Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
your strengths are harder to see than your weaknesses because the problems you're good at solving don't appear as problems, because you're so good at handling them before they become problems... unlike the relatively rare problem that becomes a crisis, which demands undue attention. it's sort of like a reverse survivorship bias. the problems that become noticed as problems, the moments where you notice your capacity has a gap, are only the ones that aren't cut off at the pass by your strength and capability, before they become problems. so if all you focus on is problems then all you'll see is your weaknesses. which isn't accurate
I feel like one of the conversational skill failures it’s really easy to fall into is assigning the other person an opinion, rather than asking what their opinion is. This kind of inherently puts them on the back foot, which is uncomfortable, so people don’t like it.
Starting a conversation by informing the other person that you KNOW their feelings, and you are acting based on the feelings you assume they have, without giving them a chance to tell you what feelings they ACTUALLY have… No one likes this!
You may have learned it from your parents doing it to you, in which case I can only imagine you didn’t like it either, but you still internalized it as an acceptable mode of communication because we are always internalizing stuff from our parents even though we don’t like it. It’s kind of a quintessential passive-aggressive parent move: “well, you never want to help me, you don’t appreciate everything I do for you” etc. It puts the addressee in the position of defending themselves and their actual feelings instead of inviting them to SHARE those feelings.
People generally find it easier and more pleasant to converse with you if you go into it with an attitude of curiosity rather than what is essentially a power-play. Assigning your interlocutor an opinion based on your assumptions about their internal experience expresses an unconscious sense that you believe you are and should remain in control of the conversation. But friendly conversations aren’t really supposed to be about control.
(7/30/26) The Red Cross just declared the second US blood crisis in its history.
Summer sees both a drop off in donations and, at least for our trauma center, a spike in traumas. Trauma centers across the US are in danger of running out of blood for our trauma patients TODAY, which is very scary but, unlike much of the other scary national news coming across our screens these days, is something you can help fix immediately and directly.
We need ASAP donations of blood, for people to spread the word, and for manager types to help facilitate others' donations. All blood types are needed, but universal donor blood (type O) is especially dire.
My handwriting is the same style as the teacher’s who I had when I was nine. I’m now twenty one and he’s been dead eight years but my i’s still curve the same way as his.
I watched the last season of a TV show recently but I started it with my friend in high school. We haven’t spoken in four years.
I make lentil soup through the recipe my gran gave me.
I curl my hair the way my best friend showed me.
I learned to love books because my father loved them first.
How terrifying, how excruciatingly painful to acknowledge this. That I am a jigsaw puzzle of everyone I have briefly known and loved. I carry them on with me even if I don’t know it. How beautiful.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
the man who owns and runs the thai restaurant in my town knows me by name. he is one of the kindest and most thoughtful men i know. i started ordering from his place back in january, which was when i got my fibromyalgia diagnosis. back then i was using a walker, had limited mobility in my entire body but especially my hands, and was very visibly in pain. i always ordered the same thing: yellow curry with no meat, potatoes and carrots only (i have texture and other dietary issues). he always made it a point to make sure i could get out the door and carry the food safely. he had his workers package the food so that it was easier for me to open. as i kept coming back and i told him a little bit about my health status, he would always encourage me to keep going. he told me about how the spices he used were good for inflammation and began to edit the recipe just for me so that spices that were even better for fighting inflammation were used. he’d give me extra portions and despite the fact that i would tip every time, i realized later that he never charged my card for them. as time went on and my condition began to get better, especially with the help of a physical therapist, he would make encouraging remarks and tell me how happy he was for me. the day i came in without my walker, he practically jumped for joy, and despite my insistence, he gave me my meal for free that day. i continue to make progress with my conditions and i continue to go to the thai place. this man who does not know me personally and who i hardly know anything about is one of my favorite people. it’s interactions with humans like these that make loving life easier. and his curry really does help my chronic condition. it’s comfort food taken to the next level.
Actually for some people it does and part of my point was that those people deserve to have their efforts acknowledged and respected when they put in the work needed to treat others right even though it doesn't come easily or naturally to them
I always think of the description I saw years ago: Self-imposed deadlines don't help me, because I know the person who set them, and they're full of shit.
Give yourself the treat before you start. I'm serious. And ideally during the task and afterwards too.
Executive dysfunction comes from a lack of available dopamine. Common advice is wrong. You need to provide your own dopamine before you can start. Otherwise you're trying to run your car on empty.
"But what if I still don't do it" well you already weren't getting it done anyway. Now you have a little treat. Try again later.
You deserve kindness and care even when you aren't being productive.
(Also read How to Keep House While Drowning by KC Davis)
I give my students a LOT of techniques for starting writing when it feels overwhelming or daunting, but one of them is exactly this: dopamine load BEFOREHAND. It may sound weird to people on tumblr dot com, but a lot of people seriously struggle with executive dysfunction when it comes to writing literally anything, to the extent that it can cause such symptoms as panic, depression, and AI chatbot use.
I usually suggest this technique as a "Reverse Pomodoro." In the original Pomodoro, you work for 25 minutes and then take a break for 5 minutes (the times vary, but that's the essential ratio). People with executive dysfunction often find this insurmountable, and they get even more frustrated, and then the task seems even more difficult. So instead, flip those times.
FIRST, spend 25 minutes doing something energizing and engaging that you like to do. Not scrolling social media passively, not watching tv, not napping. Try something like colouring, doing yoga, running/walking around the block, talking about your favourite tv show with someone in real time, playing with the dog or cat, making and eating a lovely sandwich, hula hooping, something active. Having a little treat absolutely falls in this category!
(on the subject of little treats: refusing yourself food until you do work is for fucking Puritans and you can be kinder to yourself)
Then, after 25 minutes (or however long it takes to eat the sandwich or finish the yoga routine, it doesn't have to be exact), spend 5 minutes writing (or doing whatever you're struggling to start). Most people can coax themselves into doing something they find difficult for five minutes, if they have already filled up the joy/energy/engagement bucket. You can put a timer on for the 5 minutes if you want, or if you find that annoying, just work for as long as you like.
The other key is: don't push yourself to keep going when you're frustrated or tired—that will just reinforce the negative belief that you already have, which tells you that this task is painful to do, and needs to be avoided. If you've commonly had to force yourself to do this kind of task, that's likely part of why you think of it as painful and have trouble starting it now. Also, you should just, at a basic level, try not to put yourself in pain for the sake of productivity. So just do it till the good feelings run out. Then start hula hooping or colouring again for another 25 minutes. When the tank's refilled, try another 5 minutes of work, if you can. Adjust times to taste.
Not every technique works for everyone, but I've seen this one work for many students who are genuinely and seriously disabled by executive dysfunction. And many people find themselves getting more and more excited and engaged in the "difficult" task—because the good feelings from the hula hooping carry over, and because they're suddenly able to do the task without feeling pain, and feel accomplishment without feeling pain.
listen to me, this is so so important: you've gotta get used to really giving it your 60% as a default. like don't half-ass it necessarily but try not to go over 70% or so of an ass. you'll feel better and live a happier more fulfilled life, and on the rare occasions where you do need to lock the fuck in you'll be able to pull off bullshit that the sad miserable wretches giving it their 100% can never dream off, because they're busy draining themselves dry and you have energy reserves to spare.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
I'm Robin Finn, a trans artist with ME/CFS. I work entirely in traditional media, and run a little shop & mail club out of my bedroom studio with affordable prints & originals for other queers & spoonies. Give this post a reblog to help a housebound creator find my people!
to anyone in the areas impacted by the wildfire smoke, my #1 biggest piece of advice as someone whos been dealing with wildfire smoke in the NW united states for years, is build yourself a Corsi-Rosenthal Cube
they perform as well as expensive HEPA air cleaners, and are comparatively VERY inexpensive. all you need is a box fan, 4 air filters, a piece of cardboard, and some duct tape!!!!
i think it took us maybe a half hour to put ours together, if that, and we replace the filters every 3 months. it's really made a HUGE difference, both when the air quality is bad, but also with our allergies
As someone that has had to go through this while being very poor, I can say this is VERY effective. While this is a fantastic build, you can even do just a single filter against the fan, or a fan on one side of a cardboard box and a filter on the opposite side.
Can confirm - works GREAT! BUT!!! equally important - keep your windows CLOSED.. if you've got leaky seals around your doors, consider stuffing them with wet towels. keep that toxic crud out of your living space as best as you can.
Just swapped out the filters on our 1st Corsi-Rosenthal cube, and what a difference! Dusty old filter above, minty fresh one below.
This particular filter box spent 10+ months on low inside our house, catching tons of wildfire smoke, PM2.5, and COVID-19 aerosols, as well as pollen, dust, and mold. Glad all that's on THERE and not in our lungs!
I highly recommend building your own CR box for your home, school, work, mutual aid meet ups, etc. All you need is 4 MERV-13 filters (sold at most hardware stores), a 20" box fan, scissors, cardboard, and duct tape.
A new one costs about $75-100 - much cheaper and performs a lot better than a lot of fancy air purifiers. Building it with 2 people takes about an hour (mostly to measure and cut out the weird shroud thing), and swapping in new filters is much faster.
Check out the Clean Air Crew website to get started on your own filter fan box! We protect each other! 💪😷✨
Sharing this today because wildfire smoke is full of all kinds of dangerous particles from burned up buildings, cars, etc. But DIY filter fans like mine, air purifiers, and disposable respirator masks like KN95/N95s protect your lungs by snatching 95%+ of those particles out of the air.
If you're in a smoke zone, stay inside with air cleaning devices as much as you can and wear a respirator outside! People close to the fires should seek out reusable silicone/plastic respirator masks with filter cartridges that trap particles AND vapors (the same kinds that work for tear gas).
The 13th annual international gender census, collecting information about the language we use to refer to ourselves and each other, is now open until 13th August 2026.
It’s short and easy, for most participants it takes 5 minutes or less.
After the survey is closed I’ll process the results and publish a spreadsheet of the data and a report summarising the main findings. Then anyone can use them for academic or business purposes, self-advocacy, tracking the popularity of language over time, and just feeling like we’re part of a huge and diverse community.
If you think you might have friends and followers who’d be interested, please do reblog this blog post, and share the survey URL by email or at AFK social groups or on other social networks. Every share is extremely helpful!
Survey URL: https://survey.gendercensus.com
The survey is open to anyone anywhere who speaks English and feels that the gender binary doesn’t fully describe their experience of themselves and their gender(s) or lack thereof.
therapy resources / schema therapy / dbt/dialectical behaviour therapy / internal family systems / meditation / c-ptsd etc. resources
this is a link to my personal google drive, it has lots of dbt stuff, some random other resources that either i or my friends have found helpful incl. DID/OSDD/dissociation resources, & some handouts from a personality disorder program i did (was aimed at pplwbpd officially but the staff all refer to it as the "personality disorder clinic", fwiw)
bunch of other stuff under the cut including video content if that's more your thing
DBT stuff
this subreddit is a wonderful community, usually helpful with questions & has some resources linked also:
(the website name is very questionable but i can't find the pdf for free anywhere else orz. this is a good starting point for schema therapy tho. sorry y'all. i will steal it for my google drive when i have time)
(i'm just linking the paid site because i cant find them gathered like that anywhere else… dont have time to search each one individually rn lol. maybe another day)
free stuff:
https://positive.b-cdn.net/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Schemas-Needs-and-Modes-Reference-Sheet.pdf
(overview)
https://bmcpsychology.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s40359-020-0392-y/tables/1
(more detailed info on each schema)
http://www.schematherapy.com/id72.htm
(more info on modes)
https://positivepsychology.com/schema-therapy-worksheets/
(a few worksheets linked on that page)
Welcome!
I provide education on childhood trauma, conduct research, and advocate for healing from childhood trauma.
**PLEASE READ** My
(great channel run by a mental health practitioner who has experienced childhood trauma, he gets it. check out the playlists tab. he also has some free resources/worksheets on his website which is linked on his channel iirc)
attachment styles playlist by Jennifer May, Ph.D:
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLwPrhSDQ0V_smHuEjj2CxW4u7J_FozLlS
(cptsd content mostly, haven't watched much of her stuff but i liked what i did see. she isn't certified but she is someone who experienced childhood trauma as well).
healing cptsd (small channel, few videos but good info iirc):
https://www.youtube.com/@healingfromcomplexptsd2767
MEDITATION
Tara Brach is a leading western teacher of Buddhist meditation, emotional healing and spiritual awakening. This channel is a compilation of
(i cannot recommend her channel enough… i don't watch her longer videos/seminar(?) stuff but her meditation videos are like. actually helpful lol? i find a lot of that stuff not helpful at all but something about her is very calming and open and grounding. love her)
(she has some great videos for somatic symptoms... some playlists focus on anxiety relief, breathing/relaxation, posture/mobility, sleep, etc.)
-
Dr Daniel Fox channel:
https://www.youtube.com/@DrDanielFox/videos
(cw: ableism/ableist language toward cluster b's is present on this channel, he just has a LOT of videos so i include the link... like if youre looking for something specific to do with pd traits, there's a good chance you can find SOMETHING here. *i have mixed cluster b traits incl. the more demonized ones disclaimer*. but yeah steer clear if that bothers you)
-
Struthless channel:
big weird stories, hopefully good ones
(mostly adhd/exec dysfunction/motivational advice stuff but i find his videos like actually kinda inspiring/motivating so i'm including it here since not a lot of stuff... feels motivating to me at all ever. but i never regret clicking on his vids! good motivational speaker lol)
-
that's all i can think of rn please lmk if any of the links are broken or like... if you have a question u think i can help w ^-^
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
so many people ive known have pushed themselves to burnout trying to deny their disabled reality, skipping accommodations, skipping rests etc. and the world convinces them that the solution to their burnout is to push even harder. it’s a huge tragedy. i know social pressures make it tough but i want more disabled people to make things easier for themselves where possible, to opt out of things that harm them when possible, to quit while they’re ahead. be that person today! protect yourself where you can! take micro breaks while doing your hobby. get that shower chair. sit to brush your teeth. lie down in the middle of the day, even if only for 5 mins. these things add up and it’s so worth it.
2087
areudirty
andulkaphoto
izzy806
ellievsbear
gracieabrams
kianamaiart
