You sat at the table with your eyes barely open. Time was ticking, but you weren’t moving. Your head was pounding, everything was spinning, you were in a daze. It was hard to see or think straight. You forced yourself to click open the pen, scribbling down what you managed to see, but thinking nothing of what those words meant. As you blinked once, then twice, and the third time, you dropped your pen.
You sighed and pushed away your things, so easy it was, to forget all your responsibilities. You felt your heart dropping. It was late at night, your boyfriend, Jungkook, wasn’t coming home for the weekend. He had dance practices, back to back, and wouldn’t make it in time if he stayed here, with you, where he belonged and where you so desperately wanted him to be. College was tough for you at the moment. You were only two weeks in, and you felt mentally, physically and especially emotionally exhausted. College was extremely different, compared to high school. People just weren’t as friendly or accepting. Even when you talked to someone, the moment the long hand of the clock hit 10 o’ clock, that bond was forgotten. You were lonely, and it was painful to be lonely.
Your teachers weren’t as welcoming either. They kept students at an arm’s length, not wanting to get to know anything more than your name, and probably an answer to a question you obviously didn’t know. Subjects were tough too. Every subject you picked was completely new to you, where else, your other classmates had a gist of it. You felt inferior, lonely, forgotten, unimportant and stupid. So, so, stupid. You weren’t happy anymore. The only person you had right now, was Jungkook. And neither was he here for you to cry into his chest.
You let a tear escape. Then you kept thinking harder, and harder, about everything that went wrong, a tear following every bad thought. Soon, you were bawling into your pillow. Not caring about anything else but your sorrow.
You sat up, immediately, staring at the figure at the door.
“Oh dear, Y/N, what happened? Why are you crying? My love,” he cooed softly.
That just made you weep more. You felt yourself being engulfed, and held together, something you couldn’t do on your own. It was like that for a while, before you had gotten a headache, and realised maybe it was time to stop dwelling on this.
Sniffling, you pulled away from the soft fabric covering your boyfriend’s chest.
“W-why are you home? I thought you were staying with the boys?” you asked.
“Practice was cancelled because Jimin hyung had a really bad cramp and couldn’t continue. We decided to take a break for a few days. But that isn’t important now, what’s important is that you tell me who’s bothering you so I can give them a piece of my mind,” he said.
You shook your head, “It’s nothing, kook. I’m just stressed, exhausted and I’ve just, given up. And thank you, for coming home. I really needed you.”
“Hey, if you ever need me, just call me, okay? I’ll come and get you no matter what. I love you, Y/N. Don’t overwork yourself okay? You can do it, it’s just college-”
“It’s not-not just college. It’s….bad.”
He sighed and smiled lovingly at you. Holding your chin between his thumb and index, he lifted it up so he could kiss you softly.
“I know it’s hard, baby. But nothing’s easy. I know how it feels, as if the whole world is against you, as if you’re powerless, as if you’re nothing. I’ve felt it many times. Especially, in my career, I, no-we, get it a lot. But we have to remember that there’s always, always, something lying ahead of all this. There’s always something to look forward to, whether you know it or not.
Have hope, baby. I know it’s hard to be hopeful right now, but it really helps if you do. And I’ll always be here, cheering you on, comforting you, I’ll be here if you need anything, anything at all.
So when classes start on Monday, I want you to have hope. Have hope for anything that you want. That hope, will make you do things, Y/N. You wouldn’t believe it until you see it happen. You’re an amazing person, baby. You can get through this easily. So don’t be too hard on yourself, alright?”
You bit your lip and smiled.
“Oh god, you have no idea how much I love you, Jeon Jungkook,” you sighed.
He chuckled happily, “Same here, baby. Now, why don’t I get changed and we can cuddle and watch something.”
“Bananas in Pyjamas, please,” you begged.
He kissed your lips and looked at you adoringly.
