Retired dads will text you like âMeeting your tumblr followers at the New Mexico Hot Air Balloon Festival đâ like you were just supposed to know thatâs a thing

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also the thing about "we need to focus on the people most vulnerable, and transmascs may be vulnerable but not more than trans women!" is that it doesn't consider transmasc erasure as an active force.
its a take from the perspective that trans men are "vulnerable" is some vague abstract generalized way, not in a way which would behoove anyone to adjust their behavior or take action on their behalf. its the erasure of erasure; the assumption is that trans men probably have enough resources and support anyways, which could not be farther from the truth. some local communities may have more transmasc-focused resources, but many others do not. transmasculine people are left out of vital conversations, are excluded from vital resources, are ignored and forgotten when they are abused and killed.
it treats transmasc erasure as something which is passive in itself and which can be solved passively. which is erasure itself in action. i do not really give a fuck about "who has it worse," it is not about that. it is about the fact that if YOU do not make an ACTIVE EFFORT to advocate for transmascs, to make transmasc suffering and oppression visible and legible, it will not happen. it simply will not happen.
erasure is an active force. we all internalize transmasculine erasure and we can all easily contribute to it; we are expected to contribute to it. trans men&mascs cannot afford the model of "well we only need to raise awareness for the most vulnerable" because our vulnerability is defined by being ignored.
this is why unlearning anti transmasculinity has to start from (un)learning erasure. once you start to see it as an active force/tool of the patriarchy you realize it is the lynchpin that holds so much (especially intercommunity) anti-transmasculinity together. transmaculine absence is so normalized people experience our presence as an intrusion, and people genuinely do not understand why we would ever need to be more visible than we are. it is fucking everywhere.
like idk i remember reading about a trans man in India who, after he came out to his family, was literally locked in a room in their house. just shut up in a basement somewhere, out of sight and out of mind, until he managed to escape (and even then, there's also a trans man in India whose parents sent the police to track him down and kidnap him from a shelter meant specifically for trans people).
or trans men like Sophie Lederer, who was only 19 when he was arrested for "talking silly and claiming to be a boy" in the early 20th century, and the only other thing I know about him is that he spent the rest of his life, over a decade, institutionalized for his transmasculinity. god only fucking knows what was done to him in those years by his wardens.
that is the image of transmasculine erasure. it is boys and men locked in closets and basements and prison cells disguised as hospital rooms for years until they are dead and buried as women. if they even get a headstone at all. it is dead-eyed mothers with three children who have no income or job experience and are married to a cis man ten years older than them who they know would kill them, and possibly their children, if they even mentioned being trans. if you think of transmasc erasure or "invisibility" and imagine a white cis-passing guy working stealth at his office job, congrats! transmasculine erasure is already living like a fungus in your mind. i am trying to make you feel the horror the patriarchy has trained you out of feeling about the state of transmasculine oppression.
if you've followed me for any length of time you've likely already seen this quote, but i wanna talk about it in this context again:
"Unless they present hyperfeminine, butches donât have access to the job market. You will not be considered if you donât wear nice womenâs clothes. If you set up catering, you will get told, âI am disgusted; a woman who thinks sheâs a man is cooking for me.â So butch lesbians normally have an assistant, or their femme partner if they have one, who is more feminine-looking to run the front so customers donât know a masculine-presenting person is cooking behind the curtains. Many of us become sex workers [due to lack of job opportunities].⌠But then when police raid brothels and homes, the masculine lesbians get treated âlike men.â This means more forceful handcuffing, kneeling, and stripping their shirts off." â Rosa, lesbian and sex worker rights defender El Salvador
i was thinking about this when it comes to how we describe vulnerability in our community, specifically mentioning someone is a "femme" to indicate their need for extra support. i don't know i've ever seen the same be done for butches. i genuinely cannot remember ever really seeing people talk about butches and their economic and social vulnerability, the way i see people talk about femmes.
its not that being feminine doesn't cause genuine vulnerability! but because people have such a binary attitude towards gender (and more broadly), the way we talk about gendered vulnerability leads to this view that feminine people are always more vulnerable than masculine people, that "this femme needs help" to many queers and feminists feels more urgent than "this butch needs help."
the erasure of anti-transmasculinity is so pervasive and harmful and the erasure itself is then erased. and the thing is, the nature of benevolent sexism has always made it that femininity (mediated by race and class and social belonging, amongst other things, Its More Complicated Than That) is seen as inherently vulnerable. people seen as masculine lesbians are "treated like men" in the sense of being treated harsher with more physical violence, while still being subjected to sexual violence out of both misogyny and queerphobia, and also being economically vulnerable because of the disgust aimed at people perceived as masculine women. and who talks about it? not the people who refuse to understand gender oppression through anything other than a binary lens (while pretending that's not what they are doing).
honestly i think on a broader level, we have been seeing the erosion of genuine queer/trans theory for a while in favor of this idea that queerphobia is reducible down to misogyny. & i do think all queerphobia does innately involve misogyny. but i feel there's been this growing aversion to attributing anything to a hostility to gender non-conformity/genderqueerness itself, in favor of attributing it to a hatred of femininity. there is no true analysis of transphobia or misandrogyny as their own forces, its just a side effect of the hatred of femininity.
this is where we get the constant refrain of "the patriarchy likes masculinity, so masculine people are always seen as better than feminine people" & why people may find it incomprehensible that there may be situations where being feminine may be a protective factor in comparison to being masculine.
another example of this from this article:
The trio made their way down a busy street in the Santiago suburb of Pudahuel, close to where Carolina lived with her mother and father. Carolina and Estefania chose not to hold hands to avoid offending anyone. Suddenly, Carolina felt a force to the back of her head. Then darkness. She had fallen unconscious, and would remain in a coma for a week. She suffered a fractured skull, a broken nose, internal bleeding and permanent damage to her hearing. There were two male attackers. One had used a large wooden pole to hit her repeatedly on the back of her head, only stopping when Estefania threw herself on top of Carolina, using her body as a shield. This is significant, says Carolina's mother, Mariela. Because unlike Carolina, who identifies as a camiona and dresses accordingly, Estefania is femme - a more feminine lesbian identity. The attackers targeted Carolina and not Estefania, says Mariela, because she represented an "unacceptable" face of womanhood. It was not just her sexual orientation that prompted violence, it was her appearance as a camiona. "I want to make it very clear they were trying to kill her," she adds. "There is no other way of looking at it. The fact that she is here is a miracle." Carolina knew one of her alleged attackers. "Before this attack he threatened me. He said, 'I am going to kill you.' He said he was going to shoot me with a gun. He called me a lesbian and swore at me. He said, 'Why do you dress like a man?'"
there are people who have been nearly (or successfully) violently murdered for being seen as a masculine woman, while their femme girlfriends were not targeted or were not the main target. but if you reduce everything in patriarchy down to "m > f" you will miss this. and
even in this article, the discussion of violence focuses on lesbianism and misogyny - which, while clearly central to the violence, one has to wonder what becomes of transmasculine individuals who are targeted by this same transphobic lesbophobia, the same transphobic misogyny, whose experiences with violence cannot be made legible through the same narratives as those who identify as women? who cannot appeal to the terms "femicide" and traditional feminist narratives as easily?
i feel like the fact that there is virtually no discussion of how trans men are affected by femicide even when including trans women in the conversation, and how basically every study or systemic review of studies looking at violence against trans men will discuss how little research has been done on this topic, and how the largest global review of studies on violence against transgender people (94 studies, 65,608 participants) found that while nearly all (96%) of the studies included transgender women, just half (49%) included transgender men and less than half (37%) included nonbinary people, should lead us to understand that the picture of how transmasculine people are impacted by transphobic and misogynistic violence is itself violently incomplete.
love the genre of discourse thatâs like âthe world used to be [thing it never was] but now society is [Iâm over thirty]â
evergreen post
jellyfish have to be kept in a round tank because if they're in a tank with corners they'll get stuck in them. I think that's beautiful. god's stupidest little plastic bags (affectionate)
Also when being bred in captivity(this is done at my work and my job is to teach people about it) to get them to reproduce from the polyp stage of life, we have to intentionally cause them enough stress to reproduce but not enough to harm them. Lately weâve done that by cleaning their habitat extra well, makes them think the word is ending
593.5
jellyfish
i dont CARE that its your special interest bitch whats your SOURCE !!!!!!
"source: me ! hahahađĽ°" NO !!!!!!! SOURCE: First Name Middle Initiall. Last Name, Name of Book, (City: Publisher, year) !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
to paraphrase Brandy Jensen (2024), too often these days I find myself in the position of defending someone I think is annoying for using a different citation style, from someone I know is dangerous for not citing their sources at all
_____________
Jensen, B. (2024) "The Polycrisis: Why canât we stop talking about nonmonogamy?" in The Yale Review, Online, 24 April.
Animorphs books be like
Page 1: I am a child soldier. My every waking moment is defined by fear and paranoia. My dreams are full of unprocessed trauma. The fate of the entire world rests on me and my friends. I failed my geography test because I do not know the difference between Equator and Ecuador. Also, I'm really hazy on the difference between geography and geology. Again, the fate of the world rests on my shoulders.
Page 13: <Now THAT is a sexy monkey>
Page 26: *The dopest animal fact you've ever heard*
Page 27: Do you know about thermals? You do? Too bad, I'm going to explain them again.
Page 36: *fart joke fart joke 90's pop culture reference barf joke*
Page 40: Rachel kills someone with her bear hands. Not a typo.
Pages 3,15,16,25,26,30,33,37,40,44,46,50,55,56,57,60: TSEEEEEEEEEEEER!
Page 47: I willed my bones to melt faster. If there was a single bone in my body in the next ten seconds, everyone I ever loved of cared about would die an excruciating death.
Page 50: Funny alien thinks he's people.
Last page: *The gang goes to Burger King to avoid thinking about their war crimes*
#what the fuck is animorphs about
I thought the post made it very clear what Animorphs is about. Thermals mostly.

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#THIS WAD ANIMORPHS???
Occasionally they take breaks to put roaches in Zack Hanson's salad but yeah the entire series is like this.
the increasing tendency in the last few years to use identities and descriptors as defensive statements or like, Marks Of Innocence is. really fucking odd. like, rather than 'I didn't do that and your statement is false', it's 'you're literally attacking a trans person'; i've seen people write 'i'm literally a minor' to try and avoid being held responsible for any type of action. i don't know! i find it really strange. it's possible to be vulnerable or to be from a minority group and also, additionally, be an asshole.
This one time I was reading the notes of a post (I know, I know, NEVER read the notes) where someone was talking about how gender-policing negatively affected both cis and trans women. (The post did not minimise the struggle of trans women specifically at all.) Someone in the notes got incredibly angry that they were âappropriating trans womenâs strugglesâ by bringing up cis women at all, and someone else (not the OP) responded to this âtrans women onlyâ person and called them âsheâ -- their gender hadnât been mentioned or indicated at all, it was a guess, probably weighted by the context of the conversation.
Did this person (who turned out to be a trans man) say, âactually Iâm a guyâ and move on? No. They WENT OFF about how this other person in the comments had âmisgendered meâ, like this understandable wrong guess was a malicious act. The other person apologised and attempted to move on, but oh no, that couldnât happen. This was a clear indication that the other person was evil, daring to misgender a trans person (again, this was a completely unintentional wrong guess that was immediately apologised for and not repeated), and not only that, the OP was evil for âallowing their followers to misgender meâ (the OP had not been involved in this conversation at all, nor was their any indication over whether either participant followed them. It was two random Tumblr users having a discussion in the notes of this one post. Nothing to do with OP). This proved that the OP and this person supporting them were evil transphobes, see, and proved that âall women are negatively affected by gender policingâ was an evil transphobic thing to say and shouldnât be talked about.
Was any of this discussion remotely useful for any purpose? No. It was just a derail of a legitimate discussion by someone deciding to invent new transphobia and misogyny so they could use invented victimisation in their personal game of oppression olympics, instead of usefully discussing the actual transphobia and misogyny that the post was about. Someone using their identity as a trap to try to bully random people on the internet via âI think Coolsville sucksâ-style invented attacks when there are very real transphobes and misogynists out there to focus on instead. All it did was make a bunch of people -- including the person stirring up the drama! -- very angry for no reason.
This is happening all the goddamned time on this website. Itâs impossible to have a useful conversation when people in it keep trying to treat parts of their identity like a team of pokemon to defeat the Possibly Less Oppressed Personâs identity instead of actually discussing the relevant issues.