you may find me having intense spiritual breakthroughs and revelations just to completely forget about them one week later don’t worry about me i am on my path
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The trans guy neck hump, or “dowagers hump” is not exclusive to trans men but it is a result of a specific hunching posture trans guys often use to hide their tits. It’s barely noticeable to the average person so it’s not worth getting insecure about, but there are ways to get rid of it. I got rid of mine with lifting/stretching/being more aware of my posture.
Many have noticed that the medical professional is wearing a San Francisco Giants jersey, this is because it’s legendary baseball player Barry Bonds who holds the record for most home runs in a single career, making him the most qualified man for this maneuver.
being a kid and hearing adults say stuff like "woah 2011 was 4 years ago haha" didn't really convey the fucking horror of a youtube video crossing my recommended labelled "9 years ago" and it's from 2017. that's not true. 9 years ago is 2010 or something. don't lie.
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okay so, guy at work, who i find out afterwards is famous at this place for being a sex pest, comes up and starts with what i also learn is his favorite opener to conversations where he’s going to be a sex pest, namely: “Do you know where the term ‘blow job’ comes from?”
and here he made his first fatal error. his moment of hubristic sex pesting. because of course i know where the term blow job comes from, i love learning about sex and the history of sexual terms! i know so much about oral sex that i could write a book on it!
his second error: approaching a little autistic freak with what he intended to be an uncomfortable sex question that would make me feel weird and gross. Friends, Romans, Countrymen, I Have Never Misjudged A Man’s Intentions So Incredibly In My Life. because i did not realize he was trying to harass me. because i love talking about sex facts, albeit not usually at work. unless. someone prompts me. my coworkers are the kind of people who are generally online enough to know terms, but not exactly what they mean, and they realized they could ask me a while back and get good answers without the resulting awkwardness because i do not experience shame. i am primed to answer questions like the one he has proposed.
So I Answered It.
and well, really, what happened is that I began answering it, then realized the answer required a bit more context. I mean, you can’t just say “oh, well, the term first appears in writing in the 1940s” without first explaining that ‘blow’ by itself already had sexual connotations for centuries, and then, really, are we talking about the origin of the term or the origin of the act. and well we have a ton of literature and art depicting fellatio throughout human history, did you know a lot of it was men performing it on other men? oh, that reminds me, there are a multitude of latin words for oral sex performed on penises, and hold on let me quote you the entirety of catullus 16 from memory and explain it’s fascinating insights into the roman world of homosexuality-
i do not know how to turn any of this ^ off, by the way. i’m sure some people out there have a switch that disables their infodumping mid-speech. i do not. and i also didn’t realize he wasn’t looking for a real answer until my other coworker explained so hours later. he could not excuse himself from the conversation he started, and i made a conservative man at least 30 years older than me to listen to my catullus recitation. i will sodomize and facefuck you, indeed.
anyway, i think i got a bad grade in being sexually harassed. my pro tip is maybe don’t start with what a very autistic individual will misconstrue as you earnestly asking them to explain sex to you. the special interest shield will cause splashback damage.
“Do it scared” “do it alone” are all great tips, but my biggest takeaway from therapy is do it messy. This is especially true if you’re getting out of a burnout, which I experience often. Literally just do it messy. You don’t need to pick the perfect trail to walk, the perfect playlist to listen to, whatever the fuck it is. You don’t need to have a meticulous to do list and wake up at the exact time you planned and drink the exact amount of water you planned to drink. Like the biggest thing for people like me to remember is sometimes it’s okay to do it messy. Put on a random yt workout and just get it done in sweats. Do 5 minutes of a daunting task and go from there. Sometimes just getting up is a win during intense burnouts or depressive funks. Literally just do it messy.
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my general position on public nuisance is "you should do your best not to irritate or inconvenience other people unless there's a good reason" and then litigate the "good reason" on a case by case basis. i think that's the best anyone can do. the definition of "good reason" varies wildly depending on context, your background, culture generally, what data you have as a participant or a bystander, and local laws, and all three of these things are relevant factors
for example it really does lower my level of reactive, irritable stress with my neighbors to know their names and general schedules. i don't know why but it really does bother you less if Kyle Upstairs is having a party a little too late and you can hear Bulletproof through the ceiling, as opposed to if you're on year three of living underneath some anonymous fuckhead you want to kill. it's like oh Kyle's cousin is visiting and they're just chilling out maybe they lost track of the time. this makes all the difference. as usual the best advice is to form community with the people around you no matter what, even if you are entirely self-interested it will benefit you in the end. well that's all I got
I like to think about "in what situation would I be doing the thing they're doing?". People on the phone in the train, or loud outside, or anything really. And most often I come to the conclusion that I'm currently being a grumpy buzzkill who had a bad day and is taking it out on someone having fun. Me being grumpy shouldn't disqualify others from having fun. Usually it helps snapping me out of being a grouch as well.
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