still crawling out of burnout but i finally got to watch iron lung and im not immune to.. drawing the strays...

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@sewingmonster
still crawling out of burnout but i finally got to watch iron lung and im not immune to.. drawing the strays...

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people who do a PhD are running from something
the job market
Boarboy, 2025
Hey, you, cis girl that's very (correctly) vocal about women being allowed to talk about their periods, do you include trans women in that?
I ask because every single time I've tried to talk about it to anyone that isn't a trans woman they get fucking angry. Which has caused me to have to just suffer in silence every single month. So I really relate to cis women when they talk about literally the exact same thing; being shamed by everyone around them their whole lives for talking about their periods, so they just suffer in silence every month as it negatively impacts their work and social lives. But I don't even feel like I can voice that I am literally dealing with the same exact thing because most of y'all react like you want to throw me in front of a bus for saying it, even those of you who act like your such big great transfem allies.
I guess I'll take this opportunity to talk about trans women periods. The first thing any tme person thinks when they hear this is always "how can trans women have periods? They don't have uteruses!"
The answer is: the uterus isn't what causes your period, it is effected by your period. What causes your period and what causes trans women's periods is the same thing: the endocrine system.
HRT changes the sex of your endocrine system. Feminizing HRT makes it a female endocrine system, giving us a 28-day hormone cycle just like cis women. At the end of that cycle, the hypothalamus floods the body with prostaglandins. Those are what cause all but one of the period symptoms, because they make muscles inflame and contract. They are what make the uterus shed its lining, they are what cause intestinal cramps, they are what cause body aches, they are what cause headaches and migraines. The only period symptom not causes by the release of prostaglandins throughout the body is depression, and that is caused by your endocrine system simply not processing as much estrogen and from simply feeling like shit.
So, the only symptoms trans women don't get every 28 days is menstrual cramps, because yes we do not menstruate since we don't have uteruses. But migraines, depression, body aches, intestinal cramps, and the infamous "period shits" don't exactly add up to us having any better of a time. Except we have to pretend that we're fine and nothing is different because no one believes that we get periods, not even cis women.
"But you can't call it a period then because that refers to MENSTRUATION!" is another one I hear all the time. This is incorrect. You use the word "period" instead of just "menstruation" because it doesn't just refer to menstruation. It refers to a period at the end of the hormone cycle where we experience a host of symptoms. And not all cis women experience all of the symptoms that encompass the period. Not all cis women get migraines, or body aches, or have severe depression. If a cis woman gets a hysterectomy she doesn't menstruate either! In that instance she experiences an identical period to what trans women experience. Yet, I doubt you'd insist that cis women who've had hysterectomies don't have periods.
Oh, another thing that I personally discovered after bottom surgery: vaginal odor changes for trans women during our periods too. I was not expecting that because I always thought it was just from menstruation. But nope, the ph levels of a trans woman's vagina are the same of as a cis woman's vagina, and it changes during our periods just the same.

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The thing about radical kindness (or any kindness, for that matter) is that there are going to be times when someone or something makes you regret it. There are going to be times when you show someone empathy and grace that they don't "deserve". There are going to be times when someone takes that kindness and uses it against you. The world doesn't magically transform into a perfect place when you decide to choose kindness and people will take advantage of it. People will continue to be shitty.
But the thing is...that's not a flaw of kindness. That's not a you problem. That's a them problem. People who are happy with themselves and their lives don't go out of their way to misuse someone's kindness or grace. The "normal" response to kindness or empathy is not to find a way to exploit it. People who are happy with themselves don't look for ways to hurt people for no reason. Kindness will never be the problem. No matter what some shitty person decides to do with it. It should go without saying not to be a doormat, yes. Don't allow people to treat you badly just for the sake of being kind. But also don't let shitty people make you bitter because of how they treated you when you were kind.
JUNE 24TH!!!
My old person take today is that I feel like people have normalized being on your phone every single moment including when you're spending "quality" time with others so much that they're defensive if someone isn't ok with it. Yes, you have a problematic relationship with your phone and social media if you physically cannot put it down for a couple of hours to like, have dinner with your friends. It's a show of respect for other people's time and energy as well as important to be present and connect with people around you. Your parents who told you no phone at the table were right for that one.
*looking at the OC I crafted with my own hands* what the actual hell is her problem

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im always saying this
its awesome that neither mind reading nor god are real and all of the thoughts inside of your head are completely private and consequenceless forever #myprivacy
In light of recent events, I have begun submitting bug reports when I see mature content labels applied inappropriately to posts, especially if an appeal has been rejected.
Extremely good idea - how are you doing it? Through the contact us option?
Yeah itâs one of the options on the Contact Support form:
for what it's worth: after a few months of submitting help tickets as 'feedback' when i saw a post inappropriately flagged as mature, i tried following this suggestion instead. today i got my first-ever response from tumblr support on this issue, letting me know that a post i'd submitted a ticket before has had its mature content flag removed.
Found this randomly on a walk. I didn't see any sharp blades or anything anywhere so I'm???
people need to talk about socially acceptable abuse more. it's literally why we're a system. the spanking that people refuse to believe is physical abuse when there are multiple studies showing it affects kids just as much as any other type of physical abuse. the way a parent might talk down to their kid their entire life and make them feel like they cant make any choices themself or be independent that they only notice when someone else points out how their parent(s) talk too and about them. the parentification of the oldest kid(s) when they have a single parent. the unnoticeable praise towards the "easy" child that all the other children pick up on. the neglect the "easy" child has to go through. a kid being punished for going to their parent(s) when they mess up and need help. not being taught how to clean or cook or do laundry or even how to wash certain parts. it all destroys a kid and it was all socially acceptable in my family and in the communities i grew up in.
- đ°

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a lot of rpf can be explained by the fact that actors are all like that with each other constantly but i never want to say that on here because it feels like telling a 7-year-old santa isnât real
actors hanging off of each other constantly isnât a sign that theyâre fucking itâs a sign that they were once in a BFA program and never relearned normal boundaries. when actors are fucking and itâs complicated they wonât even stand in the same room with each other.
Love when the âIâm going to shame disabled people into having better hygiene practicesâ person shows up on my dash. đ
Shaming people into taking better care of themselves doesnât work. Making fun of them for not doing laundry as often as you think they should is just cruel.
You know one reason people may start falling behind in care tasks? Depression. You know something that can cause or worsen depression? Shame.
Okay so Iâm gonna make this the positivity post.
Youâre doing fine. Itâs okay.
Do what you can when you can and thatâs fine.
But also, if thereâs someone in your life that can help, please donât let shame or embarrassment prevent you from seeking that help. If you genuinely canât keep up with certain tasks, please consider asking a trusted person for assistance.
And donât listen to anyone disparaging you. They donât know your life. They arenât in your shoes. They canât understand the difficulties you face. And ultimately, your actions donât effect them.
Do what you are able to do when you are able to do it. Seek help if you are able and need it. Youâre doing your best and thatâs all that matters.