Snitches Stitches

number 2!!

Ingredients:

4x3" piece of felt

1 pipe cleaner

thread/scissors/needle

stuffing (teeny bit)

Just to be really clear, I’m by no means an expert at sewing, I’m very much so a ‘good enough’ kind of sewer. I have made a handful of these and I think it can be really intimidating to get into making them, but they’re a lot more accessible than you may have realized.

I also put it under a cut because it’s long, image heavy, and probably not everyone wants it on their dash.

All you do is take oranges (and grapefruit, in my case, but you could use any citrus fruit, lemon and limes included. You could also do slices of apple or other fruits, but they don’t dry as pretty) and cut them into slim, even slices. Blot the slices as dry as you can get them with paper towel, then lay them flat on drying racks, if you have them, or cookie sheets if you don’t. The cookie sheets will take longer, but will probably produce flatter slices at the end. If you want to, you can take cloves and push them into the slices before you dry them; the oranges should contract around them and hold them in place.

Put these into the oven at 200-220 degrees F (93 C), and bake for at least 4 hours. Check them hourly; it may take up to 7 hours, depending on the thickness of your slices and oven air circulation. Take them out when they no longer feel wet or sticky to the touch. 

A 5 lb bag of navel oranges was enough to garland most of this tree. All you need for that is a thick needle and some string (DMC embroidery floss works well, and is less than a dollar a skein at walmart and other chain stores). You just tie off the first orange, and then use the needle to go in and out each slice near the edges. If you’re making ornaments, check your local dollar store for bits of ribbon, jingle bells, beads or whatever else seems good to you. A hot glue gun is helpful but not necessary; all the ornaments here are just tied together. 

I have plenty of herbs drying in my cupboard, so I also used some sprigs of rosemary and lavender, plus cinnamon sticks, cloves, and allspice. Rosemary is easy to find as live plants in the grocery section, and you can trim some off without killing the plant (and then you have i n f i n i t e  r o s e m a r y). Get creative!

These smell fantastic, and should last multiple seasons if they’re dried allll the way and stored in airtight containers. (I chucked some of the odd bits into my mulling spices, which is lovely.) They’re a very old method of decorating and look beautiful even when they’re not perfect. If you’ve made these before, I’d love to see what you made!

This set– years old now– gets stored in a popcorn tin and has been totally fine even stored in the not-temperature-controlled garage.

These make for fun ornaments, but they’re also edible– they make a nice addition to a mulling spice mix, or to black tea.

The Stunning Astronomical Beadwork of Native Artist Margaret Nazon

Margaret Nazon has spent the past decade building intricate beadwork depictions of outer space. The colorful artworks balance representational and stylized aesthetics set on black fabric backgrounds to depict galaxies, planets, nebulae, and other astronomical phenomena.

Initially inspired by Hubble space telescope images, Nazon’s celestial renderings are part of a lifelong interest in beading. In an interview with Glenbow, the artist shared that she began beading at age 10, but found the density of traditional beadwork to be tedious.

The abstract nature of celestial images allows Nazon to be more interpretive and incorporate different materials like caribou bones and willow seeds that have location-specific or cultural significance. Nazon is Tsiigehtchic, part of the Gwich’in community in what is now the Northwest Territories of Canada. The artist explained that because she is retired, she is able to dedicate significant time to beading, and often rises at 4:30am to begin working. Nazon plans to continue experimenting, including merging her abstract beadwork with her seamstress skills to create artfully embellished apparel.

Nazon’s artwork was most recently exhibited at Glenbow in a group show, Cosmos, and A Beaded Universe at Prince of Wales Northern Heritage Centre. You can read more about her in the Glenbow interview, and explore Nazon’s portfolio on her website.

Control Room, 2004 (embroidery on black velvet) & Space Station, 2006 (embroidery on canvas)

“Oh lord take me, she’s about to do it again!”

“Hath the struggle of keeping your husband’s linens from turning the color of muddy creek water been driving you to utter distraction?”

“Penelope! Get her to stop, will you?”

“I’m elbow deep in lard, Marigold!”

“Down at the General Store, Mr. Pumperkrill has just the product for you and yours.”

“Charity! Where are you, girl!”

“Already coming, Aunty!” *young girl runs down the stairs and quickly taps Maid Joycelen on the forehead six times *

“-nly six days a’fore when the Ferris boys where taking their own late night walk through the Black Bramble Hollar,”

A teeny tiny embroidered bead* lizard for my jacket!

First take a standard rectangular piece of paper (I used one from a small notebook which I ripped out then cut the holes off)

Then fold in half touching the shorter side to the opposite shorter side.

Fold again making the new shorter side touch the other new shorter side

I did this one more time, but this time I unfolded it right after to get back to where it was only folded twice. It should have left a crease in the paper.

Using this crease, fold the corners up alongside it to look like this

This are also going to be unfolded, but this time you’re going to push in alongside the triangular folds you just made and undid.

Doing this once will result in this

Do the other side of you haven’t already to get this

You’ll open these newly created flap to change which parts are touching

Leaving you with this

Then you start pulling the top “tabs” down

Do both sides to get the final folded form

Decorate as desired.

This is the ADHD Teapot. I made it in a ceramics class a few years ago. I use it to explain executive dysfunction to people who haven’t come across the term before (and those who think of ADHD mostly as Hyperactive EightYear Old Boy Syndrome).

So, most people’s brains are like a regular shaped teapot with a single spout. Let’s say that your time, energy, focus etc is the liquid you have in the teapot. Your executive function is the spout, that directs the tea into the specific cup you want to fill-aka the task that you’re meant to be doing. Spills happen occasionally, but generally most of the tea goes in the right cup.

If you have executive dysfunction, you have multiple spouts going in different directions. You can try pointing one of them at your chosen cup and you will probably get some liquid in there, perhaps you will even fill it right up (finish the task). But meanwhile, tea is also pouring out of several other places and not going where you want it. If you have another container nearby, perhaps some of it will end up in there. But quite a lot of it is going to end up on the floor and accomplish nothing.

And at the end of the day you’ll have filled one or two cups ( or sometimes not even one) compared to the five or six that somebody with the same sized teapot (but only one spout) has filled, and everyone wonders why you’re so bad at getting tea poured, and why you make such a mess in the process.

One day I’d like to spend more time learning pottery and create a really technically good fucked up little adhd teapot. But that’s a long way off since i currently live in the outback and the nearest pottery workshop is some 400km away. But I figure that for now, it might be a useful or interesting metaphor to somebody even in its rough draft form.