Chaotic Knife Gremlin

at some point in your life you will be boiling fruit, water, sugar, and lemon juice in a pot to make a syrup or jam. the instructions will tell you to simmer for a certain amt of time. your timer will go off and you will look at the pot and go, "hm, this doesn't look thick enough. maybe i'll let it go for another 10 minutes." this is the devil speaking. it's only so liquid right now because it is at boiling point. it will thicken when it cools down. learn from the follies of my youth and do not let this happen to you

at some point in your life you will be making a sauce or a stew in which you need to add cornstarch to thicken it. and you will prepare a slurry of starch in cold water and think "this looks like way too little starch to thicken this amount of liquid." this is the devil speaking. cornstarch instantly polymerizes at 95°C and if you add too much it will turn into an impossibly thick goop.

at some point in your life you will be making some sort of cream based dessert that requires gelatin to thicken it. and you will soak some gelatin sheets in water and think "this is too few gelatin sheets for this amount of cream." this is the devil speaking. it will thicken in the fridge and if you add too much you will end up with milk jelly

at some point in your life you will be baking cookies. you will take the sheet out after twelve minutes as the recipe instructs and the cookies will still be glistening and soft. "these don't seem cooked enough," you will think to yourself, "i should place them back into the oven until their edges are nice and golden." this is the devil talking. this is how you get dry, overdone cookies. the cookies will continue to bake on the warm sheet for several more minutes and then harden up after sitting on a rack for a while. trust the process. trust the process.

sex criminal j k rowling bullies amnesty international into retracting unbiased report about genocidal risks, after paying for the manufacture of a scottish devolution crisis over the same issue

having unwashed hair will have you believing shit like i can’t be saved

as seen in today's detail diatribe

That sounds more like a solution than a problem to me, the meeting hater

Shhhhhh, don't tell Management.

asexuality is word that describes an orientation, not a set of behaviors, ace people can do all kinds of sexual behaviors and still be asexual. some ace people have sex, some don't. some ace people kiss, some don't. some ace people masturbate, some don't. some ace people get homoerotically stabbed, some don't. it's as easy as that to understand.

Well, well, well. If it isn't the consequences of someone else's actions that I am directly impacted and severely affected by