zmedêna

things will work out + it’s still early + not everything is lost + trees

Nothing like going to bed. Yay I get blanket time!

Nothing sadder than wake up time. What do you mean I need to leave the kingdom of warms?

the workday/weekend ratio is so off. like ethically.

They should invent sleep that works

vibrators can also help if you have restless legs syndrome! Especially ones with fancy pulse patterns. When my RLS is severe I tuck them behind my knees or wherever & can finally lie still & sleep. You might need to wrap them in fabric to avoid skin irritation ymmv. There was even a paper published somewhere called "counter stimulatory devices for RLS" that was hilariously vague about saying the word "vibrator"

Once again adding also useful if you have dystonia or any kind of muscle spasticity. I have cervical dystonia (neck spasms) and dystonia in my left leg that's essentially like persistent Charley horse cramps from my neuromuscular issues and bought a Hitachi expressly for this purpose lol

A vibrator has been recommended to me to unblock clogged milk ducts for anyone that may apply to

I learned about the sinus thing and immediately bought a vibrator for that purpose. And yes, it DOES help with sinus headaches. 

I use mine to cum as well

Yeah, it'll help with that too...

worst thing about a job is that you have to. keep showing up. like you have to. you gotta.

hey can you come over and surgically remove this heavy, aching rot from my heart? we can watch a movie afterwards

When someone tells me I look tired I don't get offended I'm like thank you for noticing my anguish

#myanguish

(girl who has never told anyone anything) i must just be doing it for attention

the thing that really cheeses my cake about flies getting in my house is they clearly don't want to be there anyway. like at least the ants trying to steal cereal from my pantry had a goal and a plan. you are just here because you're too stupid to use a window twice

hey bro qick question .do i seem like a person to you

hot take but i think cars should be required to have communication radios just like big semi trucks. we should all be able to talk to each other on the road. not bc this would help in any way but because i want it to sound like a counterstrike lobby every time i drive somewgere

phones love to go "do you want to clear up .3 GB by deleting these cherished pictures that you havent looked at in more than 30 days?" while also installing random apps and AI bullshit you didnt ask for. and you cant even uninstall half the apps

Y'all exclusively keep all your cherished photos on your phone?? Without a backup????

burgers are awesome. so are pussies. so you'd think something called the "borgussy" is something very good, but according to my friend Karl Marx such is not the case.