All the good lizard urls are taken

me. and you. and zaboomafoooo

“why don’t they teleport back” because they’re not on the planet where everyone can teleport anymore. try to keep up dumbass

dr. macklemore (podiatrist): i fix your granddads toes

The weirdest guy I ever met in a church was this boy who referred to “Buzz Aldrin and his husband” going to the moon. I was completely baffled, and when I asked if he’d misspoken, he got really angry and accused me of being deliberately ignorant of the facts. It turned out that he was somehow comvinced that Buzz Aldrin and Neil Armstrong were married. It took five Wikipedia articles to convince him otherwise.

Romcom where two dudes in the 1960s fall in love and come up with an elaborate plan to become astronauts to get married in space because gay marriage is illegal everywhere but it can’t be illegal on the moon

Might make things a little awkward for Mike Collins.

He was the officiator

This is an excellent take. He officiated in orbit, and the landing was their Honey Moon.

Oh my god they were moon mates.

make a wish kid who demands that all the doctors in the hospital run a train on his mom

the phrase really should be "eat your cake and have it too" im with the unabomber on this one

"Not dating or having sex isn't even a source of discrimination in real life-" How many rights and benefits are tied up in marriage contracts though? How much of our economic and societal structure is built with the clear expectation that people couple up and support each other? Where's the security nets and affordable options for people who will never have a partner/spouse to take care of them? How many people save serious commitment only for people they have a romantic and sexual relationship with? How many people will unquestionably prioritize their sexual and romantic relationship above all other social connections in their lives? And where does that leave the people who don't want that at all, ever?