this is how i feel too, i just wanted to share some extra thoughts on this
i was coming to terms with being bi right in the 2010s, when the term pansexual started gaining widespread usage. at the time, i was horrifically confused as a genderqueer trans person that "Bisexual" was being called a "trans exclusive" identity. i remember being told by friends at the time that i should switch to calling myself pansexual because other people would view me as a transphobe if i didn't. me. a trans person. trans people can be transphobic, but as a genderqueer person, i was not seeing bisexuality the way other people were
bisexuality has a LONG history and culture. it's not to say that pansexuality's relatively short history means it's an invalid attraction. it's not- pansexuality is totally fine. but some people are really drawn to the history and culture of bisexuality. for most of us, bisexual is the first multispectrum label we learn. it's a term that has a lot of presence and rightfully so. it was the first multispectrum community we ever had to go to
like you, i fought to reclaim bisexuality and say that i'm bi and proud. the term i specifically was wrestling with for all those years was bisexual. i was questioning being bi when i came out. for years, i wanted to identify as bisexual, but couldn't because i felt i wasn't "bi enough". when i wanted to come out as bi, it was being seen as a "fad" that you "grow out of". i want to fight for my bisexuality. it's mine. i don't have to call it pansexuality if i don't want to.
as a matter of fact- i'm a t4t bisexual. i define my bisexuality as being a gay man and a lesbian, but also being attracted to all trans, genderqueer, and gender non conforming identities. like, it might blow some people's minds, but you don't *have* to identify as pansexual to include transness. all of my modes of attraction are t4t. it's not just men and women that i'm interested in! i'm bi, and this is how my bisexuality manifests. i define my bisexuality.