With You In The Dark

“Why do straight men act so gay with each other haha” bc they find gayness to be funny and feel the need to emasculate each other even when it’s on a friendly level. Do you have any other stupid fucking questions to ask me

Video game boss that's all bellowing bravado and big untargeted fuck-your-life attacks that hit half the arena, then for phase two they're like "hold up'' and put on a pair of ridiculously tiny glasses, and suddenly they're ten times as dangerous because now they can actually see what they're aiming at.

To be fair imagine you just arrived in 2018 from Victorian England and discovered Take On Me, what are you supposed to do, not blast it loud enough for your family to hear it all the way back in 1876?

had a friend who used to make new ones up on the spot. The only one that stuck with me was 'good golly jelly beans'. If something catastrophic happens I go for 'that's not ideal.'

after a couple hours chopping dried sea urchins into tiny pieces with a razor blade you start referring to the razor blade as yourself in your thoughts. a little while afterwards you'll inevitably think something along the lines of "i'm getting a bit dull, i'm going to have to throw myself out & get myself a new self" at which point your internal monologue has pretty much returned to baseline

This happens with mobility aids too. I bump into shit with my forearm crutches and say "ow" before I realize those are not, in fact, More Legs. Then when I get up and try to walk without them for a second there's a moment of feeling like a dog walking upright

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I'm still thinking about the guy who saw me realize my wheelchair wouldn't fit in the elevator because he (also a wheelchair user) was already inside it and immediately quipped, "This elevator ain't accessible enough for the both of us."

When that post nut clarity hits and you remember that you killed him 20 years ago