I’m More Creature Than Human

reblog to slap op with some paper in the wind

It’s making me think of that video where a guy sees a bear on his porch and the guy jumps all startled like “ahh a bear!” and the bear startles at the exact same time like “ahh a man!”

My dog when I tell him to spit out whatever tf he has in his mouth

remember in p.e. when they'd take a bunch of insecure teenagers & be like "today we're going to play basketball" and then not teach you how to play basketball. and then put you in a group with guys who were obsessed with basketball and would get mad at you for not knowing how to play basketball. why did they do that

You gotta give props to Mads Mikkelsen for playing such a pretentious character who constantly talks in metaphors because I know for a fact he didn’t understand at least half of what he was saying, but still slayed that role so hard

psychoanalyzing the gender/identity dichotomy between ice skating and ice hockey and coming to the more objectively correct conclusion that ice hockey is rooted in motherly feminine behavior of protecting the nest and that ice skating is about masculine peacocking of one's own physical prowess in seeking a mate