Sheeping Around

we are gonna be vacuuming up this post for the next five years

I am a huge fan of retiring to my quarters

In this economy you'll be lucky to retire to your nickels

you contradict yourself because you contain multitudes. i contradict myself because i am wrong.

whys combat and military gear always got to look so fucking cool when the people wearing them just objectively arent. thats unfair

this goes for like, all of time. knights are serving the KING? the fucking KING?

you cant serve cunt and the government at the same time come on now pick the right side i know you have it in you

Jesus said this. Matthew 6:24

ashes to ashes, dust to dust, reeses to pieces

And sluts to sluts.

amen

fucking spot the difference game

what’s the difference between a piano, a tuna, and a pot of glue?

you can tuna piano, but you can’t piano a tuna

What does glue have to do with this

i knew you’d get stuck there

good lord they died in this glue trap

for april fools we’re deleting this entire site sayonara you weeaboo shits

honest to god fill my uterus with these, how many will fit? how many until its noticeable? lets make a game out of it! get them big ass balls into me

hi

You should all be beaten like piñatas

dont do that bro the fucking boba r gonna shoot out

waters so amazing because you can drink it really sloppy style and like spill it all over yourself and it doesnt even leave a stain. you dont even have to wash it out/ . because its already washed

yet another massive w for water, the greatest fluid in the universe

Hate that this post keeps becoming true again and again

"everybody hates me" factoid actually just a statistical error. The average person doesn't hate you, especially not your friends. You, a person who sits in your room experiencing self loathing every day, are an outlier adn should not have been counted.

This is sweet but I really thought it was going to end with someone named “Haters Horge” who spends every second in a cave halfway across the world just loathing you for no reason and they were the statistical outlier